Trippy_Wonka
Member
I’ve had my N for a little while now and I’ve been driving my girlfriend’s car. She’s often not in the car with me.
When I had my L I noticed that driving would put me in a very anxious state, which of course increases impulsivity and mutes my critical thinking.
Of course my driving has improved since then, and I’m usually pretty mindful behind the wheel, but I’m usually anxious without even realizing it
I also live in a city with a lot of selfish and impatient drivers and I regret to say it turned me into one
So today I had pulled over to let a car pass (narrow roads, cars parked each side, both of us are driving jeeps; we may have both fit but it’s not my car I don’t want to take the chance)
Car passes. Then another, then another. I’m at the crest of a hill so my window is only ever going to be narrow because of the blind spot. I’m starting to get anxious “oh god I’m never gonna get out of this spot” and a truck pulls up behind and then starts to pass me
This is too much for me and I honk “are you kidding me don’t block me in!” I start to pull out but the truck didn’t stop so I honk again “dude let me out can’t you see I’m stuck?” So I pull out in front of the truck
Then he turns on the red and blue lights
Don’t worry guys he made a reckless driver note and let me go
And when I immediately blew through a stop sign he didn’t pull me over again
The other thing that makes this tricky is that I didn’t tell my girlfriend right away. She had had a long day so I thought it would be better not to tell her. Then, as she was passing out she seemed…upset…so I asked if something was on her mind. She said, “no. Is something on yours?”
I couldn’t lie
So I cost her about an hour of sleep on top of all of it
So first lesson is, like the cop said, signal
Second one is be patient, not impulsive, and be sparing with the honks
Third one is to be forthright which I already knew but guys I do so much terrible stuff
I just wish I applied these lessons. Like I’m learning them, sure. But that’s nothing if I can’t apply it when it counts
Oh and also, she had to tell me to do an apology dinner. I didn’t even think of it. Running theme too. She had to ask for flowers the first time I got them for her and I constantly forget to get them for her. I just never think of stuff like this
There’s a lot to unpack here. I’m thinking about how to handle stress, perceived injustice and impulsivity when driving; and I’m thinking about how I can be a better boyfriend. It’s been a rough week in that department and the last month wasn’t exactly sunshine and rainbows
When I had my L I noticed that driving would put me in a very anxious state, which of course increases impulsivity and mutes my critical thinking.
Of course my driving has improved since then, and I’m usually pretty mindful behind the wheel, but I’m usually anxious without even realizing it
I also live in a city with a lot of selfish and impatient drivers and I regret to say it turned me into one
So today I had pulled over to let a car pass (narrow roads, cars parked each side, both of us are driving jeeps; we may have both fit but it’s not my car I don’t want to take the chance)
Car passes. Then another, then another. I’m at the crest of a hill so my window is only ever going to be narrow because of the blind spot. I’m starting to get anxious “oh god I’m never gonna get out of this spot” and a truck pulls up behind and then starts to pass me
This is too much for me and I honk “are you kidding me don’t block me in!” I start to pull out but the truck didn’t stop so I honk again “dude let me out can’t you see I’m stuck?” So I pull out in front of the truck
Then he turns on the red and blue lights
Don’t worry guys he made a reckless driver note and let me go
And when I immediately blew through a stop sign he didn’t pull me over again
The other thing that makes this tricky is that I didn’t tell my girlfriend right away. She had had a long day so I thought it would be better not to tell her. Then, as she was passing out she seemed…upset…so I asked if something was on her mind. She said, “no. Is something on yours?”
I couldn’t lie
So I cost her about an hour of sleep on top of all of it
So first lesson is, like the cop said, signal
Second one is be patient, not impulsive, and be sparing with the honks
Third one is to be forthright which I already knew but guys I do so much terrible stuff
I just wish I applied these lessons. Like I’m learning them, sure. But that’s nothing if I can’t apply it when it counts
Oh and also, she had to tell me to do an apology dinner. I didn’t even think of it. Running theme too. She had to ask for flowers the first time I got them for her and I constantly forget to get them for her. I just never think of stuff like this
There’s a lot to unpack here. I’m thinking about how to handle stress, perceived injustice and impulsivity when driving; and I’m thinking about how I can be a better boyfriend. It’s been a rough week in that department and the last month wasn’t exactly sunshine and rainbows