How do you react when the phone rings?

[SyAn]

I don't mind the phone ringing since my NT husband always answers it, which makes sense as nearly all the calls are for him anyway

At work I had no trouble answering the phone because I knew what it was going to be about (work), but at home . . .

When we were first married my husband used to say "It's xyz, do you want to talk with him/her?", in full hearing of the other person, so I couldn't say no. He had a hard time understanding why I didn't want to, but finally he gave up asking me

 

[AspieSam]

I'm not a fan of them either. I'm pretty sure it's an aspie HF ASD thing.

 

[AsheSkyler]

My stomach drops, then knots up. I try to calm down if it's a number I know, I put on my grumpy voice if it's a normal number I don't know, and I get shaking mad when it's those blasted scammers that have been calling me for over a year because the FCC is a lazy piece of crap. Then I lay the phone down, sometimes say dirty things in its direction when the dumb scammer decides to answer their robocall, or blast loud music into the phone. If I'm feeling particularly mean, I'll give a high-pitched scream, laugh maniacally/evilly, breathe heavy, or say something unhinged until they hang up. They're finally starting to call me about once a week or less instead of multiple times a day.

I was quite normal with phones before I got a job requiring me to work with them. I would even get excited to hear the phone ring. Customer service truly should be made a part of the penal system.

 

[indigogrl1979]

I have always ignored the phone. Took me 32 years to even get a cell phone.... which I use for other reasons than most people.

 

[Kirsty]

Quite sure now that it's an 'aspie thing' going by my own phone experiences and reading the thread! Always wondered what my problem was not answering the phone. I get all panicky. If there's an answer phone message, my heart thumps thinking "what's this? Who is this?" Etc... Ends up its nothing much to worry about in the end, but I can't help the way I feel.

 

[Etzelaire]

I answer it if I am in the mood or shut it down if I am not in the mood, and never answer ghost number or whatever it is called.

 

[Zjezdzaj]

I cringe.
If it's someone I know I'll answer, if it isn't I'll let it ring. I've got a nice ringtone, I like listening to it...

 

[Kirsty]

Lol. I have my mobile on silent all the time as I don't like sudden noise. Will phone people back if I need to.

 

[Cali Cat]

I am instantly annoyed because I don't want to stop whatever I am doing and work to carry on a conversation ... I have two adult kids and I usually enjoy talking to them for a few minutes but then, I start searching for the right thins to say or I am simply not interested in whatever they are talking about. ... There are a few people and forums that I enjoy and I like email because I can read and think and react before I write anything.

Like you, I am instantly annoyed for similar reasons. I might care about the person who is calling, but I'm busy at the moment. Also, I'm just not that interested to converse on the phone. For me, the phone is just a tool to make plans, confirm plans or deal with emergencies. It's not a social device in my mind. Plus, every time someone calls, it means I end up with one more thing to do. It's never just a conversation; it invariably involves a task I must perform.

When I am on the phone I usually play Solitaire for something to do.

When I'm on the phone, I usually smoke. So, phone calls are bad for my health too.

 

[Rudy Schmidt]

Plus, every time someone calls, it means I end up with one more thing to do. It's never just a conversation; it invariably involves a task I must perform.

This. Nobody ever phones me just to ask how I am, or to ask if there's anything they can do to help ME.

 

[OddmanJive]

I never answer the home phone unless my wife sounds annoyed when she asks me to get it. She'll usually answer it, which is great! I have never liked to answer the phone, but I can talk if there's no background sound like TV or Radio or my wife or kid. Very few people have my cell number, and I rarely answer it unless it's my wife. But I do like texting (I'm a late adopter) because I can respond in my own time. I'm new to this forum and relatively new to AS, so I'm still amazed every time I see something that rings true to my experience. Thank you all for posting!

 

[pushpin]

I don't really give out my number. I hate talking on the phone, unless it is with my brothers. I pick up the phone when my mom calls. I sometimes ignore my brothers' calls, but I always call them back. I don't really call other people back, unless it is an emergency. I may text back. I will call back if there is a point.

Just because I have a phone doesn't mean I have to answer it. This whole cell phone nonsense of having to always be readily available is too much. I miss the days of the annoying beeper sound or beeping someone a numeric code to tell them to call you when they have the time.

 

[garnetflower13]

My husband is all excited to have a new Smartphone. I just don't get it. Everywhere you look nowadays, people are bent over some object in their hand, intently pushing buttons while real life passes right on by.

 

[Soup]

The only reason there IS a home phone is that we need it for the fax machine in our home office. The ring tone is off at all times. My mobile rings, sometimes & I am mortified & astonished whenever it does. I think, "there's a horrible sound coming out of my black rectangle! It won't stop. I think it wants me to DO something...but what?" Eventually, it dawns on me that I am supposed to swipe & say HELLO. Why the heck would any reasonable Aspie DO such a thing? Few of us enjoy talking on the phone.

By the time I work it out, the noise as stopped. Whoever it was has either gone away. or has left a voice message (another thing I dislike). Of the few people who would contact me, they know to text, keep it clear & brief, & NEVER call. I often just shut off my ring tone as well as that creepy vibrating function altogether.

 

[Structrix]

I usually jump because getting calls is rare for me and also makes me very anxious. I wonder if its a social call or a business call and social calls that I don't initiate first are the worst.

 

[Progster]

For me the phone is a necessary evil - I use it for work or when I need to get in touch with someone for some specific reason, but not for socialising. If I don't recognise the number I don't pick up. If I'm busy with something I just let it ring, and call them back later.

 

[Keith]

I developed a habit of picking up the phone if it's an ID we don't recognize just to tell them not to call us again. I feel bad about that now because doing so lets the telemarketers know they have a good number.

 

[wyverary]

Expanding on what I previously wrote in this thread, I will say, I will answer the phone if, and ONLY if, the person calling me has been texting me and specifically requests that s/he telephone me (and vice versa)! Unless it's a very dear friend, and I happen to not be in the middle of something extremely important (okay, okay, unless I'm at work, there's rarely anything important going on), and it isn't as previously said planned, it will go right to voicemail, and it will be up to me whether an actual telephone conversation will ensue! Of course, if you're a bill collector, your message will just sit there in limbo, and good luck on getting that money that I shouldn't have had to pay in the first place!