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Advice

autism opossum

Your Free Therapist
I am wearing pants that are a bit small. I was in history class and I dropped my water bottle. I bent down to grab it and my pants fell off. My underwear did a bit, too, but not fully. This girl, I'll call her Mean, slapped my butt and gripped it tightly. Some backstory on Mean: we are in middle school, but we went to the same elementary school. It has been a while since we've seen each other, but we used to be best friends in like 2nd grade. She does this to others, too. She tries to embarrass them. Should I tell someone? Does it count as Sexu@l harassment? Please help! Also, she bullies me, as well.
 
If pants are too small, wouldn't they be tight?

Anyway...yes that was mean of Mean.

Were there other people in the room when this happened?
The teacher?
 
I've had it done to me a few times, some woman think they get a free pass to do that and it's all a big joke
 
If pants are too small, wouldn't they be tight?

Anyway...yes that was mean of Mean.

Were there other people in the room when this happened?
The teacher?
The waist is worn, since I've had them a while. The teacher was present but was busy and didn't see
 
One thing I learned a long time ago, if you complain about it, you give the bully what he or she wants. If you play along and just laugh it off, you take away their power. You don't let them get to you. For example, the next time she does it, laugh and tell her that if she likes you that much, she could just ask you out on a date. Sounds like she tries to embarrass people, so maybe try to turn it around and embarrass her.
 
There will come a day when you can look back and understand that we were all insecure, stupid little twats in middle school. It's just a time when we are awkward and geeky and just trying to overcompensate by trying to be cool, a tough guy, the athletic jock, a mean girl, a princess, whatever the case may be. It sucks right now, of course, because everyone has a tendency to project themselves as if they are better than everyone else, even if it means bullying, lying, and teasing someone else to make themselves appear better than the other. It's this weird, pecking order behavior where people are always trying to one-up each other whilst still trying to find safety and security within some toxic group. Been there, done that, not proud of myself.

I think the best thing you can do is to quietly have the knowledge that you know what is going on and not to get emotional about it. The moment the other person sees you emotionally break, they, and others are going to find a victim in you and it will only get worse. It takes some emotional intelligence to have that sort of emotional control and stand up to it and fight or just roll with it and not react.

You will graduate from high school and all those people will likely be gone from your life. You will find your own people at work, at the university, wherever. Just remember, whether you have the best day of your life, or your worst day of your life, understand that "This too, shall pass."

Take care ;)
 
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