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Taking things literally; any funny stories to share

My wife just said to me today that her ribs were killing her, and I imagined the ribs having hands and tiny knives stabbing at her!
 
Nope. They thought it was funny though. Apparently she forgot i was up there. I wasnt sure what to do. So i sat down and stared at the sky.
 
Sounds like me at the health center last time I had to go get bloodwork and a X-ray. They told me to get dressed and didn’t come back in to say I could leave. I stayed in the room for 40 minutes until a girl came in to restock the gowns and was like what are you doing in here?! I said waiting to hear when I can leave!
 
I was listening to the radio recently and a story began with the sentence , " New discoveries in science have . . . . . . . " , I didn't hear the rest because what I initially heard sounded like " Nudist coveries in science . . . . . ". So instead of listening to the story , I'm trying to figure out what a ' nudist covery ' is and why a nudist would want one . This also happens in conversations all the time and I get left behind in them . Kinda frustrating .
 
LateBloomer said:
I was listening to the radio recently and a story began with the sentence , " New discoveries in science have . . . . . . . " , I didn't hear the rest because what I initially heard sounded like " Nudist coveries in science . . . . . ". So instead of listening to the story , I'm trying to figure out what a ' nudist covery ' is and why a nudist would want one . This also happens in conversations all the time and I get left behind in them . Kinda frustrating .
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OMG yes...THIS exactly. I laughed so hard reading your comment because it's like, yay I'm not alone in this and I have experienced this many many times my whole life.
 
Here's another one , it just happened today . Once again , I was listening to NPR and tuned in just as they were having a discussion about the ' Tuesday solution ' in the Middle East . I had not heard of that one and was searching through the rubble of my mind when it finally occurred to me that they were having a discussion about the ' two state solution ' . Pfffffffftt !
 
ConfusedKetchup said:
OMG yes...THIS exactly. I laughed so hard reading your comment because it's like, yay I'm not alone in this and I have experienced this many many times my whole life.
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What I’d like to know is what am I doing when I change one word to a completely different one so it doesn’t even sound anything like the original word to me ?I changed among to upon ?Why did I think Jesus would walk upon men instead of among men :eek::oops:it still intrigues me
 
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