CaveDweller
Diagonally parked in a parallel universe
Just wanted to write a few thoughts with regards to the Diagnosis process and aftermath having just gone through the former.
I'm 43 and self diagnosed a while back and pushed things on from there. Although convinced, I was still prone to bouts of doubt and became quite ill through this, but pushed ahead anyway.
Last week I went through Diagnosis and had it confirmed as 'Quite clear' that I was on the Autistic spectrum.
I was interviewed at length by a Consultant and a Speech & Language therapist, with many questions relating to my childhood and (at my age) a lot of distant and half forgotten memories and experiences from back then. The two interviewees were pleasant and tried to put me at my ease but the whole process still felt a bit judge and jury to me. The tiny room only added to the intensity. The hours actually flew by as I was in 'The Zone' the whole time with so much mind work going on.
I was asked if I could pop out of the room after the interview took place so they could discuss their findings. Upon retuning and having the condition confirmed I kind of blanked out and missed everything else that was said. I had to be told, 'You can leave now' at the end. It was only a short sentence but was a lot of information to take on board in one go. I walked out in a bit of a daze.
A few days later and of course it has more than sunk in and I have to say it is a blessed relief having been in limbo for such a long time.
It is also a time for re-evaluation. There is a strange sense of a new identity and it also places everything you have done in the past within a different context. I can say that I did my best but was hugely challenged by something that was beyond my control .
There is of course the issue of whether/who/how to tell people but that is something I will confront when ready.
Thanks for reading these few thoughts.
I'm 43 and self diagnosed a while back and pushed things on from there. Although convinced, I was still prone to bouts of doubt and became quite ill through this, but pushed ahead anyway.
Last week I went through Diagnosis and had it confirmed as 'Quite clear' that I was on the Autistic spectrum.
I was interviewed at length by a Consultant and a Speech & Language therapist, with many questions relating to my childhood and (at my age) a lot of distant and half forgotten memories and experiences from back then. The two interviewees were pleasant and tried to put me at my ease but the whole process still felt a bit judge and jury to me. The tiny room only added to the intensity. The hours actually flew by as I was in 'The Zone' the whole time with so much mind work going on.
I was asked if I could pop out of the room after the interview took place so they could discuss their findings. Upon retuning and having the condition confirmed I kind of blanked out and missed everything else that was said. I had to be told, 'You can leave now' at the end. It was only a short sentence but was a lot of information to take on board in one go. I walked out in a bit of a daze.
A few days later and of course it has more than sunk in and I have to say it is a blessed relief having been in limbo for such a long time.
It is also a time for re-evaluation. There is a strange sense of a new identity and it also places everything you have done in the past within a different context. I can say that I did my best but was hugely challenged by something that was beyond my control .
There is of course the issue of whether/who/how to tell people but that is something I will confront when ready.
Thanks for reading these few thoughts.