is it hard to trust neurotypicals?

[Andrew206]

A lot of the NTs I've met are compassionate, nice and honest. However, some NTs I've met aren't any of these things.

 

[OliveOilMom]

think they're dangerous? less loyal? pretending to like you and then stab you in the back?

No more so than anybody else in the world.

It's not an us vs them thing. Everybody has a different personality you know. Everybody is different. We aren't any better or worse than they are. It's not like we have a big sign on us that says "target" nor are they all bullies. Yes, some of us may have behaviors that make us a target, but so do lots of NTs. For the most part those behaviors are identifiable and can be changed to some extent. Thats what I did.

NT's and aspies aren't different breeds. We are the same, with just a little wiring differences. It seems that a lot of people on the spectrum want to see it like the movie "The Ten Commandments". They see us as the oppressed Hebrew slaves and the NT's as the Egyptians. That isn't how it is you know. It's individuals.

I married an NT, I have four NT kids (although I think my youngest son may have a little bit of AS like I do but not as bad - and he's not interested in finding out, he's hardcore about taking life as it comes and playing the hand you are dealt, like he is with the fact that he's totally deaf in one ear from birth and won't get an implant) and all of my friends in real life are NT's. I have no problem with NT's as a group although I've had many problems with NT's on an individual basis. I don't consider it as problems with NT's, I consider it as what it is - problems with douchebags.

Until we lose the victim mentality about the notion that we as a group are routinely abused by NT's as a group, then complaints about it aren't going to be seen as education, they are going to be seen as paranoia. Because most individual aspies tend to have problems with individual NT's many people have interpreted that as discrimination against people on the spectrum. While there is discrimination, and dislike by some people, all of it isn't like that. A lot of it is just *ssholes being *ssholes.

If you want NT's to see us as individuals and look past our diagnosis, then you need to start seeing them as individuals and start looking past their lack of a diagnosis.

 

[Ylva]

NT's and aspies aren't different breeds. We are the same, with just a little wiring differences. It seems that a lot of people on the spectrum want to see it like the movie "The Ten Commandments". They see us as the oppressed Hebrew slaves and the NT's as the Egyptians. That isn't how it is you know. It's individuals.

So you are saying "Not all NTs"?

As much as I would love to assume that everyone who supports things like chlorine dioxide therapies and Judge Rothenberg are psychopaths, the fact is I can't. Many are just naive or the equivalent of racists in the thirties who thought that non-whites should be pitied for being less intelligent, without ever bothering to check. I don't know if you have AS, but don't get all Gandhi on us. We're not looking to drive all NTs out of India, we want them to stop abusing handicapped people and to stop supporting abuse of handicapped people.

 

[OliveOilMom]

So you are saying "Not all NTs"?

As much as I would love to assume that everyone who supports things like chlorine dioxide therapies and Judge Rothenberg are psychopaths, the fact is I can't. Many are just naive or the equivalent of racists in the thirties who thought that non-whites should be pitied for being less intelligent, without ever bothering to check. I don't know if you have AS, but don't get all Gandhi on us. We're not looking to drive all NTs out of India, we want them to stop abusing handicapped people and to stop supporting abuse of handicapped people.

I'm about as far from Ghandi as you can get. ROFLMAO.

I don't think those are good therapies either, and don't much care for the JR center. I would hope that you know that not all therapies for autism are like that, and that while there have been, and will continue to be, bad treatments for lots of things, that doesn't make every treatment and every professional evil.

You can't blame every NT for a few bad therapies and a bad institution. Most people don't even know about the place, or even know about the therapies you talk about.

Are you actually trying to say that every NT is abusing handicapped people? Are you trying to say that all NT's support it?

You really can't generalize and entire group of people based on their neurology, you know.

As for me, I have AS and was professionally diagnosed in middle age. And as for not bothering to check about someone, I think my diagnosis is on my profile. ;-)

ETA; Closing down the center and stopping abusive therapies takes educating the public and the professionals. A media campaign is a great place to start. Finding someone to research the issues and write and sell a feature story on those things would go a long way toward reaching your goal.

 

[KinksFan]

I think that there's good and bad in everyone, no matter what their brain wiring is. I find it hard to trust some people, and I get along really well with others.

 

[wyverary]

Please remember we try to keep this place safe for those both on and off the autism spectrum. Broad generalizations only serve to hurt a particular group. Please keep the discussion respectful and not build straw man arguments that only prove a detriment to the discussion.

Thanks.

 

[pax]

It's hard for me to trust anyone because I've experienced the same types of unkindness from other people on the spectrum as from NTs. I was excited when I made a friend who'd been diagnosed earlier this year online... but all he ever wanted to do was complain to me, and stopped liking me so much when I told him I just couldn't listen that much. Same old, same old.

I had an aspie colleague like that. At first I thought they were going through a rough patch and just needed a little support. But nothing ever improved intact she complained more.

 

[pax]

Never read one so can't say, I taught my kids not to make targets of themselves

I still don't know how to do that. I think i make myself a tarrget by breathing sometimes.

 

[Aspergirl4hire]

NT or not, it hard for me to trust people in general.

Nailed it! One thing someone surprised me with was this: "And do you know that when people notice you don't trust them, they withdraw? The nicer ones?" That made me think. I'm still thinking about that one. What would it take for me to risk getting hurt if it also meant I had the opportunity to be less lonely?

 

[Crossbreed]

If you've seen one neurotypical, you've seen one neurotypical...!

 

[clg114]

If you've seen one neurotypical, you've seen one neurotypical...!

Well, that is one way that they are just like us.

 

[Ylva]

If you've seen one neurotypical, you've seen one neurotypical...!

They have their oddities, like their incessant animated social scripting and their obsession with eyecontact, but most of them are decent folks anyway.

 

[Progster]

I don't trust people in general, in the sense that I can't rely on them. People will say one thing, and then do another. They aren't consistent. Or they say they are going to do something, then don't follow through. The only person I can rely on to get things done is myself.