Well, this may make me a tiny bit unpopular but actually as an aspie I do think there is something wrong with me
In my experience I'm sometimes tasked to be the one saying the unpleasant truths... however, I'm with you, in part...
A lot of Aspies have problems. Because we're different. Most of these problems exists in the interaction with other people.
I had a thought, if only everyone on this planet could be Aspies, but I've since then realized that Aspies do have communication problems, even with each other's, and having an understanding NT around could be very important to an Aspie.
In my experience it's a question of prioritizing. I have ADHD as well as Asperger, and I've learned not to mention every association or thought that comes up when I speak to people... in fact, if I did, I'd be taking over the conversation 100%... which would not work at all.
This is an example of how you might have to suppress some of your "sides" in order to increase the potential for communication and coexistence with others. But it doesn't mean that side is wrong... only wrong for that given situation...
Another problem an Aspie might have in a conversation is they don't know what to talk about, or talk only about what interests them. Whenever that happens to me, I try to take a step back and figure out something interesting about the person I'm talking to or what they're talking about. Since my natural disposition is to talk about what interests me and nothing else, giving a few moments focus on the other person and what interests them wont be a problem. Just tie the conversation to a personally important situation.
If someone goes on about their orchids, tell them you'd love to get some flowers because you've heard it's good for the indoor air, or when they talk about their dog, tell them your family had one when you were a kid but you're allergic, however it would be fun to have some kind of pet (not a snake though!) and so on ...
You can learn to ACT more normal without having to change your personality (I bet only drugs can do that... and ... don't do drugs!)
On the other hand, observe NT's, they do a lot of things that aren't right for the situation as well... nobody's perfect!
This does, however, not mean that you should be the only one changing... in fact, if you're around people that refuse to adjust their style of interaction because you're not "doing it right" I'd say they have a problem just as big as yours... perhaps they're Aspies too? (I mean, with all that rigidity...) Most people, however, are pretty open to some strain to understand other people. People love to communicate!
I'm highly skeptical I could ever appear to be N.T. unless I become a brilliant actor.
In fact, I heard somewhere that a number of actors could in fact be Aspies.
In order to understand other people they've had to be social detectives and use "science" to figure out the whole social situation... attending acting school might have been a tool for these people to figure other people out and given that they had no "normal" to fall back on, understanding people in this "scientific" way became necessary to these people.
Once they did understand, they did it in a way that was non intuitive, so applying this knowledge to play other people became very easy... they became so good at it that they're great actors today.
I've spent some time acting in my youth and I think this has helped me a lot.
On the other hand, why is it so bad to appear something that's not completely you?
People do play roles and change their ways of being... trust me, when a person is alone they act different than from when they're with their kids, or with their boss or with their mom (I have a friend who switches to a broad dialect when he speaks to his parents on the phone!)
People also act differently depending on the situation... compare your colleagues at work and at the after work pub. You'll notice differences, sometimes big, sometimes small.
When I studied psychology there was one theory that we don't have a personality, but that what's "us" is actually a mesh of all our relations to other people.
I am not sure that's right but I do know that people change a lot depending on who they are around... I guess you could call it "acting" but I think it's done as a courtesy and a way to ease coexistence...