My youngest sister was taken into care at 7 and due to lies, she held me responsible for herself being in care and thus, I was not allowed any more contact with her.
Speed up to around 11 or so year's ago now, I reached out to a social worker and took it upon herself to search out my youngest sister. Much to my surprise ( more surreal), I was told that she had been found and urged to write a letter to her. That was the hardest letter to achieve, but after many scribblings, I made do with it and sent it off. My heart was in my throat ( so to speak). I finally got a phone call from the social worker, who said she had spoken to Tracy and that she thanked me for my letter, but did not want anything to do with me or her birth family ( I understood the birth family; but was hurt that she felt that way about me). I could go no further, because I am not a person with clout and live in a different country etc. So, with heart filled with bitterness and wanting my teddy bear back, that I had given her as a child, I tried to erase it from my memory and move on.
Another sister who is roughly 2 and a bit year's younger than me ( who also had done me a gross injustice), suddenly contacted me and said she heard I tried to get in touch with Tracy and that could I give her the details and she would try? Now, I did get angry at this and even said: if you want to, go ahead. Deep inside, I suspected she would get further than me, because she does have clout. She talks - people listen. I talk - people don't.
A couple of day's ago, said sister contacted me ( after 6 years) and and said that she cares about me and came to realise it was thanks to me, our siblings stopped being sexually abused further. She also realised that instead of her being the strong one, it is actually me who is the strong one. Because, despite all my issues, I stood up against the abuse and severe neglect. She ran away.
She then proceeds to tell me that she is trying to gain contact with Tracy and that she has found I was lied to. That my youngest sister never said she did not want anything to do with me! Wow, she is now 40 and a mother of two children and has been with her partner for over 20 years! I just find it hard to get my head around.
Even more mindblowing, is that my two sisters have met and Tracy wants to get in touch with me. In truth, I am scared witless about this. I do not feel emotionally stable to cope with all these revelations!
Speed up to around 11 or so year's ago now, I reached out to a social worker and took it upon herself to search out my youngest sister. Much to my surprise ( more surreal), I was told that she had been found and urged to write a letter to her. That was the hardest letter to achieve, but after many scribblings, I made do with it and sent it off. My heart was in my throat ( so to speak). I finally got a phone call from the social worker, who said she had spoken to Tracy and that she thanked me for my letter, but did not want anything to do with me or her birth family ( I understood the birth family; but was hurt that she felt that way about me). I could go no further, because I am not a person with clout and live in a different country etc. So, with heart filled with bitterness and wanting my teddy bear back, that I had given her as a child, I tried to erase it from my memory and move on.
Another sister who is roughly 2 and a bit year's younger than me ( who also had done me a gross injustice), suddenly contacted me and said she heard I tried to get in touch with Tracy and that could I give her the details and she would try? Now, I did get angry at this and even said: if you want to, go ahead. Deep inside, I suspected she would get further than me, because she does have clout. She talks - people listen. I talk - people don't.
A couple of day's ago, said sister contacted me ( after 6 years) and and said that she cares about me and came to realise it was thanks to me, our siblings stopped being sexually abused further. She also realised that instead of her being the strong one, it is actually me who is the strong one. Because, despite all my issues, I stood up against the abuse and severe neglect. She ran away.
She then proceeds to tell me that she is trying to gain contact with Tracy and that she has found I was lied to. That my youngest sister never said she did not want anything to do with me! Wow, she is now 40 and a mother of two children and has been with her partner for over 20 years! I just find it hard to get my head around.
Even more mindblowing, is that my two sisters have met and Tracy wants to get in touch with me. In truth, I am scared witless about this. I do not feel emotionally stable to cope with all these revelations!
