i struggle to find meaning to all of what i go through.
is it just fufilment that gives meaning to life? good to counteract the bad, serine calms in the storm of emotions. to feel fuffilled with life, when not happy. to know the bad times always come to an end, through it all, persistance in the belife of life.
how to feel fuffilled? happinies, empathy, purpose? the only meaning life gives us is to feel good, exsistentailism melts down when emburced in the positive of the now, to feel happy is meaning to life.
are others happinies my own? can i live off of just others being happy. a man in africa may feel happy, yet i feel nothing. but a smile of my mothers face, i can conect to. the difference, is i care for my mother. her happinies, is mine as well.
but to live off of others being happy, when you are not. empathy turns away, and feeling for others positivity vanishes. you cant just live to make others happy, when it gives nothing back.
in life, there is always pain. rather waking up for work, or a scremeing kid, we cant avoid it. to hide from the things that cause us displessure, or live life? with good comes the bad.
with so much neggativity we must endure in this world, how to we keep afloat. meaning to the pain. sometihing we can look to for strength in persistance. a goal, a purpose. an athelete ednurew the regimented tourment of training to win a medal. we can endure the scremeing kids, to raise them. because the pain will be worth it in the end.
to live without a purpose, gives no meaning fo pain. no arguments for persistance. life devolves into meaningless endurance for the sake of fighting, with nothing to fight for.
finding a purpose, finding fuffilment, finding sympathy. these are all things that i struggle with. my ability to live for the sake of simply living is faltering. a life devolved into small steps in happinies, large gains in neggativity, and no meaning to it.
i have no choice but to persist. maybe meaning will cone with time