Not sure about anything much but I'm here

[Boggle]

Hi, I'm 30yrs/F. I came across the forum and joined because I am searching for answers... I've been thinking for some time maybe I am on the Autism spectrum but I've spent years working with people with severe ASD and intellectual disability so I'm having a hard time grasping the concept of high functioning Autism. Some of me is very convinced I have it (have previously been diagnosed years back with other things including anxiety and depression), but some of me is telling myself to stop being ridiculous and that I function just fine. Strangely enough just a week ago our son's daycare brought up they think he may have high functioning ASD, so that plus a close relative recently receiving a diagnosis has thrown me into a spin. I'm here in the hope of finding out what high functioning ASD is like for people and whether or not I'm a twit for thinking it. I feel like a lot of my "things" could be explained by Autism, but ultimately I wonder if there is any point in me finding out.

 

[Mia]

Greetings Boggle, welcome to the forum.

 

[Wolfsage]

Hello.

 

[Thinx]

Hi and welcome. Well a clue could be, if it's relatively unchanging and doesn't respond to your attempts to change or develop in those areas, it could be autism traits. High functioning means what it says, so many of us are indistinguishable from neurotypical people as far as functionality. But with varied challenges caused by our differently functioning brain. Severe ASD as you describe it, is maybe a misleading term, as it is the comorbid issues such as intellectual disabilities that make the person's condition severe.

Have a look at Sandra Hendrickx's book, Women and Girls with Autism spectrum disorder (Jessica Kingsley publishers 2015) she worked with people with autism for years before realising it applied to her, as it presents differently in women and girls.

I hope you enjoy it here and find it useful and supportive.

 

[MyLifeAsAnAspie]

Welcome to the forums . You raise a lot of good questions. Why get diagnosed, if I'm not looking for any help? Many people seem to get validation from the diagnosis, having always wondering if they were on the wrong planet but never understood why they felt like this. I feel the online screening quizzes are a good place to start. I understand adult diagnosis is often hard to obtain, doubly so for women. I am satisfy with my self diagnosis. The reasons for this include: Others in family with diagnosis or obvious without diagnosis; Childhood with all the signs; And an AQ of 34.

You're not the first one I heard of who has worked with autistics without suspecting they were ASD. In my case, upon learning about autistics when in high school, I think I had uneasy feeling of connectedness. This was the early 1970s so I'm talking about institutionalized autistics . In the late 1970s, I read about Asperger's and have never doubted that described me, long before anyone was talking about the spectrum.

 

[clg114]

Welcome to Autism Forums!

 

[Tom]

I slowly figured it out for myself in late 30's. That knowledge helped me to understand a lot more about myself and was very useful in improving my dealings with those close to me. Diagnosis was not an option as I was in the military. And I saw no benefit to getting a diagnosis afterwards. The knowledge though was pretty much a game changer in a positive way for me at least.

 

[Finder]

I am a 56 year-old male. I was diagnosed this year. I think for people that function fairly well, you can feel a bit of a fraud. But when things fall apart, then that is something different. I found a doctor saying I was on the spectrum a great relief. It explained so much and gave me a way to relate to the world. While I did identify I was on the spectrum, I still had doubt--some days I just feel fine.

As far as what it is like to function highly, that will probably differ among us. I see the world in different ways than my neurotypical colleagues. That can create conflict. Also, my need to be direct can be interpreted as arrogance and inflexibility when it is not. This does not happen with everyone, but mostly those that lack confidence and have few skills. There are a lot of hidden social agendas that I simply don't pick up on. I can suddenly feel blindsided by these. Because social communication is difficult, I speak to everyone the same way--I don't know how to change my communication with those in different positions. I am not rude (although some feel that way), but rather treat everyone as an equal. I get really confused as I can go it two different meetings, make the same decisions, yet those meeting can produce very different reactions in people.

But the flip side it I can visualize systems and problems so much better than my colleagues. I am able to go though large amounts of information and make connections. I have a better creative and problem solving capacity. The irony is that autistics are thought to be inflexible, but it is my colleagues that default to the "ways things are done."

Basically, you feel like you are always on the outside looking in.

 

[VictorR]

Welcome! Great advice by our fellow members thus far such that I don't have much to add

Thank you @Thinx for that suggestion - I'll add that to my list to books to read

 

[Boggle]

Welcome to the forums . You raise a lot of good questions. Why get diagnosed, if I'm not looking for any help? Many people seem to get validation from the diagnosis, having always wondering if they were on the wrong planet but never understood why they felt like this. I feel the online screening quizzes are a good place to start. I understand adult diagnosis is often hard to obtain, doubly so for women. I am satisfy with my self diagnosis. The reasons for this include: Others in family with diagnosis or obvious without diagnosis; Childhood with all the signs; And an AQ of 34.

You're not the first one I heard of who has worked with autistics without suspecting they were ASD. In my case, upon learning about autistics when in high school, I think I had uneasy feeling of connectedness. This was the early 1970s so I'm talking about institutionalized autistics . In the late 1970s, I read about Asperger's and have never doubted that described me, long before anyone was talking about the spectrum.

Thank you for the reply - I scored 37 on the online test and have a close relative also recently diagnosed. My son is also going to be assessed. I guess I'd just been told for ages since I started having panic attacks in my late teens that I was anxious so figured that was it! But ASD certainly makes sense to me.

 

[Boggle]

I am a 56 year-old male. I was diagnosed this year. I think for people that function fairly well, you can feel a bit of a fraud. But when things fall apart, then that is something different. I found a doctor saying I was on the spectrum a great relief. It explained so much and gave me a way to relate to the world. While I did identify I was on the spectrum, I still had doubt--some days I just feel fine.

As far as what it is like to function highly, that will probably differ among us. I see the world in different ways than my neurotypical colleagues. That can create conflict. Also, my need to be direct can be interpreted as arrogance and inflexibility when it is not. This does not happen with everyone, but mostly those that lack confidence and have few skills. There are a lot of hidden social agendas that I simply don't pick up on. I can suddenly feel blindsided by these. Because social communication is difficult, I speak to everyone the same way--I don't know how to change my communication with those in different positions. I am not rude (although some feel that way), but rather treat everyone as an equal. I get really confused as I can go it two different meetings, make the same decisions, yet those meeting can produce very different reactions in people.

But the flip side it I can visualize systems and problems so much better than my colleagues. I am able to go though large amounts of information and make connections. I have a better creative and problem solving capacity. The irony is that autistics are thought to be inflexible, but it is my colleagues that default to the "ways things are done."

Basically, you feel like you are always on the outside looking in.

Definitely feeling like a fraud for even thinking I might had ASD!

 

[AutisticAstronaut]

Welcome to the forum!