asperger men should not feel discouraged by females.

[eonbus]

whether your spectrum or not. people in general should be able to date and not feel rejected. its not like you have to go their house and do the bedroom duty. i honestly dont like how females reject so sudden when i say i dont wanna talk to you. a lot of females have some issues in their mind about someone. i can see it through their eyes. mainly it shouldn't be discriminated that females dont like Asperger men. autistic women can get dates. but you know what i say about that, i say they lie about it. if they were easier with dating. they wouldn't be hookups or angered inside. i mean love who they are not their body.

 

[midlife aspie]

There is an art to turning down a potential date without making that person feel rejected. In the end though, feelings cannot really be controlled. Only our actions in regard to them are controllable. Everyone discriminates in terms of potential mates, women and men. For the record, I would never turn down anyone who simply wanted to talk.

 

[Lee954]

I don't even get to the stage of being rejected...it's as though I don't exist.

 

[eonbus]

it was just a thread i put up.

 

[granolaturtle]

I object to this idea that autistic women can get dates. Granted I'm a lesbian, and being autistic as well, that kind of guarantees that I'll be alone all of my life.

 

[eonbus]

like i said i just threw it out there. sorry if i am offending people on this thread. and granolaturtle, dont worry.

 

[Andrew206]

I've gotten to the rejection stage a lot.....and it's painful. But I just keep trying. I know there's someone who'll accept me for who I am.

 

[eonbus]

i wasnt rejected. more like my relationships were nothing to me. i found wrong predictments in wrong times.

 

[Skeleton Canyon]

Rejection is part of life.
Also maybe the men just except them for who they are and love them for who they are. I know my boyfriend loves me for who I am and it means a lot.

 

[eonbus]

women judge to much. that needs to stop.

 

[granolaturtle]

women judge to much. that needs to stop.

How exactly are women "judging"?

 

[TeriM]

I don't think it is rejection as much as not understanding what ASD is and how it affects people. I am an NT dating an ASD guy. There is no doubt that our brains are wired differently! So if you meet an NT who has no idea about ASD they will misread the signals. Especially woman, we analyse everything and like to feel loved, in general even NT men think differently to NT women. It is a learning curve for sure. Hope my ramblings have made some sense )

 

[eonbus]

I don't think it is rejection as much as not understanding what ASD is and how it affects people. I am an NT dating an ASD guy. There is no doubt that our brains are wired differently! So if you meet an NT who has no idea about ASD they will misread the signals. Especially woman, we analyse everything and like to feel loved, in general even NT men think differently to NT women. It is a learning curve for sure. Hope my ramblings have made some sense )

it proves my point. thanks for the answer i was looking for.

 

[TeriM]

it proves my point. thanks for the answer i was looking for.

How did I prove your point? I'm trying to work out if I have just been insulted or not!
I am very happy in my relationship and wouldn't change my partner for the world but we both had to make adjustments in order to make it work. I didn't prove that no woman would date a guy on the spectrum or that females on the spectrum find it easier to get a date!

 

[qwerty]

whether your spectrum or not. people in general should be able to date and not feel rejected. its not like you have to go their house and do the bedroom duty. i honestly dont like how females reject so sudden when i say i dont wanna talk to you. a lot of females have some issues in their mind about someone. i can see it through their eyes. mainly it shouldn't be discriminated that females dont like Asperger men. autistic women can get dates. but you know what i say about that, i say they lie about it. if they were easier with dating. they wouldn't be hookups or angered inside. i mean love who they are not their body.

who is this 'someone' that all these women have mind issues with that you can see with your magic eyes?
we have to warn them quickly it sounds like they they could be in great danger.

 

[tree]

eonbus

All I can get from the original post is that
you are unhappy.

 

[eonbus]

Tree I am not happy because every time I give someone a chance, they blew it. I had to end a friendship with one girl.

 

[tree]

Tree I am not happy because every time I give someone a chance, they blew it. I had to end a friendship with one girl.

I am not sure what giving a person a chance means.

It could mean...just offering friendship toward a person.

Or it could mean that a person you already know has
behaved in ways you didn't like, but because you had
hopes for being friends....you let it slide/give them the
benefit of the doubt, for awhile.

Some acquaintanceships endure longer than others.

 

[theminx]

like i said i just threw it out there. sorry if i am offending people on this thread. and granolaturtle, dont worry.

I completely get what you're saying. I've always looked good on paper to men. So, getting asked out was never an issue. Things would start out fine...but it quickly would descend into...frustrations...often on both sides of the equation.

The worst thing for me has been...men have often tried to take advantage of me...physically. I didn't know I was an Aspie for most of my life, so...I often blamed these transgressions on myself. I would wonder what I did to make them want to do these things to me. I would turn the event over in my head...confused why they attacked me.

Once a guy invited me back to his room to study. He then locked the door. Then he sat down next to me...and launched himself at me. I got away. I left all my books there. But I didn't care.

Another time...a guy was giving me a ride home. He suddenly pulled off into the woods. Like the other guy...he suddenly attacked me. I burst out crying, lashing out...and he suddenly stopped. Called me a baby and drove me home.

There have been several other instances, but those give you an idea of what I'm talking about

Luckily, like I said, I was usually able to get away. But the the first time it happened, when I was 14, I was not so lucky.

So, I decided to start taking mixed martial arts based in Jeet Kune Do. Private lessons...

I remember my instructor told me something that struck a chord with me...he said...I don't understand why parents don't take their little girls to me when they are young. Then women like you wouldn't come to me when you're older in response to life knocking you down so often.

I know this deviates from the purpose of this post. And the topic was only being thrown out there...I think especially due to the difficulties Aspie men face dating as opposed to women. But then it made me realize...that because it is easier for us to meet men...it often lends itself to a whole different set of difficulties, such as the fact many NT men seem to sense us Aspie women's innate vulnerabilities and often seem to prey on us.

Have other Aspie or Autie women encountered this?

 

[eonbus]

\

I completely get what you're saying. I've always looked good on paper to men. So, getting asked out was never an issue. Things would start out fine...but it quickly would descend into...frustrations...often on both sides of the equation.

The worst thing for me has been...men have often tried to take advantage of me...physically. I didn't know I was an Aspie for most of my life, so...I often blamed these transgressions on myself. I would wonder what I did to make them want to do these things to me. I would turn the event over in my head...confused why they attacked me.

Once a guy invited me back to his room to study. He then locked the door. Then he sat down next to me...and launched himself at me. I got away. I left all my books there. But I didn't care.

Another time...a guy was giving me a ride home. He suddenly pulled off into the woods. Like the other guy...he suddenly attacked me. I burst out crying, lashing out...and he suddenly stopped. Called me a baby and drove me home.

There have been several other instances, but those give you an idea of what I'm talking about

Luckily, like I said, I was usually able to get away. But the the first time it happened, when I was 14, I was not so lucky.

So, I decided to start taking mixed martial arts based in Jeet Kune Do. Private lessons...

I remember my instructor told me something that struck a chord with me...he said...I don't understand why parents don't take their little girls to me when they are young. Then women like you wouldn't come to me when you're older in response to life knocking you down so often.

I know this deviates from the purpose of this post. And the topic was only being thrown out there...I think especially due to the difficulties Aspie men face dating as opposed to women. But then it made me realize...that because it is easier for us to meet men...it often lends itself to a whole different set of difficulties, such as the fact many NT men seem to sense us Aspie women's innate vulnerabilities and often seem to prey on us.

Have other Aspie or Autie women encountered this?

this had nothing to do with my thread. your posting something about abuse and neglect to your well being. if your in danger contact local athorities and let them know you got attacked.