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What's your excuse?

What has been will be again,
what has been done will be done again;
there is nothing new under the sun.

Why don't you make some cookies for me?
 
Because knowledge is power, once you have it, no one can ever take it away from you.
Why was the trunk of the car suspiciously tied closed with red ribbon?
 
She was actually talking about coating rollers. It's apparently time to paint.

Why is this Pinot Noir so...the same as the last Pinot Noir?
 
Well, the name hasn't changed either, so...

Why won't my friend let me give a much-needed apology to her brother?
 
Because she thinks your apology will involve horrible interpretive dance to the sounds of Simon Le Bon a cappella.

Why are there Band-Aids on my left hand?
 
If you are like me, you are right-handed and cannot hold a pencil in your left hand. Let's just say... you tried to hold a pencil with your left hand.

Why did I waste so much time reading City Of The Falling Sky?
 
Because you decided that watching Chicken Little would be a waste of time.

Who wants to be my passport reference?
 
If you think we're all about to volunteer, think again.

Why am I having trouble coming up with April Fools jokes?
 
Because all the good ones have been taken.

Why was there so much work to do today?
 
Because it was all assigned at the beginning of March and had to be done by the end of March, and you procrastinated.

How did an essay about how miserable my life was at one point, make my life miserable in the long run
 
April Fools! It's a trick glass. It's like trick candles. You drink the wine, it reappears.

Why am I not going on the field trip to Hershey Park in May?
 
They don't want you making jokes about the route to get there.

Why does Rita MacNeil think I can get pregnant?
 
At one point you wore a miner's helmet to a baby shower.

Why can't the local kids understand that using a toboggan on my garage roof will result in serious injuries?
 
They've never actually tried to sled on your garage, and they're very curious.

Why did so many people order 572 pizzas from Paolas Pizza yesterday?
 
572 is the new 420.

Why are these cookies so awful on my digestive system?
 
Maybe because they're not actual cookies. They're the fake food that little kids play with.

Why won't google docs open?
 
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