Is this a "me" thing, or an ASD thing?

[y2marmar]

I hate the sound of people chewing or eating. No real reason, I just can't bear it. It upsets me, makes me feel panicky, angry, etc. Like I said, there's no reason for this, I just hate eating noises. Is it me? Or...

 

[HelloDizzy]

I recently found out that my stomach issues are related to my Aspergers as well as my temper, sudden displays of emotional immaturity inappropriate for my age (often anger induced) as well as the fact that I do indeed tend to have meltdowns but have trained myself to control them most of the time, at least outwardly.

What I want to know is if the fact that I can't seem to make myself eat oranges when it isn't daylight is Aspergers or me being weird.

 

[Flinty]

What I want to know is if the fact that I can't seem to make myself eat oranges when it isn't daylight is Aspergers or me being weird.

It could go either way. I've not been able to stand even being around oranges for decades now - well, they're fine if no one's peeling them. Otherwise THE BURNING IT HURTS SO MUCH.

 

[danielcollins]

Maybe this is just me, I'm not too high on the spectrum (like 2,3 out of 10? or so I've been told) but background noise is SO LOUD

I work in an office and my concentration when slightly unfocussed is almost non-existant.. like I' hear someone dropping there pen, someone coughing, someone typing, someone discussing something with another colleague.. it's not that loud just amazingly distracting.

Imagine like an amazingly loud drill while you're trying to do your homework.. that's the only way I can explain it!

SO irritating when I'm interested in something or I can't focus on something because my colleague is on the phone (not there fault)..

 

[King_Oni]

Recently I thought about a few things that struck me as "might be ASD related". Especially cause a friend of mine who recently got his diagnosis as well, told me last year (way before any of us had an official Dx), he's having problems with such things.

A lot of stuff does go back to childhood and such;

• I couldn't read a analog clock till at least my late teens/early 20's. I just didn't comprehend the long and short arm on the thing. As a kid I therefore always had digital clocks.
• Until after my 10th year, I couldn't tie my shoelaces. I always had shoes with a velcro, and in a way it made me feel weird cause I thought people made fun of me still having such shoes. Than my parents got upset, and they told me I had to learn it. They'd show me the 2 ways it's done in general, and I had to practice for an afternoon. I still didn't get it. However;
  
  
  Spoiler

  I developed a own method, which made more sense to me, and I even learned that aspie friend of mine that, cause he told me he was still having problems with laces at 27 years of age. That method worked for him as well.
• I had big difficulties with subtraction in elementery. They used this method where you had to put the numbers below eachother, and just subtract single digits and carry over what's left and such, like this (cause I don't know if I'm explaining it clearly);
  
  
  Spoiler

  437
  358 -
  ----
  79
  
  But I usually just picked the "easiest" way and didn't comprehend how to carry over numbers. So back then I'd say it's 121.
  As a result of not understand a lot of division as well, as that came down to subtraction.
  The biggest problem was, that I had to use these methods, and was graded on the method, not neccesarily on the results. That went horrible back then. However, later on, when I was more free to do them however I liked, I did them ok.
• When I had drawing classes in elementary I was either occupied with coloring or drawing. I could draw something that needed coloring. So I got a lot of bad grades where the teacher wrote "use more color" on my reportcards. The idea of doing lines and not doing shades of grey with a pencil didn't really work out in my mind.
  
• And handwriting, that was a big mess as well. And somewhat still is. Now I blame typing more, but back then... I remember having this workbook and you had to write a single letter and reproduce it over and over. I could write pages without having 2 look the same. (and now, I still hate repetition, which is why in my handwriting I might use 3 different A's in a single word)

 

[y2marmar]

Maybe this is just me, I'm not too high on the spectrum (like 2,3 out of 10? or so I've been told) but background noise is SO LOUD

I work in an office and my concentration when slightly unfocussed is almost non-existant.. like I' hear someone dropping there pen, someone coughing, someone typing, someone discussing something with another colleague.. it's not that loud just amazingly distracting.

Imagine like an amazingly loud drill while you're trying to do your homework.. that's the only way I can explain it!

SO irritating when I'm interested in something or I can't focus on something because my colleague is on the phone (not there fault)..

Yes, I have this problem too. Background noise is a huge issue.

 

[y2marmar]

Recently I thought about a few things that struck me as "might be ASD related". Especially cause a friend of mine who recently got his diagnosis as well, told me last year (way before any of us had an official Dx), he's having problems with such things.

A lot of stuff does go back to childhood and such;

• I couldn't read a analog clock till at least my late teens/early 20's. I just didn't comprehend the long and short arm on the thing. As a kid I therefore always had digital clocks.
• Until after my 10th year, I couldn't tie my shoelaces. I always had shoes with a velcro, and in a way it made me feel weird cause I thought people made fun of me still having such shoes. Than my parents got upset, and they told me I had to learn it. They'd show me the 2 ways it's done in general, and I had to practice for an afternoon. I still didn't get it. However;
  
  
  Spoiler

  I developed a own method, which made more sense to me, and I even learned that aspie friend of mine that, cause he told me he was still having problems with laces at 27 years of age. That method worked for him as well.
• I had big difficulties with subtraction in elementery. They used this method where you had to put the numbers below eachother, and just subtract single digits and carry over what's left and such, like this (cause I don't know if I'm explaining it clearly);
  
  
  Spoiler

  437
  358 -
  ----
  79
  
  But I usually just picked the "easiest" way and didn't comprehend how to carry over numbers. So back then I'd say it's 121.
  As a result of not understand a lot of division as well, as that came down to subtraction.
  The biggest problem was, that I had to use these methods, and was graded on the method, not neccesarily on the results. That went horrible back then. However, later on, when I was more free to do them however I liked, I did them ok.
• When I had drawing classes in elementary I was either occupied with coloring or drawing. I could draw something that needed coloring. So I got a lot of bad grades where the teacher wrote "use more color" on my reportcards. The idea of doing lines and not doing shades of grey with a pencil didn't really work out in my mind.
  
• And handwriting, that was a big mess as well. And somewhat still is. Now I blame typing more, but back then... I remember having this workbook and you had to write a single letter and reproduce it over and over. I could write pages without having 2 look the same. (and now, I still hate repetition, which is why in my handwriting I might use 3 different A's in a single word)

I have problems with EVERY one of these too. I'm pretty much useless with subtraction or division, handwriting has always been a mess, i couldn't tie my shoes til I was nearly 12. I can empathize with everything you've written

 

[Flinty]

• Until after my 10th year, I couldn't tie my shoelaces. I always had shoes with a velcro, and in a way it made me feel weird cause I thought people made fun of me still having such shoes. Than my parents got upset, and they told me I had to learn it. They'd show me the 2 ways it's done in general, and I had to practice for an afternoon. I still didn't get it.
  
• When I had drawing classes in elementary I was either occupied with coloring or drawing. I could draw something that needed coloring. So I got a lot of bad grades where the teacher wrote "use more color" on my reportcards. The idea of doing lines and not doing shades of grey with a pencil didn't really work out in my mind.
  
• And handwriting, that was a big mess as well. And somewhat still is. Now I blame typing more, but back then... I remember having this workbook and you had to write a single letter and reproduce it over and over. I could write pages without having 2 look the same. (and now, I still hate repetition, which is why in my handwriting I might use 3 different A's in a single word)

It was about grade 9 before I could really tie my shoelaces, largely because I didn't have the hand co-ordination until I had some experience with video games (which were still new back then). It meant junior high in Velcro shoes.

Nothing about art class was fun for me. I couldn't trace an xkcd cartoon and make it look half-decent.

Oh, and the handwriting. Those of you that are under 40 might not believe this, but there was a time last century when being left-handed was borderline unacceptable...and my grade 3-4 teacher was about the last of that breed. There were three of us in that class who got regular detention because our writing "leaned the wrong way". By a strange coincidence, we were all southpaws. My handwriting ceased to be a problem when I hit junior high and we were allowed more freedom to write in the way we were most comfortable; for me, it was less cursive and more jointed manuscript. (I also grew a habit of mimicking the teacher's handwriting in a given class.) Also, the video games probably helped again. Now, people say my writing is "good for a left-hander". :S

 

[Kelly]

Can you give an example of the sort of things that you hear?

When I worked at a pizza store there was a beep that would go off whenever the front door was opened. After a couple of months I began hearing the beeping when there wasn't anyone at the front. I would be in the back talking to a co-worker and stop mid conversation and walk to the front of the store all prepared to take someone's order but find an empty lobby. My entire time working there no other employees had the same problem.

I get this sort of thing alot, when I was younger I could hear my mum shouting me, beeping/ringing noises all the time but particularly if I had music on, it's hard to describe, even now when I listen to certain songs I can hear other things, now it's my daughter shouting "mummy". I often stop talking mid conversation because I hear something, most of the time it is an actual noise and only ocassionally something I expect to hear. Another example when I used to keep tropical fish and had several tanks every night in bed I was sure I could hear water pouring on the floor, as a result I would get up about 5/6 times a night to check the tanks were not leaking.

No one laughs at my jokes anyways so I may as well have no audience.

Definately this! I can quite easily make fun of something, a witty remark etc but most of the time actual jokes are met with a blank stare and the same goes for 80% of the time I don't get other people's jokes. Example my husband and I were watching the tv series OZ and at the end of that episode I said I expected the guy to kill him not just beat him up, I thought he'd kill him and he'd get the chair, here is the conversation from that point on

Husband: Yeah but then what would Hill do?
Me: What?....
Husband: Hill?! What would he do if Cyril got the chair?
Me: What are you on about? Hill has nothing to do with that story
Husband: Seriously? Hill...the bloke in the wheelchair...
Me: Yeah?!...
Husband: FFS! Hill is in a wheelchair, if Cyril gets the chair what is Hill going to do...now do you understand?!
Me: Ooooh...right, I see now, bad joke
Husband: No it wasn't you just didn't get it

That is how it goes for me most of the time, if it's a silly remark like if someone says something that can be interpreted as dirty he might say "that's what he says to all the girls", now that kind of thing I get but jokes like that above, totally over my head.

Is this typical: to transition from being an honor roll student in elementary school, to having difficulty in the later grades?

When I first started seconday (high) school I was so good at maths I was ahead of the entire class, same with french, they had 4 sets at my school, set 4 was the lowest, set 1 the highest I was in the excel class which was for those that were far better then set 1 standards. Then I got to about 13 and just couldn't do it anymore it was like my brain just gave up, something I did notice was that when we had tests if I revised for them I did very badly if I didn't revise at all I aced the exams. I think my brain just became overloaded and refused to work or something lol.

My handwriting is terrible, my husband says it looks like a child's because it's not joined up, but I don't see the logic in writing that way because alot of the time people can't read your writing if it's joined up, my daughter is the same, she finds it totally illogical to join letters up when it makes it harder to read, as a result she's not very good at it. I was late learning to tie my laces as well, I remember my aunt trying to teach me when I was about 7 and I just could not understand it, I don't know how old I was when I learnt but I remember being teased for being so late. Same with riding a bike, I had stabilisers until I was about 8 because I just couldn't get the idea of shifting your balance to keep the bike steady.

Does anyone stare into space after thinking about something alot? I might be thinking about something and then I'll stop but I completely zone out and keep staring into space and then I become concious of staring and not actually thinking of anything if that makes sense?

Another thing I do is when I'm outside walking, I've always walked with my hands glues to my sides and I try my best to swing them like other people but it just feels so wrong and fake. I'm slightly better with my left arm but my right I just can't get to swing like other people do. I can vividly remember as a child my mum telling me to walk properly and move my arms too , so I swung my arms in such a dramatic way she quickly backtracked and told me to stop walking THAT way.

I also like to walk on the sides of my feet, usually at home barefoot and particularly if I'm sleepy, I do it outside sometimes and had to throw some chunky boots away because the heels and part of the sole had worn away at such an angle it was becoming increasingly difficult to walk in them.

 

[danielcollins]

Anyone else mix up related/semi-related words often? I do all the time. Words I most commonly mix up, that I can think of at the top of my head, are "curtains" and "blinds". That's always bugged me a lot. Whenever I say that, someone corrects me and probably thinks I'm too stupid to know the difference between blinds and curtains.

I know for sure that this isn't just an ASD thing. But it's perhaps more common of a problem in people on the spectrum than in those who aren't.

I do this a lot now I come to think about it, It's when I'm trying to think too fast time times.. I.E. keeping up with conversation and the words sorta tumble out.

 

[danielcollins]

Anyone else mix up related/semi-related words often? I do all the time. Words I most commonly mix up, that I can think of at the top of my head, are "curtains" and "blinds". That's always bugged me a lot. Whenever I say that, someone corrects me and probably thinks I'm too stupid to know the difference between blinds and curtains.

I know for sure that this isn't just an ASD thing. But it's perhaps more common of a problem in people on the spectrum than in those who aren't.

I do this A LOT, Much more noticeable now that you mention it.. It's like when you're trying to keep up in conversation and related words get all confused and tumble out.

 

[danielcollins]

And handwriting, that was a big mess as well. And somewhat still is. Now I blame typing more, but back then... I remember having this workbook and you had to write a single letter and reproduce it over and over. I could write pages without having 2 look the same. (and now, I still hate repetition, which is why in my handwriting I might use 3 different A's in a single word)
[/LIST]

This, My hand writing isn't very good. I find it painful to write for too long as I put far too much pressure on a pen or pencil.

Really struggle with grammar, sentences and paragraphs it sounds silly but I can't visualize when to put a full stop.. I write how my brain talks and speaks.

 

[cheetoe80]

This, My hand writing isn't very good. I find it painful to write for too long as I put far too much pressure on a pen or pencil.

Really struggle with grammar, sentences and paragraphs it sounds silly but I can't visualize when to put a full stop.. I write how my brain talks and speaks.

I had the same issues in school as a child, guess I still do. went to physical therapy to learn to write better in I think, second grade.

 

[Kelly]

This, My hand writing isn't very good. I find it painful to write for too long as I put far too much pressure on a pen or pencil.

Really struggle with grammar, sentences and paragraphs it sounds silly but I can't visualize when to put a full stop.. I write how my brain talks and speaks.

I grip pens/pencils far too hard so if I'm writing for any length of time my fingers hurt. I do the same with video game controllers, I have to keep reminding myself not to grip it so hard otherwise after playing for a couple of hours my hands really hurt.

I also have problems with grammar and have to go over and over what I've written before posting to make sure all the mistakes are fixed...well most of them I still miss a few here and there.

 

[Droopy]

I also have issues writing with a pen/pencil. My fingers and hand hurts after a while and my handwriting quality is poor. I have no problems with grammar/paragraphs/spelling though.

 

[kasmanaft08]

I also have issues writing with a pen/pencil. My fingers and hand hurts after a while and my handwriting quality is poor. I have no problems with grammar/paragraphs/spelling though.

Im the same.
I would have massive problems if the pen or pencil wasnt the right texture, for a pencil, or smoothness with a pen. Ive also been told I hold my pens a bit weird and could never hold it properly when i learned how to write. Also told i have very unfeminine handwriting, whatever that means, but its never considered bad, though. Most people actually find it weirdly neat.

 

[blur]

I m like this too. You are just been logical and probably has switch off the emotional part of you.
What is wrong? I also experience not so normal feelings like others. I find those funeral stuff very fakey.
Why are they splurging and mourning like these?
If they really love and cherish the person, they would have done it while the person is alive. And if they have done it, why are they grieving etc.... ?
And has the person that we love really die?
To me, it is no. They live in my heart, mind and life constantly.
Like a Cd rom, sometimes i replay the memories in my mind.
And i really hate it when family ask me to pray for or to my late grandfather.
He is alway on my mind, a wonderful man whom i love daily.
So what is the logic and rationale of praying?

I apologize for asking this but...

Is it just me, but is it the "typical" for one with Asperger's to be "strong", "brave", and "stable" during the death of a love one?

I am not trying to troll or pick at people. I just believe I am not grieving right.

I really loved this relative that died and was close, but I am the "brave" one during this time.

 

[blur]

I also have problems holding a pen/ pencil. My handwriting is so weird. It varies according to my mood. Can difer totally.
I enjoy writing but the problem lies with my handwriting and the way i hold a pen/pencil. I find it kind of impossible to correct.
I tried to correct the problems when i was young. But i just cant make it til now.

Maybe one day, i will manage.

Im the same.
I would have massive problems if the pen or pencil wasnt the right texture, for a pencil, or smoothness with a pen. Ive also been told I hold my pens a bit weird and could never hold it properly when i learned how to write. Also told i have very unfeminine handwriting, whatever that means, but its never considered bad, though. Most people actually find it weirdly neat.

 

[Gomendosi]

This is probably gonna be me alone I am certain but;
I can usually find the pros and cons in every situation, if I am faced with the worst case scenario I can easily find something redemptive about it.
Conversely if there is a perfect scenario, a too good to be true type situation, I am the first to pick holes and spot the rotten core, now, is this me? Pessimism/ optimism or ASD related?

 

[King_Oni]

This is probably gonna be me alone I am certain but;
I can usually find the pros and cons in every situation, if I am faced with the worst case scenario I can easily find something redemptive about it.
Conversely if there is a perfect scenario, a too good to be true type situation, I am the first to pick holes and spot the rotten core, now, is this me? Pessimism/ optimism or ASD related?

I do that quite often.

I usually expect the worst, so it can only get better from there.

And if it's going really well, I'm inclined to at least mentally prepare for the worst already.

A thing I've heard/read on another ASD forum is that those on the spectrum are more pessimistic. Weirdly enough no one had sources, however, the perception "we" might have of reality might be closer ot reality than what optimist think. Remember; A pessimist is a well-informed optimist.