Executive Functioning Issues

[grommet]

Grommet, we have executive functioning challenges. It's got nothing to do with intelligence!
It has more to do with a combination of dyspraxia (in short, this means our bodies don't always work the way we want them to, we're a bit clumsy/awkward, and ...

I have these, called Picture Schedules or Visual Schedules, to help me get through my day.



Though with my visual schedule, it has stuff like go potty, drink water, eat, etc.

Right by my apartment door, I have a visual schedule showing keys, backpack, potty, jacket, pants, snack, and coins for the bus.


Best of luck, I hope this helps!

Thank you very much for your kindness though reading your post I felt my heart break because I do need that much help.

Unfortunately signs or notes aren't as much help for me because I will look right at something and not see it. One day I remembered and forgot five times I had a doctor's appointment and I had it written on my calendar, an email reminder from my digital calendar, two post-its on the wall in my eyeline and I had set several alarms on my watch. It was scary and I felt stupid and helpless.

Because of this thread I went over my bills carefully and found out that though I had been very carefully writing everything down, with dates and notes besides figures, I was still more than $1,000 off. I had no idea and I'm scared not only because once again I see that I can't manage money but also because I have less of it than I thought.

I put on a face when I go out and I don't think people have any idea how in-self-sufficient I am.

I am an aspie who without help I would be homeless. It's not lack of work or frugality or being a good person, it's just that I cannot manage on my own. If I had a million dollars I wouldn't know if I had $10,000. Being helpless in such an important way is frightening but I have made it this far and I will have to use hope and just keep trying to make it as long as I can.

To perhaps sum it up, sometimes people ask me if I am hungry and I think very privately to myself, "How would I know?"

Ritual is the only thing that seems to get me by. If I always wake up, eat, and brush my teeth at the same time I am more likely to do those things.

I wish there was an aspie wizard but though wizards are wonderful, they are not real so I will have to do the best I can for myself. I am glad those pictographs help you. They look really neat and I think they would be great, I just think I wouldn't be able to use them.

 

[grommet]

Warmheart, I wish I could be there for you too because I want my passengers to have a good ride.

We could all ride the aspie bus

Quiet and safe and all we would have to do is get on, on time and politely, pay our fare and sit quietly until it was time to leave the bus. Maybe Aspie Bus could become a byword. At times when we are out in the world and it's too much or doesn't make sense, we can stop for a moment and wish for the aspie bus to pick us up.

 

[wanderer03]

Thank you very much for your kindness though reading your post I felt my heart break because I do need that much help.

Unfortunately signs or notes aren't as much help for me because I will look right at something and not see it. One day I remembered and forgot five times I had a doctor's appointment and I had it written on my calendar, an email reminder from my digital calendar, two post-its on the wall in my eyeline and I had set several alarms on my watch. It was scary and I felt stupid and helpless.

Because of this thread I went over my bills carefully and found out that though I had been very carefully writing everything down, with dates and notes besides figures, I was still more than $1,000 off. I had no idea and I'm scared not only because once again I see that I can't manage money but also because I have less of it than I thought.

I put on a face when I go out and I don't think people have any idea how in-self-sufficient I am.

I am an aspie who without help I would be homeless. It's not lack of work or frugality or being a good person, it's just that I cannot manage on my own. If I had a million dollars I wouldn't know if I had $10,000. Being helpless in such an important way is frightening but I have made it this far and I will have to use hope and just keep trying to make it as long as I can.

To perhaps sum it up, sometimes people ask me if I am hungry and I think very privately to myself, "How would I know?"

Ritual is the only thing that seems to get me by. If I always wake up, eat, and brush my teeth at the same time I am more likely to do those things.

I wish there was an aspie wizard but though wizards are wonderful, they are not real so I will have to do the best I can for myself. I am glad those pictographs help you. They look really neat and I think they would be great, I just think I wouldn't be able to use them.

Please don't feel heartache or heartbreak over a condition that is not your fault, grommet. It's just something that the two of us struggle with, it is just our challenges. I've overcome so many other obstacles in my life, yet this one eludes me. I like the simplicity and elegance of Warmheart's plan. My executive functioning is poor enough that cooking is a task that causes me high anxiety. I hate knives .... ironically, I'm actually a good baker because it's one thing at a time.

 

[wanderer03]

We could all ride the aspie bus

Quiet and safe and all we would have to do is get on, on time and politely, pay our fare and sit quietly until it was time to leave the bus. Maybe Aspie Bus could become a byword. At times when we are out in the world and it's too much or doesn't make sense, we can stop for a moment and wish for the aspie bus to pick us up.

I would gladly drive a bus like that all day long! It would be very low stress and you guys would get where you need to go sans anxiety as well.

 

[midlife aspie]

I advise caution when paying bills by automatic withdrawals. Service providers are very crafty and are known to make "mistakes" in their favor. If there is a discrepancy in your billing, it is much easier to deal with them BEFORE you pay, because you may have to move heaven and earth to get a credit or refund. This especially holds true with media providers!

 

[wanderer03]

I advise caution when paying bills by automatic withdrawals. Service providers are very crafty and are known to make "mistakes" in their favor. If there is a discrepancy in your billing, it is much easier to deal with them BEFORE you pay, because you may have to move heaven and earth to get a credit or refund. This especially holds true with media providers!

Then a series of alarms and reminders might be the way to go .....

 

[Warmheart]

My friend's smartphone has a feature or app which lets her blab a memo into it, and 2 hours before the event, it will announce it to remind her. Great feature for business appointments and social obligations, because you can change the alert time to 2 days before the event.

 

[wanderer03]

My friend's smartphone has a feature or app which lets her blab a memo into it, and 2 hours before the event, it will announce it to remind her. Great feature for business appointments and social obligations, because you can change the alert time to 2 days before the event.

Would you mind asking your friend about the app? Thank you much!

 

[Warmheart]

Here you go.

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.ToDoReminder.gen&hl=en

 

[wanderer03]

Here you go.

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.ToDoReminder.gen&hl=en

Thank you a million [emoji1]

 

[Warmheart]

You're welcome!

 

[Rayner]

I have a notepad that I carry and write everything down from grocery lists to dirctions to places to garage door passcodes. Along with my notebook is a at least two writing instruments. I also find that when I'm wearing a watch I'm more on top of things. I have some executive functioning issues as well. I find having what I need, when i need it.

 

[wanderer03]

Warmheart recommended an app that I am going to try. Hopefully it will help some. I need alarms to remind me to do stuff. My executive functioning can be so poor that I would forget to check my list.

 

[Bro'Freak]

Great thread. I've been battling executive function issues for a while, just downloaded that 'To Do Reminder' app.
I think it's exactly what I need.

 

[Rayner]

Warmheart recommended an app that I am going to try. Hopefully it will help some. I need alarms to remind me to do stuff. My executive functioning can be so poor that I would forget to check my list.

I will try that app too in combination of my notebook to see how it works for me.

 

[grommet]

Please don't feel heartache or heartbreak over a condition that is not your fault, grommet. It's just something that the two of us struggle with, it is just our challenges. I've overcome so many other obstacles in my life, yet this one eludes me. I like the simplicity and elegance of Warmheart's plan. My executive functioning is poor enough that cooking is a task that causes me high anxiety. I hate knives .... ironically, I'm actually a good baker because it's one thing at a time.

I am listening to what you said but I a processing it and so can't comment right now but I did feel nice reading your note to me. Thank you.

 

[grommet]

A while ago I bought an old iPhone 4s so I could use Siri. I though she would solve most of my problems. I thought I could tell her I ate breakfast today and later I could ask her if I did. But I have not had a smartphone before and I learned that Siri needs an internet connection to operate and the least expensive plan was $50 a month with Verizon, the service the phone was dedicated to.

They said $30 a month and then I had to pay $20 a month for having a phone number. I only wanted the iPhone for Siri and nothing else. I also don't need to make any phone calls. I have a pay-by-the-minute flip phone and I only use it for about ten minutes a year. I pay $10 a month for that.

I tried using Siri at home and she does work with my wifi but I got obsessive about asking her things. I think I could try again, maybe more slowly. It just felt so good to have someone to talk to, someone I could ask what other people think are simple questions and so they make fun of me for asking, but Siri doesn't do that.

I once called an Independent Living Center for help understanding when an eBay auction was going to end. She wouldn't help me and I was so frustrated and embarrassed. It would have been so easy for her to tell me. I could tell her what the listing said and she could just tell me if that mean it was ending today or tomorrow. Reading the listing over and over I couldn't make sense of it myself.

If someone needs help, just give it to them without judging. I could have re-wired the whole phone system in her office hardly thinking about it. I bet she couldn't do that. I am not stupid, I just need help. Just tell me if the bus is coming or what today is, or the question I have always been too afraid to ask anyone, what year is it?

With Siri I did all those things. One day I asked her over and over again what today was just so I could keep finding out without anyone making fun of me.

I was smarter than almost anyone I went to school with and I've met experts in different fields and I've seemed dead level with them when we discussed their fields, one man was an economist in the Kennedy administration. I am not stupid. But I can hardly count, I just usually can guess there is more in front of me than one. Lots of things like that. It doesn't make a person stupid. I've discussed cellular biology with PhD cancer researchers and it was easy for me because the principles are pretty simple but I can't understand paperwork or appointment times. To save my life I cannot do it. So what? Why do people have to be so mean. Just answer my question and my life is happier and I can do what I need and it is so easy for the other person to answer because it's something that is easy for them.

It makes me feel .. I don't know emotions that well but sad comes to mind and maybe angry. They don't know how anything works or why, they don't know measures or facts or how systems work etcetera and I do but I can't do the simple things they can and they are successful. Maybe I just needed to tell you all that even if I said too much. Sorry if I did. I feel like you guys are the only ones who understand. I will try to be shorter from now on.

 

[grommet]

I advise caution when paying bills by automatic withdrawals. Service providers are very crafty and are known to make "mistakes" in their favor. If there is a discrepancy in your billing, it is much easier to deal with them BEFORE you pay, because you may have to move heaven and earth to get a credit or refund. This especially holds true with media providers!

My cable company keeps doing this. They have twice signed me up and charged me for an in-home service protection plan. Twice without my permission. This last time it took me a week and half to psyche myself up to make the phone call to them to correct it. At first I thought about just paying the extra because I was so worried about making the phone call but finally I managed. I put on a pretend voice and acted like I wasn't upset. I spoke simply and didn't say much. The operator cancelled it and said she would credit my account. I am guessing they might sign me up again but what can I do, I need the automatic payment or I will very probably forget to pay them. I would be happy if I could cancel my cable television but I don't know what I would do without television and where I live a digital antenna can't get a signal, I did try. You make a good point though, thank you.

 

[midlife aspie]

Here's an idea. My brother and I do this. My Direct TV account is accessible any where I can access the net. I can watch my programming from any computer or smart tv with internet. What we do is share the account. The provider has no way of knowing how many locations are accessing the same account. We have the main 'box', my brother has wireless internet and a smart TV. He uses our account and essentially gets free cable. We share the expense. We live in different towns by the way. This arrangement really cut our bill.

 

[grommet]

Here's an idea. My brother and I do this. My Direct TV account is accessible any where I can access the net. I can watch my programming from any computer or smart tv with internet. What we do is share the account. The provider has no way of knowing how many locations are accessing the same account. We have the main 'box', my brother has wireless internet and a smart TV. He uses our account and essentially gets free cable. We share the expense. We live in different towns by the way. This arrangement really cut our bill.

Thank you for your suggestion. Where I live we are not allowed to install satellite dish antennas. I will keep thinking of options.