I've started to examine how experiences affect me.
I've had problems with shutdown through sensory over load the last few weeks without giving myself enough recovery time, whichever dragged it out over nearly two weeks on and off.
The way I experience overload and shutdown is that I first feel a slight numbness. Its hard to say exactly where, but the feeling of numbness creeps into my existence at first at the peripheries. It's not yet starting to affect anything, and now is the time to stop what ever is causing the over load if I can.
The next thing I start to notice is a lack of spontaneous thought, and response to questions. I may get asked a question but my mind is blank. I often used to answer in a panic and talk nonsense in this stage, but now I try to talk as little as I can, and try to get out quickly. It's harder now to exit conversations, and I might stand their numb, and getting worse while people talk, wondering how to end this.
If it continues, I find my speech getting difficult. It's uncomfortable to speak, and I stumble over words. My vision is affected, and my experience closes in. It feels like my senses are retreating back to a safe and protected core, in a similar way to your blood retreats as you get cold.
I'm now getting quite clumsy, and may knock into wall corners and desks. My only desire now is retreat to solitude and quiet.
If I have to speak, and perform, I can often get my attention out again, but there is a cost. If I force myself, I can experience a stage which feels like the start of a migraine, but without the headache. It feels bad, and I feel strung out and a little agitated, whereas the shutdown itself does not feel bad if I can get solitude, its mostly just extremely inconvenient.
It takes time to recover, and when it's got bad, it's usually days or weeks before it completely recedes.
I also notice much more fragility of mood. Strops and depressions are just around the corner, and take me by surprise. I don't have the presence of mind to handle them well.
Factors that add to shutdown from overload.
Loud and sudden noises, especially shouting, screaming, clanking.
Constant noise.
360 degree movement like motorway traffic, large crowds.
Meetings and social events. The more people the faster the onset. Also meeting intensity affects it.
Stress.
Bitty tasks and interuptions when working.
Factors that help relieve shutdown.
Enjoyable, large and immersive tasks. Web design really helps me.
Long bath with music on headphones.
Music.
Being in nature.
Simple, non cluttered environment.
Peace and quiet.
Video games.
Anything that removes noise, and closes down the experience to a smaller point, like a video game does.
Can you relate to any of that?
I've had problems with shutdown through sensory over load the last few weeks without giving myself enough recovery time, whichever dragged it out over nearly two weeks on and off.
The way I experience overload and shutdown is that I first feel a slight numbness. Its hard to say exactly where, but the feeling of numbness creeps into my existence at first at the peripheries. It's not yet starting to affect anything, and now is the time to stop what ever is causing the over load if I can.
The next thing I start to notice is a lack of spontaneous thought, and response to questions. I may get asked a question but my mind is blank. I often used to answer in a panic and talk nonsense in this stage, but now I try to talk as little as I can, and try to get out quickly. It's harder now to exit conversations, and I might stand their numb, and getting worse while people talk, wondering how to end this.
If it continues, I find my speech getting difficult. It's uncomfortable to speak, and I stumble over words. My vision is affected, and my experience closes in. It feels like my senses are retreating back to a safe and protected core, in a similar way to your blood retreats as you get cold.
I'm now getting quite clumsy, and may knock into wall corners and desks. My only desire now is retreat to solitude and quiet.
If I have to speak, and perform, I can often get my attention out again, but there is a cost. If I force myself, I can experience a stage which feels like the start of a migraine, but without the headache. It feels bad, and I feel strung out and a little agitated, whereas the shutdown itself does not feel bad if I can get solitude, its mostly just extremely inconvenient.
It takes time to recover, and when it's got bad, it's usually days or weeks before it completely recedes.
I also notice much more fragility of mood. Strops and depressions are just around the corner, and take me by surprise. I don't have the presence of mind to handle them well.
Factors that add to shutdown from overload.
Loud and sudden noises, especially shouting, screaming, clanking.
Constant noise.
360 degree movement like motorway traffic, large crowds.
Meetings and social events. The more people the faster the onset. Also meeting intensity affects it.
Stress.
Bitty tasks and interuptions when working.
Factors that help relieve shutdown.
Enjoyable, large and immersive tasks. Web design really helps me.
Long bath with music on headphones.
Music.
Being in nature.
Simple, non cluttered environment.
Peace and quiet.
Video games.
Anything that removes noise, and closes down the experience to a smaller point, like a video game does.
Can you relate to any of that?
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