If you had a baby with someone you broke up with or had a fling with

[lovely_darlingprettybaby]

Would you keep it and love it even if the father did not want it
I always would and I would love her to death and still try to be a good mother.
I would just be lucky enough to get the chance to be a mother.

 

[Ella Spell]

That's what I did with my children from marriage so yes.

I've been on my own with them for 26 years while he slithered away and actually disowned one of them in court.

 

[Ella Spell]

Would you keep it and love it even if the father did not want it
I always would and I would love her to death and still try to be a good mother.
I would just be lucky enough to get the chance to be a mother.

Any chance you could have a boy, or are your hypothetical kids always girls?

 

[VictorR]

So I can't see myself being in a situation where I'd have a kid, let alone an unexpected one, but for the sake of the question... absolutely I'd try my best to raise and support them. I can't imagine walking away and not knowing what would become of them.

 

[Gerontius]

I don't see myself getting someone pregnant unless I was already married. Not interested in this sort of thing so I don't expect a kid.

 

[Hypnalis]

Birth isn't a random event. There are at least three stages where choices must be made.

The decision(s) include corresponding responsibilities.

 

[Gerald Wilgus]

I was never in a position to get anybody but my spouse pregnant. However, before marriage and knowing that birth control is not 100% effective, I know that I would take responsibility for any child I conceived. It is simple ethics.

I have known guys who got girls pregnant and abandoned them and I detest those man-children. What really puzzles me are that the tells are all there that this was within their character . . . the love bombing, the insistence on unprotected sex, the very selfish lovemaking.

 

[elgat0verde]

I'd stay and try to be a good dad, see them every time I can and treat them like I treat my children.

Actually, I am in that situation with my ex-wife and still work on being a good example to my kids, it's all we can really do

 

[Ronald Zeeman]

I have a cousin who was given up for adoption, over 60 years ago. Mother left came to Canada did not want my grandfather to know she was pregnant. I do not think his natural father even knew his mother was pregnant. So I would not be that judgmental, All guys are ass's is a bit strong, no birth control then. Takes two to make mistake. Woman being Paradyme's of virtue, they are human like the rest of us.

 

[lovely_darlingprettybaby]

Any chance you could have a boy, or are your hypothetical kids always girls?

I wish like anything I could have a baby girl. I would love to have a daughter and a best friend.
But I struggle to connect in relationships because of trauma and other issues.
If i had a son I would not mind but I love daughters to death

 

[Ella Spell]

I know women who have abandoned their children to the dads. It’s not always about men going AWOL.

 

[Ella Spell]

I wish like anything I could have a baby girl. I would love to have a daughter and a best friend.
But I struggle to connect in relationships because of trauma and other issues.
If i had a son I would not mind but I love daughters to death

Girls aren’t always close to their mothers. They can be even more of a handful to raise than sons. They might even be trans male. Birth gender doesn’t mean you’ll have an idyllic “best friend” relationship.

 

[lovely_darlingprettybaby]

I was never in a position to get anybody but my spouse pregnant. However, before marriage and knowing that birth control is not 100% effective, I know that I would take responsibility for any child I conceived. It is simple ethics.

I have known guys who got girls pregnant and abandoned them and I detest those man-children. What really puzzles me are that the tells are all there that this was within their character . . . the love bombing, the insistence on unprotected sex, the very selfish lovemaking.

I appreciate that but I struggle with lgbtq issues and also I would never judge anyone because I have complex ptsd and it is really hard to feel ready for true love when you have severe trauma like me, it can feel very daunting, scary and you can not want it and feel it to be suffocating.

 

[lovely_darlingprettybaby]

I know women who have abandoned their children to the dads. It’s not always about men going AWOL.

Yes horrible but also it may be difficult being a single mother but not something I would do.

 

[Ronald Zeeman]

I have noticed in the last few years the attitude to single fathers has really changed. The kids are being shared in more equitable custody arrangements.

 

[lovely_darlingprettybaby]

Girls aren’t always close to their mothers. They can be even more of a handful to raise than sons. They might even be trans male. Birth gender doesn’t mean you’ll have an idyllic “best friend” relationship.

Yes I know. But I do not think I would be very good with sons because I like femininity and I am very nurturing and boys can be a bit more active in terms of wanting to play trucks and in the sandpit and running around with handfuls of energy.
I am a very energetic person so if I had a boy, he would be full of energy probably.
I have never had children so I do not know, I have a big heart and am autistic so my daughter may be really kindhearted and naive.

 

[Ella Spell]

I appreciate that but I struggle with lgbtq issues and also I would never judge anyone because I have complex ptsd and it is really hard to feel ready for true love when you have severe trauma like me, it can feel very daunting, scary and you can not want it and feel it to be suffocating.

I have Complex PTSD too, and I’ve had strokes. I’ve single parented since my youngest was six months old. She’s now almost 27. She has ASD and PTSD too.

Do you mean you are LGBTQ? My daughter is gay but she can’t have kids anyway for medical reasons, so she might adopt with or without her girlfriend.

 

[Ronald Zeeman]

My mother had 5 sons; my wife's mother had 4 daughters. Together we had 2 sons, and now we have a granddaughter.

 

[Ella Spell]

I know how to tip the scales. ^

 

[Forest Cat]

I know women who have abandoned their children to the dads. It’s not always about men going AWOL.

My cousin raised his daughter alone because her mom just left her with him. She had some problems and she died a few years later. But he did take very good care of that girl, a very good dad. So it does happen that men are left alone with the kids too.