AnnaTheFox
New Member
If this is the wrong place mods feel free to move the thread.
Hello, have had a specific kind of recurrent experience and curious whether it's a kind of shutdown or if anyone has any other ideas. First things first, 30yo, professionally diagnosed with PTSD/MDD/GAD, abusive family of origin.
Suspect/self diagnoses ASD Asperger's subtype.
At times, especially when I was younger (up into my twenties), occasionally when highly stressed, during an argument or confrontation, body would kind of go limp (not to the point of falling over if seated), mind would run in circles around a specific statement I *wanted* to say, but mouth would not open. I simply could not speak. No force of God could compel me to do so, as I very deeply wanted to speak. My mind would simply run in circles until the argument was over, and the other person left me alone. Even then, this could take a significant amount of time after for me to "come back online", potentially in excess of maybe an hour (ball park, no idea for sure, not timing myself). Usually needed time alone/sleep after, as even though I was "back online", I was far from my best, usually very withdrawn.
I've read a number of different kinds of shutdowns, granted all are unique, some similar, some different.
Does this sound like a shutdown? Or is there a better explanation for this experience? Open to ideas, questions, thank you for the help.
Hello, have had a specific kind of recurrent experience and curious whether it's a kind of shutdown or if anyone has any other ideas. First things first, 30yo, professionally diagnosed with PTSD/MDD/GAD, abusive family of origin.
Suspect/self diagnoses ASD Asperger's subtype.
At times, especially when I was younger (up into my twenties), occasionally when highly stressed, during an argument or confrontation, body would kind of go limp (not to the point of falling over if seated), mind would run in circles around a specific statement I *wanted* to say, but mouth would not open. I simply could not speak. No force of God could compel me to do so, as I very deeply wanted to speak. My mind would simply run in circles until the argument was over, and the other person left me alone. Even then, this could take a significant amount of time after for me to "come back online", potentially in excess of maybe an hour (ball park, no idea for sure, not timing myself). Usually needed time alone/sleep after, as even though I was "back online", I was far from my best, usually very withdrawn.
I've read a number of different kinds of shutdowns, granted all are unique, some similar, some different.
Does this sound like a shutdown? Or is there a better explanation for this experience? Open to ideas, questions, thank you for the help.
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