nagibator
Member
Well after being diagnosed in January only I'm in the process of reviewing myself and my behaviour.
One thing I have noticed is the lack of subtlety. I may notice it from others but usually put it off as a sign of weakness. Then I overshoot coming of too strong, resulting in the other person thinking wtf. And then I don't know what to do. Because apologising for being myself is out of the question. I had a reason and that reason is still valid.
Well at least now I see the difference. First step to adjusting. I just find it hard as the "old" response is pretty close to a reflex as it gets.
It's usually something like. This particular thing I don't like so the whole situation or person is tainted. I don't want any of that.
Reminds me of what my diagnostician said. Black and white is how I see the world. Which isn't true in theory. Yet in practice it is. I just never saw it that way. Because I myself am making self referential sense.
Not sure what to say. But I'm pissed at this and wish it was different. I'm kind of disconnecting myself from other people this way and then mourn the fact of me being disconnected, because they don't connect to me unless I'm making an effort myself. Well that mostly goes for females. I just wish it was all clear and logical. :...(
One thing I have noticed is the lack of subtlety. I may notice it from others but usually put it off as a sign of weakness. Then I overshoot coming of too strong, resulting in the other person thinking wtf. And then I don't know what to do. Because apologising for being myself is out of the question. I had a reason and that reason is still valid.
Well at least now I see the difference. First step to adjusting. I just find it hard as the "old" response is pretty close to a reflex as it gets.
It's usually something like. This particular thing I don't like so the whole situation or person is tainted. I don't want any of that.
Reminds me of what my diagnostician said. Black and white is how I see the world. Which isn't true in theory. Yet in practice it is. I just never saw it that way. Because I myself am making self referential sense.
Not sure what to say. But I'm pissed at this and wish it was different. I'm kind of disconnecting myself from other people this way and then mourn the fact of me being disconnected, because they don't connect to me unless I'm making an effort myself. Well that mostly goes for females. I just wish it was all clear and logical. :...(