Robby
Well-Known Member
I had an aunt who I was extremely close with she passed away a few years ago & I've had a very hard time with it. I lost my grandma when I was very young so she sort of took the place of that for me she was always there for me growing up sent me a card every birthday and christmas, always came and visited, she heard me out when I was having trouble and was just always there. She didn't care about my sexual orientation either she just loved me unconditionally. As a id she bought be toys, presents, but more importantly she was like a motivation for me just knowing she was around was a huge comfort to me and now she's dead And I knew I could tell her anything and it would go no farther. Nothing's been more painful than losing her.She's buried about 2 hours away from me unfortunately so I can't go visit her gravesite as often as I'd like. I'm having dreams about her, and feel her presence around me a lot. I hear her voice and her laugh in my head. But I can't call her or go see her and it really hurts. How do you deal with grief like this? My therapist told me to writer her a letter but I was afraid it would upset me too much. I almost feel like if I started crying I wouldn't be able to stop so I don't let myself. I didn't get to see her as much as I wished during her last few years, although I was able to spend time with her a couple of days before she died. I was a pallbearer at her funeral I miss her so bad. I feel stuck with this grief & missing her & know she wouldn't want me to feel so sad but I can't help it I just miss her so bad it hurts sometimes. I feel all alone in the world, when it comes right down to it, nobody gives a crap about you but family. And she was really about all I had. I almost feel like it'd be easier if I lived closer to where she's buried because I could pay my respects more often but I just feel lonely now without her.