Musical Talent?

[total-recoil]

I'm still baffled as to whether I have a degree of it (musical talent, ability). Let's be clear as far as singing goes, I fall face down flat. I can't and never will be able to sing (genetic, I guess). However, what I'm now trying to do is write riffs, melodies, songs and whatever. At the same time, I'm trying to figure out if I'm any good at it.
The main thing I decided to do was to keep up as normal with my other interests (radio electronics and so on). I mean, music is a funny and very competitive business with many shades of grey. I've even taken to analysing it deeply. Every time I watch a movie, I often hear background music in the score - often seems to be some sort of easy listening material composed by an unheard of musician, but picked for a particular movie scene. Anyway, I try to get out the keyboard when I'm in the mood and have promised myself not to get too bogged down and let time decide as to whether I'll continue to improve.
I found out I appear to be able to write music but I also found out not everyone used the same system and you have to find the way that works for you. Apparently I'm one of those people who works back to front. I mean, the usual approach is to write the song first and then strum the background chords and so on. Some people just get the melody in their head first. I tend to have no song at all on the horizon when I work on my background bass and chord sequences. i do the riffs first and then try to make a song fit to the actual riff. I'm told The Rolling Stones always did it that way - first get a good riff and then sing along till it sounds right.
By the way, anyone agree or feel that often something that is childlishly simple may sound better than a complicated bit of piano playing? I often find I can play a few notes on piano and it sounds dull. Use an echoe and deep synth sound with lots of reverb and suddenly it sounds O.K. This is a concept I have difficulty with as I always tend to think complex but really what I seem to be picking up is no amazing instrumental skill is required to make harmony sound good. Mixing, timing and choice of combined sounds is often very effective.
Any other musician wannabes here on Aspie Central?

 

[smith2267]

I am teaching myself to play guitar, and I often wonder whether I have any talent.

 

[Daniel]

Yes, I would have to call myself a musician wannabe! I want to do it, but I realize now that Asperger's has been getting in the way. I love playing instruments, writing songs/music and recording/producing it, but I've always been frustrated and disappointed with the experience of making music with and for other people.

I agree - there are lots of different ways to come up with tunes! The more I learned about music, the more "complete" the inspiration would be when I had a song idea. Sometimes I would get a complete song idea, with melody/harmony/sections/transitions/overall length/arrangement conceived at once. I started out playing the drums, and I've written stuff just because I wanted to hear something with a particular beat. I have some song ideas that have been stuck in my head since I was ten years old. I can only hope other people find them as sticky!

Yes - childishly simple can often trump complexity. I think the simplicity/complexity duality is a bit of a red herring, though if you're thinking about whether or not something will click with a particular audience (sorry, I went to school for marketing), you've got to know what will fly with them. I guess I'm saying simple/complex usually has little to do with good/bad.

I love the bit at the beginning of Amadeus where Salieri asks the priest(?) if he remembers one of his old popular tunes, and the guy doesn't, but when Salieri plays Mozart's Overture from The Marriage of Figaro (correct me if that's not what it is), the priest can instantly and completely recall the more complex, but ultimately better melody.

You can hear some of my recordings at this site: https://sites.google.com/site/danielbutterfieldmusic/.

My natural tendency is to go way overboard with overdubbing. Everything on there is me playing or singing. The next stuff I do will be more focused and simple.

 

[SallySlips]

I played the trombone in middle school and high school, and I was #1 in my section.

I also am pretty good at singing, but I won't do it in front of anyone but my dogs.

 

[Douglas_MacNeill]

I'm still baffled as to whether I have a degree of it (musical talent, ability). Let's be clear as far as singing goes, I fall face down flat. I can't and never will be able to sing (genetic, I guess). However, what I'm now trying to do is write riffs, melodies, songs and whatever. At the same time, I'm trying to figure out if I'm any good at it.
The main thing I decided to do was to keep up as normal with my other interests (radio electronics and so on). I mean, music is a funny and very competitive business with many shades of grey. I've even taken to analysing it deeply. Every time I watch a movie, I often hear background music in the score - often seems to be some sort of easy listening material composed by an unheard of musician, but picked for a particular movie scene. Anyway, I try to get out the keyboard when I'm in the mood and have promised myself not to get too bogged down and let time decide as to whether I'll continue to improve.
I found out I appear to be able to write music but I also found out not everyone used the same system and you have to find the way that works for you. Apparently I'm one of those people who works back to front. I mean, the usual approach is to write the song first and then strum the background chords and so on. Some people just get the melody in their head first. I tend to have no song at all on the horizon when I work on my background bass and chord sequences. i do the riffs first and then try to make a song fit to the actual riff. I'm told The Rolling Stones always did it that way - first get a good riff and then sing along till it sounds right.
By the way, anyone agree or feel that often something that is childlishly simple may sound better than a complicated bit of piano playing? I often find I can play a few notes on piano and it sounds dull. Use an echoe and deep synth sound with lots of reverb and suddenly it sounds O.K. This is a concept I have difficulty with as I always tend to think complex but really what I seem to be picking up is no amazing instrumental skill is required to make harmony sound good. Mixing, timing and choice of combined sounds is often very effective.
Any other musician wannabes here on Aspie Central?

I'm in my sixth year as a second tenor in a local choir.
Talentwise: I usually find the handle on a new piece of music sooner
than most of my colleagues in choir, if that suggests talent.
Instrumentally: I played clarinet in concert band from grades 5-10,
then bass clarinet in grades 11 and 12. Haven't touched either of them since.
As for the wannabe part: My craziest dream of all would be to
try to learn how to play the drum set, just once.

 

[smith2267]

I can hit notes accurately when singing, especially if I have an instrument behind me. But my voice is unremarkable.
Since I have started fooling with the guitar I am starting to be able to think in chords instead of just notes.
I hate performing in front of people.

 

[King_Oni]

I don't know if wannabe is the right term though. If a wannabe is someone who doesn't make a living from being a musician... then yes, I fit that category, however, I don't neccesarily aspire that path.

That being said; I dabble around in music creation and recording from time to time. Right now I'm totally uninspired so I'm not doing a whole lot.

In the past I've been in a few bands. Primarily as a vocalist... I use the term vocalist, not singer, since sometimes I think metal isn't really that much of a "singy" style. I wrote lyrics and contributed a bit with ideas for new songs without me being able to play guitar or any instrument at all. Further down the line I ended up stringing up small sequences like intro's for live shows.

Then, after that stint got cut short I ended up looking for people for a new band where I had a bit more creative control. Still was the vocalist, lyricist, but did an awful lot of sample-based electronics as well. On a side I'd pick up on some songwriting innerworkings. Got myself a little midi-controller so I could eventually sample and record parts I'd play on my computer. Sample them, chop them up.

Eventually I picked up a guitar and got more active in writing stuff myself.

Up to this day I'm not really one that can read notes from the get go. Nor can I blindly play a guitar at a fast pace. I'm to clumsy for that... I can't even remember a few sections after one another, hence I work on my music in my own way. I write down a lot and work digitally most. If I really need to record a guitar part I'm best looking at a transcribed part of what I previously wrote down and play it off the screen a few times until I get it right.

I have a terrible hearing if it comes to detecting notes. I can hear if something it's not a clear note, but don't ask me if it's an A, B or even an F sharp. I have no clue. I don't register that. I've tried numerous times. That being said I do have a good understanding of music theory, harmonics, and whatever you can employ in writing music. I'm just not a practical musician.

Technically, I can program anything that creates music, ranging from sequencers to drum computers up to the latest digital VST's... and that's what I use mostly. I've resorted to using Guitar pro a lot for laying down the basics of guitarriffs, drum tracks and the like as well.

Producing and mastering, I've been told I'm not that bad at either, since I've been asked to do so in the past for demos of other people. Guess I'm not totally useless. It's just that making it a viable business is a different deal.

I've dabbled a bit into circuitbending as well and I'm still building (when I find motivation for it) my own Theremin... which clearly needs to be tuned by a non-note deaf person, lol. But I guess I can hook that up to a guitar tuner and figure something out.

But all things considered, generally speaking people enjoy it when I do something music related, so I guess i'm not that terrible at it. Or all those people just have awful taste.

Below in my signature is a link to my soundcloud. It's some stuff I did in the past 2 years... which is a minimal amount for someone who's "properties" consists of half musical instruments.

A related note; I once applied for a course in university for sound design. Unfortunatly being able to detect notes by hearing (so called Solfege exam) and it being a big part of the exam, besides having a portfolio to get accepted there (and not having inspiration to create anything), made me reconsider it. Well.. it being 200 miles up north and not being able to move cause of tight finances is another reason.

 

[anne.bc]

I am a music performance major in college with a bassoon emphasis. I have been playing bassoon since I was 12. :dance:
Music is my passion and my greatest obsession. I listen to Pandora radio on my phone whenever I can to block out the people I can't stand, and just my frustrations in general.
I also have perfect pitch. I wasn't born that way, but as soon as I recognized pitch in my head, I would then teach myself ways to remember each one. An A is the standard tuning pitch for an orchestra. A B flat is the standard tuning pitch for a wind ensemble. F is the starting note of the first verse of Nsync's "God Must Have Spent A Little More Time On You". Stuff like that.

 

[total-recoil]

I tried to hear it on my mobile phone but it was slow to load and so far haven't been able to check it out. And on this P.C. I'd need headphones, I think (am in a library).
I've been sometimes playing my own music at work but saying nothing. Just switching on a mobile recording, curious as to what impact it might have. One of the managers (a young guy) heard it and looked baffled somehow but nobody knows it's my own stuff. I'm just curious as to what impression it makes (good or bad) but don't want to go playing my stuff and asking for opinions. My goal is really to do my own thing and not try to fit into what's popular. A lot of the musicians who influence me are not mainstream, such as Pat Metheny. Also, progressive jazz isn't mainstream and progressive jazz is what partly influences me as it's liberal and open to experimentation and improvisation. So, I'm a free bird and try to make a sound that's from within and expressing myself and my own taste in harmony.
P.S. One group I really follow and like is Scritty Politti from the eighties:
Scritti Politti - Brushed With Oil, Dusted With Powder - YouTube
At the moment where I'm intrigued is I'm writing more riffs and harmonies but still don't know if other people would relate to it. At some point I may need to upload some of it online (as I progress).
I haven't ceased being involved in my other special interests as i want to just give time to music and see how I develop. It may remian a simple hobby or I may find I can progress further and even form a group or something.

I don't know if wannabe is the right term though. If a wannabe is someone who doesn't make a living from being a musician... then yes, I fit that category, however, I don't neccesarily aspire that path.

That being said; I dabble around in music creation and recording from time to time. Right now I'm totally uninspired so I'm not doing a whole lot.

In the past I've been in a few bands. Primarily as a vocalist... I use the term vocalist, not singer, since sometimes I think metal isn't really that much of a "singy" style. I wrote lyrics and contributed a bit with ideas for new songs without me being able to play guitar or any instrument at all. Further down the line I ended up stringing up small sequences like intro's for live shows.

Then, after that stint got cut short I ended up looking for people for a new band where I had a bit more creative control. Still was the vocalist, lyricist, but did an awful lot of sample-based electronics as well. On a side I'd pick up on some songwriting innerworkings. Got myself a little midi-controller so I could eventually sample and record parts I'd play on my computer. Sample them, chop them up.

Eventually I picked up a guitar and got more active in writing stuff myself.

Up to this day I'm not really one that can read notes from the get go. Nor can I blindly play a guitar at a fast pace. I'm to clumsy for that... I can't even remember a few sections after one another, hence I work on my music in my own way. I write down a lot and work digitally most. If I really need to record a guitar part I'm best looking at a transcribed part of what I previously wrote down and play it off the screen a few times until I get it right.

I have a terrible hearing if it comes to detecting notes. I can hear if something it's not a clear note, but don't ask me if it's an A, B or even an F sharp. I have no clue. I don't register that. I've tried numerous times. That being said I do have a good understanding of music theory, harmonics, and whatever you can employ in writing music. I'm just not a practical musician.

Technically, I can program anything that creates music, ranging from sequencers to drum computers up to the latest digital VST's... and that's what I use mostly. I've resorted to using Guitar pro a lot for laying down the basics of guitarriffs, drum tracks and the like as well.

Producing and mastering, I've been told I'm not that bad at either, since I've been asked to do so in the past for demos of other people. Guess I'm not totally useless. It's just that making it a viable business is a different deal.

I've dabbled a bit into circuitbending as well and I'm still building (when I find motivation for it) my own Theremin... which clearly needs to be tuned by a non-note deaf person, lol. But I guess I can hook that up to a guitar tuner and figure something out.

But all things considered, generally speaking people enjoy it when I do something music related, so I guess i'm not that terrible at it. Or all those people just have awful taste.

Below in my signature is a link to my soundcloud. It's some stuff I did in the past 2 years... which is a minimal amount for someone who's "properties" consists of half musical instruments.

A related note; I once applied for a course in university for sound design. Unfortunatly being able to detect notes by hearing (so called Solfege exam) and it being a big part of the exam, besides having a portfolio to get accepted there (and not having inspiration to create anything), made me reconsider it. Well.. it being 200 miles up north and not being able to move cause of tight finances is another reason.

 

[Daniel]

I also have perfect pitch. I wasn't born that way, but as soon as I recognized pitch in my head, I would then teach myself ways to remember each one. An A is the standard tuning pitch for an orchestra. A B flat is the standard tuning pitch for a wind ensemble. F is the starting note of the first verse of Nsync's "God Must Have Spent A Little More Time On You". Stuff like that.

I think my perfect pitch is like yours! I could always hear the "right" notes, but once I started learning to play instruments, I started being able to identify them by mentally referring to familiar examples of the pitches. I can now sing middle C by just thinking of the words "middle C".

I also have a bunch of songs in my head whose keys I use to quickly identify notes:
C - "I Am a Rock" by Simon & Garfunkel
D - Beethoven's 9th Symphony
E - "On the Road Again" by Canned Heat
F# - "No Sugar Tonight" by The Guess Who
G - "Wasn't Born to Follow" by The Byrds
A - "(It's Been) Too Long" by Quicksilver Messenger Service
Bb - "Christine's Tune" by The Flying Burrito Brothers

I'm pretty sure it's the innate ability to recognize pitches that makes the difference between "having" perfect pitch and not having it. It's easy enough to learn the names of the notes when you can hear them, but there are very few people who can identify them without external reference. I had this argument with someone once who tried to name off notes like I could.

Makes me wish I had taken up the piano when I was an infant, during those years when your brain is ripe for learning language!

 

[wyverary]

I am what I like to call a "recovering musician," in that I studied it very intensely in high school and college, but then it all became too much to handle and I quit. I tried picking up my instrument a couple of times in the past few year, and every time I do I remember immediately why I stopped; I'm thinking of selling it.

I have perfect pitch as well, and I agree, I think it's something you might have an innate ability for, but still have to learn a bit. I developed it quite early on, when I was 10 or 11 or so, and the fact that I was so young probably helped.

 

[Daniel]

I am what I like to call a "recovering musician," in that I studied it very intensely in high school and college, but then it all became too much to handle and I quit. I tried picking up my instrument a couple of times in the past few year, and every time I do I remember immediately why I stopped; I'm thinking of selling it.

I hear you--I've always been hesitant to do much with music because it was always something I did for personal pleasure, and I'm very protective of that. I hated having to have to answer to anyone else about my music that I made just for me.

Hey, thanks to everyone on this thread for introducing me to SoundCloud! I've got my channel set up now:
https://soundcloud.com/danielbutterfield

 

[total-recoil]

This is an issue I'm aware of and sometimes experience. Basically you're being a bit hard on yourself and, in the process, holding back your progress. It's not a pleasant feeling to pick up and instrument and then feel in your mind something isn't coming together so you just cease the activity. I think this happens when you (1) get too bogged down and (2) perhaps need to allow more patience. I mean, what came to my mind was my other special interest (electronics) requires patience and persistance and it doesn't just happen all in one go. Music is the same. You will have bad days when you feel negative. In such a case, try and do something else, don't get bogged down and come back to it another day.
All in all, it's good to be hard on yourself so the standard rises but beware of pulling yourself down too much on the bad days.

I am what I like to call a "recovering musician," in that I studied it very intensely in high school and college, but then it all became too much to handle and I quit. I tried picking up my instrument a couple of times in the past few year, and every time I do I remember immediately why I stopped; I'm thinking of selling it.

I have perfect pitch as well, and I agree, I think it's something you might have an innate ability for, but still have to learn a bit. I developed it quite early on, when I was 10 or 11 or so, and the fact that I was so young probably helped.

 

[total-recoil]

This is really the first time I began to analyse music logically. Not just analyse but question. A lot of people have talked about instrumental skill and perfect pitch but this is only an aspect of music. Suppose your instrumental skills are fairly basic and your hearing isn't perfect, that doesn't necessarily mean all the doors are closed. What intrigues me is I can set my synth on piano (which is good to do) and then string together a base and melody line. It may sound like someone tinkling a piano, not amazingly good or particularly bad. However, adding drums, reverb, sustain and alternative leads to piano and suddenly the sound is so much better. Even a simple 4 note progression can sound great. In fact, the more I listen to pro musicians and groups, the more often I hear quite simple riffs or melody or base lines.
Another vital point to bear in mind is so much commercial music today is crap. I hear it coming out of cars and basically despair. The good music is to be found elsewhere for sure with smaller fan bases in different circles altogether.
Many things to consider in fact. What floats your boat? Is it hard rock, blues, country, jazz, funk? Usually we find our own niche and I know mine isn't particularly rock, metal, traditional jazz or country. At this stage I think I connect with improvised based music - used to call it progressive jazz.
Musicians who I admired are Lennon, Mccartney, Brian Wilson, John Denver, Scritti Politti and in progressive jazz Stanly Clarke and Pat Metheny.

.

I hear you--I've always been hesitant to do much with music because it was always something I did for personal pleasure, and I'm very protective of that. I hated having to have to answer to anyone else about my music that I made just for me.

Hey, thanks to everyone on this thread for introducing me to SoundCloud! I've got my channel set up now:
https://soundcloud.com/danielbutterfield

 

[wyverary]

This is an issue I'm aware of and sometimes experience. Basically you're being a bit hard on yourself and, in the process, holding back your progress. It's not a pleasant feeling to pick up and instrument and then feel in your mind something isn't coming together so you just cease the activity. I think this happens when you (1) get too bogged down and (2) perhaps need to allow more patience. I mean, what came to my mind was my other special interest (electronics) requires patience and persistance and it doesn't just happen all in one go. Music is the same. You will have bad days when you feel negative. In such a case, try and do something else, don't get bogged down and come back to it another day.
All in all, it's good to be hard on yourself so the standard rises but beware of pulling yourself down too much on the bad days.

It goes much deeper than that. It's hard to explain concretely, but I was never more miserable than when I was playing, and my life has improved drastically since I gave it up completely. I hate when people suggest that I could enjoy it again if only I give it time and with a different attitude. That is not true. (Do those people say the same to their divorced friends?) I don't know what it is that makes people think that playing an instrument "should" be enjoyable; I get pleasure out of my ukulele and singing, and I have absolutely no reason to pick up something that I know will only make me miserable. I do not miss it and I do not need it.

 

[total-recoil]

Point taken. Years ago I started guitar lessons with a girl who taught classical guitar. It just didn't take off and I would get very nervous. All my attempts to get to grips with guitar have failed somehow. Yet most people always tell me I seem to be O.K. with keyboard and it comes more naturally to me.
I'm sure you'll figure out what's best for yourself and I agree you should do something else if an activity makes you feel unsatisfied.

It goes much deeper than that. It's hard to explain concretely, but I was never more miserable than when I was playing, and my life has improved drastically since I gave it up completely. I hate when people suggest that I could enjoy it again if only I give it time and with a different attitude. That is not true. (Do those people say the same to their divorced friends?) I don't know what it is that makes people think that playing an instrument "should" be enjoyable; I get pleasure out of my ukulele and singing, and I have absolutely no reason to pick up something that I know will only make me miserable. I do not miss it and I do not need it.

 

[Daniel]

A lot of people have talked about instrumental skill and perfect pitch but this is only an aspect of music. Suppose your instrumental skills are fairly basic and your hearing isn't perfect, that doesn't necessarily mean all the doors are closed. What intrigues me is I can set my synth on piano (which is good to do) and then string together a base and melody line. It may sound like someone tinkling a piano, not amazingly good or particularly bad. However, adding drums, reverb, sustain and alternative leads to piano and suddenly the sound is so much better. Even a simple 4 note progression can sound great. In fact, the more I listen to pro musicians and groups, the more often I hear quite simple riffs or melody or base lines.

You're absolutely right--you don't need instrumental skill, perfect pitch, a sense of rhythm, or any of that stuff to make music. One of the most valuable expressions to remember is K.I.S.S. -- "keep it simple, stupid!" Good-sounding production on a recording can make all the difference. Witness Lana Del Rey on record vs. her live appearance on SNL.

Joe Meek was one of the most innovative music producers of the 1960s, and the guy was tone-deaf, and didn't really have much of a sense of who was talented and who wasn't; he would recruit singers/musicians because they were "blokes he fancied."

 

[total-recoil]

Not everybody can play in time and accurately hear tones but I figure if you can at least do those basic things, there is some hope. I find I can pick out known melodies quite easily on keyboard. Some are very easy and others test me to the limit. My guess is I'm perhaps one of those people who really likes music but will need to work at it over time to gradually make progress.
As to instrumental skills, I think The Beatles were fairly average to begin with. Both John and Paul were self-taught on piano to the point they could get out a decent sound. Paul turned out to become a fantastic bass guitarist and George I'd say was a decent guitarist (although a far cry from Hendrix). As for Ringo there was a saying he was the Beatles' drummer but he wasn't the best drummer in the Beatles.
One other interesting point is with music I think there sometimes needs to be shared imput. I could put together a riff on synth and add bass and drums and someone else could point out a subtle chord change or diversion could make the whole thing come together and that did happen with groups.
Anyway to the point: A lot of people here clearly doing in depth instrumental (which is great) but I don't know how many are trying to write either songs or melodies. My dream is to one day string something together that will really be good but it's hard work. I can spend hours trying to squeeze out a decent riff on piano, listening to the notes as they run together and trying to get a string of notes that blend in. Hours can pass. Sometimes there is no result and other times I get something that can be used but then I wonder how good it is.

You're absolutely right--you don't need instrumental skill, perfect pitch, a sense of rhythm, or any of that stuff to make music. One of the most valuable expressions to remember is K.I.S.S. -- "keep it simple, stupid!" Good-sounding production on a recording can make all the difference. Witness Lana Del Rey on record vs. her live appearance on SNL.

Joe Meek was one of the most innovative music producers of the 1960s, and the guy was tone-deaf, and didn't really have much of a sense of who was talented and who wasn't; he would recruit singers/musicians because they were "blokes he fancied."

 

[Daniel]

One other interesting point is with music I think there sometimes needs to be shared imput. I could put together a riff on synth and add bass and drums and someone else could point out a subtle chord change or diversion could make the whole thing come together and that did happen with groups.
Anyway to the point: A lot of people here clearly doing in depth instrumental (which is great) but I don't know how many are trying to write either songs or melodies. My dream is to one day string something together that will really be good but it's hard work. I can spend hours trying to squeeze out a decent riff on piano, listening to the notes as they run together and trying to get a string of notes that blend in. Hours can pass. Sometimes there is no result and other times I get something that can be used but then I wonder how good it is.

I'm glad you mentioned "shared input" and "songs and melodies"!

Re: "shared input" -- I've always been terrible about that! I've realized that if I want to do anything with music out in the world, I need to collaborate. Especially since my Aspie interests tend to run towards stuff that has limited appeal. I would very much like to learn how to collaborate with others. When I did my last batch of songs, I consulted with a couple of musically-inclined friends, and their responses were incredibly valuable. The changes they suggested worked out quite well.

Re: "songs and melodies" -- I also noticed that most of the stuff others put on SoundCloud is instrumental. Neat stuff, but I'm curious to hear how other Aspies write songs. I posted my own SoundCloud link a few posts back, and a bunch of my songs are up there now. Only two of them are instrumentals, and those were just arrangements of old video game themes. Pretty much everything I write has words and typical Western song structure.

I hope you keep plugging away at songwriting! Even if you're never quite satisfied with the results, I swear the journey is rewarding in itself. "Hours can pass"--that's a great sign!

I kind of can't believe I'm going to suggest this, but if you would ever like some feedback about your work, I'd be happy to lend an ear, or to discuss how to get from inspiration to completion!

 

[wyverary]

Point taken. Years ago I started guitar lessons with a girl who taught classical guitar. It just didn't take off and I would get very nervous. All my attempts to get to grips with guitar have failed somehow. Yet most people always tell me I seem to be O.K. with keyboard and it comes more naturally to me.
I'm sure you'll figure out what's best for yourself and I agree you should do something else if an activity makes you feel unsatisfied.

Absolutely! Those intense, classical days are behind me, but I still love music, and always will. I'm glad I've found healthier outlets for it.