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Featured My week... Pushing myself too hard?

Discussion in 'General Autism Discussion' started by Sherlock77, Jul 15, 2017 at 11:07 PM.

  1. Sherlock77

    Sherlock77 Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    So... Here in Calgary it's Calgary Stampede week, almost over now, one day left.

    Back in June they were selling a pass that gave general admission for all 10 days at a steep discount, so I purchased it. As a photographer thought it would probably lead to a bunch of great photos and developing portfolio.

    First weekend, last weekend, it was extremely hot! Heat snap, so I stayed clear of the grounds because of that.

    Monday this week... The first day I used the pass, got in a little photography, then it poured! Fortunately I headed inside, came out eventually and did half an hour of rain photos.

    Also, did a full week of 10 hour shifts at the shop where I work, I would get home, try to rest up for an hour or two before walking down because I live so close, get home by about 11 PM, get to bed by about Midnight, get up at my usual 5:30 AM

    Tuesday... I went, mostly stayed in the art area, briefly took some photos outside

    Wednesday... Felt too tired after work, didn't go

    Thursday... Went down again, met up with a new internet friend and fellow photographer, had a good enough time but few photo results

    Friday... Went to classic car cruise night and a night market, only worked 8 hours being the end of the work week

    Today (Saturday)... Went downtown to do some Stampede photography, due to various circumstances got down a little late and didn't street level until almost 12:30 in the afternoon, due to various things didn't get very many photos... Was planning to do a midway run for photography tonight at the grounds, at 8 PM I was just tired, exhausted, lack of energy... So have stayed home tonight instead, I almost feel like I've failed myself, particularly tonight.

    Tomorrow... The last day, I tentatively plan to go during the daytime, also one of the first cooler days we've had lately, but being Sunday before a work week I doubt I'll get in another midway run in the evening.

    I'm sure I've exhausted many of you by simply reading this, maybe even exhausted myself by writing this, I just tend to push myself hard in my photography, maybe I tried too hard this year, it is my main obsession. I'm still questioning myself whether or not to even go tomorrow afternoon for that last day, in some ways I feel burned out. Yet I'll feel like I failed myself if I don't.

    And, no, it's not my job, no one pays me for it, I do it because I apparently enjoy it, and I do. :confused:
     
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  2. Katleya

    Katleya Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Maybe you should take it easy on the last day. Get up, do something that usually relaxes you, maybe have a nice breakfast if you're into that, and then decide if you feel up to it. There's nothing wrong with getting some rest and taking things a little slower.

    If you do end up going, then don't push yourself to stay too long. And if you don't go, you won't have failed yourself, because you did go most of the week.

    I'm confused why anyone would call an event "Stampede". Just the name makes me nervous...
     
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  3. Sherlock77

    Sherlock77 Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    To further clarify, Calgary Stampede is part rodeo (let's not get into the politics!), part midway (games and rides), an agricultural fair, music concerts, and even a large western art area, plus more... It's a very large event covering lots of space, and it's been called the Calgary Stampede since 1912, when it was much smaller.

    And thanks...
     
  4. OlLiE

    OlLiE Active Member

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    pushed too hard or are passionate about? pushing oneself can actually be enjoyable if you get a sense of satisfaction or self worth from the result of it, sometimes being busy (like your heavy shifts) can wear you out to the point that you feel too tired to do anything, i find that often once i've passed the initial obstacle to starting, that the activity i like is not as much of a burden as i thought, and i end up enjoying it
     
  5. Katleya

    Katleya Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Oh, so I guess a little like state fairs? I liked those, but it could be draining when it was crowded.

    You're welcome :)
     
  6. Sherlock77

    Sherlock77 Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Definitely passionate about it, my photography not the day job :) But even I have limits which I tend to push to the extreme sometimes

    And on that note, off to bed for me! :persevere:
     
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  7. Fridgemagnetman

    Fridgemagnetman Active Member

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    Relax take your camera and try and allow serendipity into your photography
     
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  8. Pariah Dog

    Pariah Dog Active Member

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    This bit made me laugh. I am also an Albertan and of all the things I have ever heard about the stampede, inspiring "nervous" is a new one. I see how it would make sense on an Aspie forum.
     
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  9. Momo

    Momo Active Larrikin

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    If I love something I tend to push myself too hard to, it only takes a short break usually then I'm back at it.
     
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  10. Katleya

    Katleya Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Hehe.
    I mean, it all makes sense now that it's been explained, but when I read "Calgary Stampede", I immediately pictured hordes of people charging towards me and trampling other people to death. Imagine the horror. So I'm glad to have learned it is not that kind of stampede ;)
     
    Last edited: Jul 16, 2017 at 4:46 PM
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  11. Sherlock77

    Sherlock77 Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Stampede is a common term for a rodeo/fair, we aren't the only ones to use the term
     
  12. Katleya

    Katleya Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    I did not know that & I'm glad I learned, thanks!
    Have you figured if you would go today?
     
  13. Sherlock77

    Sherlock77 Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    At this point maybe, I'm fighting a headache right now, it's 3:15 in the afternoon and starting to run out of usable time, starting to feel more like a failure this past week.

    The consolation prize? A musician friend is hosting a bit of a house warming of sorts for her new apartment plus perhaps a small music jam, may go to that, probably less stressful on my headache.
     
    Last edited: Jul 16, 2017 at 4:35 PM
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  14. Katleya

    Katleya Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    You have all my sympathy, as a chronic migraine sufferer.
    Don't feel like a failure. Don't look at what you haven't done, focus on what you did do this week. And if you end up not going, it's not a testament to a betrayal in your passion.
     
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  15. Grandmother B

    Grandmother B Active Member

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    It actually sounds like you got quite a bit done! If you are too exhausted, you won't do as good a job. I would rather do less and have it be my best than otherwise. I hope the pics you took turned out great! Don't be too hard on yourself.
     
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  16. S-Head

    S-Head Active Member

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    Yeehaw! Another Calgarian. I know it's probably too late, but if you get out there on the last day, maybe an idea is to try something different... for example try the beers from the local breweries (basement of the Big 4 building) and some of the "fancy" food they have only for Stampede. I tried the clam chowder poutine this year and it was awesome.
     
  17. Sherlock77

    Sherlock77 Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Over three days I was only there for seven hours in total... Also spent time on Stephen Avenue... Welcome to the forum, I'm somewhat new myself...
     
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  18. NicholRuth

    NicholRuth New Member

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    f
     
  19. Sherlock77

    Sherlock77 Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Thanks everyone for the comments, thinking some more (I'm probably over thinking at this point), my goal going in was to get there for five or six days, I only made it half way to that goal. Plus I was only there for a grand total of about seven hours.

    Several factors were out of my control, including my work schedule and quite a few very hot days.

    They talk about learning from experiences, I'm just trying to figure out what exactly I have learned, and I certainly don't disagree about some of the points made, but I've always struggled with a sense of "failure" when things don't go right - as it often happens, particularly with my photography. Other people seem to just shrug off stuff like that, I don't know how they do it.
     
  20. Katleya

    Katleya Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    If there's one thing I'm sure we'll agree on, it's that someone may look composed, but be going through utter chaos inside (at least I do, as an Aspie trying to survive in an NT world). But you know what? I have a feeling a lot of people do that, spectrum or not.

    I've been guilty of setting up goals that, looking back, were not realistic with what I could bear, and I've felt guilty about it too.
    But as you said: outside circumstances you couldn't foresee or control, so you're really not to blame for not keeping with your plan.

    How did the pictures come out, btw?