Rudeness

[Ylva]

I came across this article in the New York Times:

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/02/15/magazine/the-age-of-rudeness.html?_r=1

Tldr: Rudeness is a show of power and is used to hurt those who are hurt by words.

My takeaway: It is not that we are rude, but we are perceived as speaking truth to power, which in turn is perceived as a threat to… something.

 

[Mia]

This is exquisitely written, dense, thoughtful, perceptive, metaphorical. It's beauty is in it's perceptions. It's so unusual to encounter such excellent writing, that I actually had to take a few extra breaths to go on. I need to think about what she's written for a time, and then I'll reply with my own thoughts on this. Thank-you for posting such a thoughtful piece.

 

[FreeDiver]

"truth to power?" It's interesting that you brought that up. My mom would try to teach me how to tell "white lies" to avoid hurting someone's feelings. I was jest never good at it and it had landed me in quite a bit of trouble.

 

[NeoPhile]

The stereotype of aspies is that we are rude. We have to do everything we can to turn aside this stereotype.

 

[Mia]

When I read the writer's opinion, and her experiences I perceive her as entitled. She seems to believe somehow, that she deserves to be treated better than others. She focuses on the security guard's uniform and it's ugliness, and the 'common' looking custom's agent's physical characteristics. As if somehow they are lesser human beings because of this, which seems a petty judgement on her part.

They act 'rudely' because they appear to have poor manners. And the way they treat people coming through security and customs, is rude rather than polite treatment. Something she is obviously used to, and entitled to, just for being who she is.

The security guard and the customs agent might be fatigued, unwell, or a myriad of things, and bullies are everywhere. Some in positions of authority, who use that position to control others, from every strata of society. It seems that the writer does not like being affected by others, especially people she considers lesser than herself. They have no right to do so, as she is entitled to good treatment.

 

[Ylva]

The stereotype of aspies is that we are rude. We have to do everything we can to turn aside this stereotype.

We really don't. That would imply that people can control us with stereotyping.

 

[NeoPhile]

We really don't. That would imply that people can control us with stereotyping.

I don't follow. I just said we have to try to turn aside stereotypes.

 

[Ylva]

We don't have to do "everything we can". That is way too much effort. Unless you mean "to the best of our ability treat like it doesn't exist (as long as it's safe)". In that case I applaud your suggestion.

 

[Aspergers_Aspie]

I come across rudeness all the time. I think and don't understand why, everyone doesn't try to be good and make the most of life. I am happy though I try to be good and polite and friendly and helpful. Rudeness puts me in a mood where I drink too much, where I am not the real me where I am not talkative where I could miss out on friendships maybe even relationships, I'm preoccupied and people find me distant too, another aspie I know has meltdowns at people being rude. One instance of someone or people being rude builds and is like a rubber band being pulled and when it snaps I drink too much and it stops me from doing positive things