What is your one worst fear?

[shaunaxaconda]

Definitely being burned alive/kidnapped and tortured last but not least and irrational but possible deep sea diving and dying at the hands or should I say tentacles of a giant octopus.

 

[ccjb1234]

I always fear I will die by being stabbed in the spine with an axe as I go down the stairs. Since I was a kid if it's late at night or dark out I run down the stairs to avoid it happening...so rational! Hahaha

 

[Flower44590]

I have lots of fears. The one that affects my life the most is being in a terrible car wreck. I am AWFUL to have a passenger because I am more anxious than anyone could ever imagine. All I know is physics says if the car stops I keep going. Going at any mph toward anything is going to hurt.

 

[NLDer]

Cheerful thread haha.

But really, it makes sense to comment on this, because I feel that my worst fear is entirely related to my diagnosis, though I am not exactly sure how, I feel that they are inexricably intertwined and personally, I am very surprised it is not on anyone else's list.

Personally, other than the death or suffering of loved ones, which is of course close to the top of the list.....I think the ONLY thing really worth fearing and my single greatest fear...is that of living an unfulfilled life.

We all die, this is inevitable, so being scared of death makes no sense to me.

But as they say, every man dies, but not every man really lives.

I feel that I have not truly lived yet, in fact, I haven't even come close, and that it would be a tragedy for me to pass before I get to REALLY experience the rich experiences of life like falling in love, and most of all, feeling a TRUE understanding of myself and achieving peace of mind.

It's kind of messed up, but I think of life like a video game:

I think you can win life, or lose life...and that in the end, it's pretty simple if you look at someone's life to figure out if they won or lost:

If someone faced all their biggest fears, helped other people when they could, was generous when they could be, enjoyed themselves in life, and generally achieved a number of instances in their life where they felt TRULY at peace...even if these moments only last mere minutes.....that THIS PERSON WON LIFE.

However:

If someone does not face their fears, or enough of their fears, does not experience true feeling of peace of mind due to not being open enough to their surroundings and never coming to truly understand themselves, and has been greedy and generally not helped others when they could......that this person will die unfullfilled and miserable and they clearly "lost the game of life".

I can't imagine anything more terrifying than that.

But on the other hand...I personally believe that if I do enough things in my life that have to do with confronting my fears, have enough moments of inner peace, experience enough love and exciting experiences, and try my best to be there for those close to me, that it's quite possible that I will be able to point out ONE PARTICULAR DAY ON WHICH I WILL "WIN" AT THE GAME OF LIFE.

I think I know people who have already "won" although they may not personally feel that way.

i want to "win" at life, and have a moment of clarity where I can say to myself "you know what, no matter WHAT else happens from now on...I faced my fears, I loved, I gave, I tried...and I am at peace...so nothing else matters"....and then I can raise my arms triumphantly and say "I WON!!!"

Dramatic....but yeah...that's how I feel....

 

[Cerulean]

Can I just say the stupidest thing I've ever been afraid of-
A couple months ago my boyfriend told me as we were falling asleep about a conspiracy/rumor/urban legend involving the death and replacement of Beatle Paul McCartney in the '60s. I'd never heard that but always found the Beatles creepy. I remember panicking that he wasn't a real person, that he was empty and part of him was missing. Since then I've been a little bit afraid of the Beatles.

 

[Ereth]

Looks like my number one fear is coming true. Sort of.

EDIT: Shortly after I posted this, the dark cloud that's been hanging over my life lately dissipated. I think I'll be okay now.

 

[Judge]

Looks like my number one fear is coming true. Sort of.

That doesn't sound good. Take care....of course if you want to talk, we're here for you.

I seem to have to deal with my greatest fear almost every week...it's no fun.

 

[Grumpy Cat]

Cheerful thread haha.

But really, it makes sense to comment on this, because I feel that my worst fear is entirely related to my diagnosis, though I am not exactly sure how, I feel that they are inexricably intertwined and personally, I am very surprised it is not on anyone else's list.

Personally, other than the death or suffering of loved ones, which is of course close to the top of the list.....I think the ONLY thing really worth fearing and my single greatest fear...is that of living an unfulfilled life.

We all die, this is inevitable, so being scared of death makes no sense to me.

But as they say, every man dies, but not every man really lives.

I feel that I have not truly lived yet, in fact, I haven't even come close, and that it would be a tragedy for me to pass before I get to REALLY experience the rich experiences of life like falling in love, and most of all, feeling a TRUE understanding of myself and achieving peace of mind.

It's kind of messed up, but I think of life like a video game:

I think you can win life, or lose life...and that in the end, it's pretty simple if you look at someone's life to figure out if they won or lost:

If someone faced all their biggest fears, helped other people when they could, was generous when they could be, enjoyed themselves in life, and generally achieved a number of instances in their life where they felt TRULY at peace...even if these moments only last mere minutes.....that THIS PERSON WON LIFE.

However:

If someone does not face their fears, or enough of their fears, does not experience true feeling of peace of mind due to not being open enough to their surroundings and never coming to truly understand themselves, and has been greedy and generally not helped others when they could......that this person will die unfullfilled and miserable and they clearly "lost the game of life".

I can't imagine anything more terrifying than that.

But on the other hand...I personally believe that if I do enough things in my life that have to do with confronting my fears, have enough moments of inner peace, experience enough love and exciting experiences, and try my best to be there for those close to me, that it's quite possible that I will be able to point out ONE PARTICULAR DAY ON WHICH I WILL "WIN" AT THE GAME OF LIFE.

I think I know people who have already "won" although they may not personally feel that way.

i want to "win" at life, and have a moment of clarity where I can say to myself "you know what, no matter WHAT else happens from now on...I faced my fears, I loved, I gave, I tried...and I am at peace...so nothing else matters"....and then I can raise my arms triumphantly and say "I WON!!!"

Dramatic....but yeah...that's how I feel....

That's a very interesting way to think about life. My thing, though, is that everything doesn't always happen the way a person wants it to. Take the love thing for instance. I still have not found true love and if I never do, am I supposed to just settle on someone and believe its true love or never have love and go to my grave believing I didn't live a fulfilling life? I don't think life is that black and white. A person has control over some things, but I don't believe everything. At one moment you may think you have found peace and everything in life is happening just like you want it to, then something happens unexpected and takes your life in a totally different direction and you have to come up with a backup plan. I believe we are all here for a reason and its our job to find that reason. We all have special gifts and its up to us how we choose to use those gifts - to keep them for ourselves or to help others. Honestly, most of the time I don't know why any of us are here. I never really feel at peace. I think of life as a job with a few extra "perks" of fun when possible.

 

[NLDer]

That's a very interesting way to think about life. My thing, though, is that everything doesn't always happen the way a person wants it to. Take the love thing for instance. I still have not found true love and if I never do, am I supposed to just settle on someone and believe its true love or never have love and go to my grave believing I didn't live a fulfilling life? I don't think life is that black and white. A person has control over some things, but I don't believe everything. At one moment you may think you have found peace and everything in life is happening just like you want it to, then something happens unexpected and takes your life in a totally different direction and you have to come up with a backup plan. I believe we are all here for a reason and its our job to find that reason. We all have special gifts and its up to us how we choose to use those gifts - to keep them for ourselves or to help others. Honestly, most of the time I don't know why any of us are here. I never really feel at peace. I think of life as a job with a few extra "perks" of fun when possible.

Yeah, that's how most people think of life and probably how I "am supposed" to think about life, and I know life isn't all black and white. That's one problem I have with my NLD, "black and white, all or nothing" thinking. I'm very much a person of extremes in almost every way and it's a problem. But on the love thing, I don't necessarily think finding a person you are truly in love with is even necessary to find peace of mind, though really, I am not at all sure what is truly necessary to achieve it and peace of mind is my greatest goal. It's true that we might think we've found peace and then the next minute realize we haven't.

But for me, it always comes down to imagining myself on my death bed, and how I'd feel knowing it's all about to be over. It's about the most terrifying situation one can imagine if you HAVEN'T truly found some peace in your life, but if you HAVE, then death should be nothing to truly fear.

So I think that there will be those of us who, when that time inevitably comes, will be able to look back at our lives and say "you know what, that was a pretty great life...sure, it had it's ups and downs, a lot of bad times, but overall, in the end, I feel I achieved my main goals, and that I know why I was put here, that I experienced the things a human is really supposed to experience, and I faced my fears, and no one else should ask for more." If you feel that way on your death bed then IMO you should be able to pass away without regrets regardless of if there's an after life.

But to be there thinking "I should have done this or that" or "I never really faced my fears"....thats the worst thing I can imagine. It's so terrifying that frankly I can't type more about it now and it's the kind of thing that SHOULD make a person want to try so much harder in life, but whenever I do think about it I usually just start to freeze up.

Definitely a complicated topic for sure...

 

[wyverary]

Can I just say the stupidest thing I've ever been afraid of-
A couple months ago my boyfriend told me as we were falling asleep about a conspiracy/rumor/urban legend involving the death and replacement of Beatle Paul McCartney in the '60s. I'd never heard that but always found the Beatles creepy. I remember panicking that he wasn't a real person, that he was empty and part of him was missing. Since then I've been a little bit afraid of the Beatles.

Apparently there's some sort of allusion to it in the songs I Am the Walrus and Glass Onion. I'm not really up to date on Beatles history, though.

 

[Cerulean]

Apparently there's some sort of allusion to it in the songs I Am the Walrus and Glass Onion. I'm not really up to date on Beatles history, though.

I'm not familiar with the onion one but he did tell me about the walrus song. Freaked me the hell out! haha

 

[Raggerty]

With me it's my inner being becoming exposed.
Being laughed at.
Ridiculed.

 

[KassieMac]

Can I just say the stupidest thing I've ever been afraid of-
A couple months ago my boyfriend told me as we were falling asleep about a conspiracy/rumor/urban legend involving the death and replacement of Beatle Paul McCartney in the '60s. I'd never heard that but always found the Beatles creepy. I remember panicking that he wasn't a real person, that he was empty and part of him was missing. Since then I've been a little bit afraid of the Beatles.

That's been going around a very long time ... I first heard of it in the 80s. I wouldn't be surprised if The Beatles themselves intentionally planted the hidden details that people use as proof, it seems like the type of thing they would find funny ... kind of a test to see who's paying attention. It's common practice now, any well-done movie or TV show has 'easter eggs' ... maybe The Beatles were just way ahead of their time.

 

[ExplosiveTMT]

I'm afraid of having no one who can relate to what I've had to deal with; being without any form of help when I need it most....but I guess that isn't something to be afraid of anymore.

 

[wyverary]

Being eaten alive by a swarm of the thumb-sized hornets that have previously infested my residence.

 

[Meistersinger]

I still have this nightmare occasionally. When I was in high school, I was beat up by 2 girl gangs, which tried to get their hands down my pants. While I was taking Viibryd, I would repeatedly have this same dream where these same gangs not only beat me up, but would lop off my hands, legs, and head before putting their hands down my pants.


Never teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time, and annoys the pig.

 

[Mission Before Waking]

sickness and depression equally. No arguments, no doubt!

 

[CassieR]

Super scared of being in the dark. More of when I'm either alone, outside, or in closed places. Or even just walking to the bathroom in the middle of the night. I get this weird paranoia that someone is out to get me.


-CR

 

[Judge]

Super scared of being in the dark. More of when I'm either alone, outside, or in closed places. Or even just walking to the bathroom in the middle of the night. I get this weird paranoia that someone is out to get me.


-CR

With me it's an unlocked door or window. But then that's also one of my OCD rituals.

 

[CassieR]

Sometimes when I'm walking down to my room, I hear a noise and I almost scream and I run down to my room. I just get SO deadly scared.


-CR