What do you find is most difficult in your life?

[edwardstpowell]

I was wondering what aspects of life do people in this forum feel the most difficult?

I for example find that I have difficulties in social skills and not interrupting conversations. I also find when I am using facts and knowledge sometimes I can get it all muddled up.

What does everyone else think?

 

[wanderer03]

I was wondering what aspects of life do people in this forum feel the most difficult?

I for example find that I have difficulties in social skills and not interrupting conversations.

My big difficulties are really in executive functioning. It used to be both social skills and executive functioning. I overcame the worst of the social skills by learning to actively observe other's behavior before I begin to engage. I still loathe social situations.

 

[Bro'Freak]

I find cyclical conversations where one finds that they are hearing the same old story time & time again up there for being hard to deal with. But not quite as bad as an over eager friend who seems to need confirmation in either a yes, a smile or
any instant response for their current exclamation. To put it another way a close friend whenever they say anything to someone else they always look at me for agreement, even when I am not in the conversation & the other side of the room. I find this one of my pet peives. I just zone out a bit, pretend I did not notice or go "u hu" with a nod. I am carefull that I might be classed as rude due to this behaviour so I don't dwell on what happened & remember that they are my friend.

 

[Cali Cat]

Executive functioning is my biggest problem. The social stuff doesn't bother me too much anymore, as I'm older and have figured out how to deal with people. I still get drained being around people for too long though.

Also, the amount of time I need to recover from heavy interaction keeps me pretty reclusive. I need a greater than average amount of alone time, which makes relationships difficult.

 

[wanderer03]

Executive functioning is my biggest problem. The social stuff doesn't bother me too much anymore, as I'm older and have figured out how to deal with people. I still get drained being around people for too long though.

Also, the amount of time I need to recover from heavy interaction keeps me pretty reclusive. I need a greater than average amount of alone time, which makes relationships difficult.

I'm finding tools like Any.do to help with this. I actually need alarms to remind me to take my medicine and brush my teeth. If I don't have these reminders, I don't do these tasks. Any.do has been a godsend.

 

[clg114]

Conversations in a social setting when there are a lot of people around. I never know what to say, so I usually do not say anything. Unless my wife tells me to speak up. I always do what she tells me to do. However, if it is a conversation with one or two people and the subject is something that I know a lot about, I get kind of carried away. A real good example is when I am done with a job, the customer while often ask me "What was wrong with it?" or "What did you do to fix it." So I will explain it to them until I notice that they are uncomfortable and have no idea what I am talking about. I know that I should not have talked so long, but if they did not want to know, why did they ask ? So for me, I do not talk enough or talk way to much.

 

[wanderer03]

Conversations in a social setting when there are a lot of people around. I never know what to say, so I usually do not say anything. Unless my wife tells me to speak up. I always do what she tells me to do. However, if it is a conversation with one or two people and the subject is something that I know a lot about, I get kind of carried away. A real good example is when I am done with a job, the customer while often ask me "What was wrong with it?" or "What did you do to fix it." So I will explain it to them until I notice that they are uncomfortable and have no idea what I am talking about. I know that I should not have talked so long, but if they did not want to know, why did they ask ?

I'll never understand the NT mentality of asking a question that they don't really want to know the answer to. It is very illogical. I guess they expect a simple, dumbed down explanation?

 

[Mathalamus]

the most difficult things i do in this life is social expansion. to me, its a long and complicated process with loads of preperation, then i have to actually do it, and then somehow integrate the expansion into my life.

the nature of my personality is that breaking the status quo is incredibly painful and difficult to move past.

in short, it is a long convoluted process that many of you will not understand if i told you how its actually done.

 

[Southern Discomfort]

Just feeling like I can't function like a normal member of sociality. Leaving the house on my own is tremendous work. Trying to get work is also hard.

 

[Astroganga]

Being a really tidy and organised person in my head but then executive functioning issues make putting it into practice, really really hard. The other thing I find so hard is not knowing what is appropriate or too much in social situations. I also get really paranoid and assume the worst, if I don't hear back from someone on social media or real life. I then try and 'fix' the perceived faux pas that I think I have made, and make things worse.

 

[Mia]

Think it's probably sensory difficulties, loud noise primarily. If I could spent my life with something blocking loud sounds I would be fine. Yet putting on music and wearing headphones makes me slightly insane under certain conditions, if I can't hear whats going on around me then I'm anxious and stressed, it's the volume of the noise that makes me fatigued.

 

[garnetflower13]

Conversations in a social setting when there are a lot of people around. I never know what to say, so I usually do not say anything. Unless my wife tells me to speak up. I always do what she tells me to do. However, if it is a conversation with one or two people and the subject is something that I know a lot about, I get kind of carried away. A real good example is when I am done with a job, the customer while often ask me "What was wrong with it?" or "What did you do to fix it." So I will explain it to them until I notice that they are uncomfortable and have no idea what I am talking about. I know that I should not have talked so long, but if they did not want to know, why did they ask ? So for me, I do not talk enough or talk way to much.

This. I tend to talk too long (for Nts) or go into too much detail when talking to others. The more nervous I get, the more I talk! the fact that I don't know how to dumb down or summarize is my biggest problem.

 

[NothingToSeeHere]

Executive functioning issues, and social anxiety. My social skills aren't bad if I can actually get past the anxiety in order to interact with people.

 

[wanderer03]

Executive functioning issues, and social anxiety. My social skills aren't bad if I can actually get past the anxiety in order to interact with people.

Since discovering the Any.do app, I'm getting better. Check it out ... it's simple and free. I have reminders set to brush my teeth, take my medicine, take the trash out, etc. This tool has improved my executive functioning by an order of magnitude. What Any.do has done for my executive functioning is nothing short of a miracle.

Part of me feels sad about being dependent on a tool to help but it's similar to a diabetic needing insulin.

 

[shinkansen]

Empathy.

Trying to figure how other people might be feeling. Or trying to ask the right questions in a difficult situation. I know I've hurt people this way. My diagnosis highlighted a particularly low empathy quotient. And I've failed that Sally-Anne test where you're meant to guess what someone might be thinking.