How do you handle changes in routine?

[Lilacleia16]

How do you handle changes in routine? I discuss it in my blog but I would love to hear your experiences.

 

[Rodafina]

For unexpected changes to routine in general, I try to plan on having different plans. I can have my primary plan and then a ideas for a couple of back up plans for the unpredictability of life. When a change to the routine surprises me, I try to give myself a few minutes to breathe deeply and process what is happening. If I am not alone, I'll retreat to the bathroom to do this. I remind myself that just because my routine didn't work out, it doesn't have to mean everything will be chaos.

 

[Judge]

Good question. I don't have many options at the moment. Just shot this from my balcony. Power, internet and cable are still viable...so it probably won't stop me from doing what I normally do.

 

[Misty Avich]

Change in routine doesn't bother me. Changes in my life that I can't control does bother me, unless it's good change.
I actually crave change generally. Like if we ever do move house, I'd be more excited than stressed. But when it's change that I know will affect me negatively or just something I wouldn't let happen if I had my way, then I can get very distressed and panicky. It's that helpless feeling of lack of control over a situation that just gets to me.

 

[Fino]

Primarily just suffer.

 

[Jumpinbare]

Primarily just suffer.

Agreed. Change is evil. Unless it's socks or underwear.

 

[Neonatal RRT]

I'm immersed in multiple interruptions to my tasks and thoughts throughout the day at work. Generally speaking, it doesn't begin to irritate me until later in the day when my mind is exhausted. I do enjoy the novelty of being able to get from point A to point B, or to complete a thought without disruptions.

 

[vergil96]

If you're speaking of daily rputine, then badly. I find it hard to figure out in which order to do everything needed on a daily basis and not to forget about e.g. food.

 

[AuroraBorealis]

I don't struggle much with changes in my daily routine. But I struggle very much with bigger life changes. Like moving house: Even though technically it's something exciting and positive, it absolutely terrifies me and puts me into a state of panic. Often, I block such topics completely. My partner started bringing up such topics from time to time, a long time before we actually plan on doing them, so I can slowly confront with the change, a bit at a time.

 

[Tom]

I think disliking changes in routine, or changes in general is one of the most common tendencies of autists.

For me, I try not to go down the (negative) emotional response road. Instead I stop and take some breaths, and use logic to convince myself this is always going to happen - unexpected changes are to be expected. And I also believe it is a sign of maturity to adjust and deal with it. So I might even mentally self shame myself and say 'ok, time to put on my big boy pants'. And at 65 I am still doing this. It is just what works for me.

 

[Lilacleia16]

I think disliking changes in routine, or changes in general is one of the most common tendencies of autists.

For me, I try not to go down the (negative) emotional response road. Instead I stop and take some breaths, and use logic to convince myself this is always going to happen - unexpected changes are to be expected. And I also believe it is a sign of maturity to adjust and deal with it. So I might even mentally self shame myself and say 'ok, time to put on my big boy pants'. And at 65 I am still doing this. It is just what works for me.

I think being autistic and highly functional means you have mastered the art of grit. Grit like gravel in the teeth that you continue to crunch as it breaks each tooth one by one. But true vulnerability and allowing yourself to take off that mask and admit that you don’t have to wear underpants feels a lot more freeing.

 

[vergil96]

I think being autistic and highly functional means you have mastered the art of grit. Grit like gravel in the teeth that you continue to crunch as it breaks each tooth one by one. But true vulnerability and allowing yourself to take off that mask and admit that you don’t have to wear underpants feels a lot more freeing.

Could you define what you mean by "highly functional"? Do you mean the division that used to be Asperger's vs autism and now is between people with a large disability sinca a young age vs those who have similar traits and might have their problems but aren't severely disabled like that? Or do you mean that a highly functioning person has a prestigous hard job, a family (minimal social problems) and stays on top of all that?

 

[Princess Viola]

Honestly, it just depends.

If I know I am going to have to change my routine, for one reason or another, and can prepare for it, I'm fine. But when a change in routine is thrust upon me without me being able to plan for it, then it just ruins everything.

 

[Misty Avich]

I didn't seem to mind change (as in surprises) when I was a child (another reason why I don't get why or how I was diagnosed with Asperger's). I remember when I was about 7 or 8 I came home from school one day to find my parents had changed my whole bedroom as a surprise.
They'd bought me a brand new bed which was high so had a ladder, and underneath the bed my toys were arranged in these lovely new storage boxes. I even had a new carpet, which was green (my favourite colour at the time), and the walls were repainted. They'd even bought me a new desk where all my art stuff was laid out nearly.
When I first saw it I was like the happiest child in the world. I loved it and was very grateful to my parents, and I promised to keep it nice and tidy. Uuuuunfortunately that promise only lasted about a week, as the room became messy without me really realising. You can't really expect a child to keep their room so neat and tidy - especially if they have lots of toys and ADHD. Lol

Also my parents often arranged sleepovers with my cousins as a surprise, and I can still remember the joy and excitement I felt when my mum would put her arm around me and say "guess who's staying over tonight?" Just pure happiness. Or when my dad would take us on a surprise trip to the seaside or even to a party. I remember one Sunday during the summer us kids felt bored, and my dad told us to get into the car to get some gas. We all groaned, until we saw that we were heading out of town and towards a distant relative's house where they had organised a party that was mostly child-centered. I remember feeling thrilled at the thought of a surprise social event.

 

[Jumpinbare]

I think disliking changes in routine, or changes in general is one of the most common tendencies of autists.

For me, I try not to go down the (negative) emotional response road. Instead I stop and take some breaths, and use logic to convince myself this is always going to happen - unexpected changes are to be expected. And I also believe it is a sign of maturity to adjust and deal with it. So I might even mentally self shame myself and say 'ok, time to put on my big boy pants'. And at 65 I am still doing this. It is just what works for me.

Yeah, I think most of us geezers and geezettes pretty much had to take this approach. I refuse to enjoy it however.

 

[Lilacleia16]

Could you define what you mean by "highly functional"? Do you mean the division that used to be Asperger's vs autism and now is between people with a large disability sinca a young age vs those who have similar traits and might have their problems but aren't severely disabled like that? Or do you mean that a highly functioning person has a prestigous hard job, a family (minimal social problems) and stays on top of all that?

By highly functioning I mean that my autism was masked and went undetected for my whole life until last month. It doesn’t mean I am not fully identified as autistic and it does not mean I can keep a job or maintain relationships because I can’t do either one. I am still 100% autistic I have just learned how to hide it. Asperger’s is an outdated term that is not used anymore. Now they just say you are somewhere on the spectrum and call all of it autism spectrum disorder and may give it level 1, 2 or 3. It’s my theory that some autistics struggle with right brain and are human calculators on the left brain, some struggle with left brain and are creative geniuses in their right brain and the last category are the most unfortunate in that they struggle on both brains but they have the purest souls and a childlike innocence that never goes away and they have a lot to teach the world about how to love purely because they bypass the brain and use their heart brain.

 

[vergil96]

By highly functioning I mean that my autism was masked and went undetected for my whole life until last month. It doesn’t mean I am not fully identified as autistic and it does not mean I can keep a job or maintain relationships because I can’t do either one. I am still 100% autistic I have just learned how to hide it. Asperger’s is an outdated term that is not used anymore. Now they just say you are somewhere on the spectrum and call all of it autism spectrum disorder and may give it level 1, 2 or 3. It’s my theory that some autistics struggle with right brain and are human calculators on the left brain, some struggle with left brain and are creative geniuses in their right brain and the last category are the most unfortunate in that they struggle on both brains but they have the purest souls and a childlike innocence that never goes away and they have a lot to teach the world about how to love purely because they bypass the brain and use their heart brain.

So you mean the level 1/2 by high functioning? In medicine "moderate" or "light" disorders mean just that you don't have a non-functional organ or something of that sort, it doesn't mean that life is easy with this disorder or that it doesn't impede your ability to work, maintain relationships etc. The terminiology is misleading for people aren't doctors very often.

"If you are level 1/2" it means you have mastered the art of grit" Hmmm. I guess it depends? For a lot of people on the spectrum it's true for sure. Especially those who mask and try to appear neurotypical.

 

[Lilacleia16]

So you mean the level 1/2 by high functioning? In medicine "moderate" or "light" disorders mean just that you don't have a non-functional organ or something of that sort, it doesn't mean that life is easy with this disorder or that it doesn't impede your ability to work, maintain relationships etc. The terminiology is misleading for people aren't doctors very often.

"If you are level 1/2" it means you have mastered the art of grit" Hmmm. I guess it depends? For a lot of people on the spectrum it's true for sure. Especially those who mask and try to appear neurotypical.

I am Level 1, not level 1/2. I have an official diagnosis of autism by an autism specialist that is a psychiatrist and neuropsychologist. Level 3 means lowest functioning. Here is an example:

Also my left brain is the side I struggle with so I do have the medical definition. It’s really rude to be so invalidating. I shouldn’t have to explain any of this.

 

[vergil96]

It’s really rude to be so invalidating.

I'm sorry that what I said came across this way to you. Could you explain why? I think we misunderstood each other.

To clarify:

I am Level 1, not level 1/2.

By using a slash "/" I meant either level 1 or level 2, obviously there is no such autism level like 1/2.

It wasn't clear to me that you were referring to yourself, you didn't use any words indicating that, and made general statements about all autistic people instead. I replied about all autistic people - there is great variety in this group, just like in any large group of people connected by having the same medial condition. This is what I meant by saying that it depends.

Hmmm. I guess it depends? For a lot of people on the spectrum it's true for sure. Especially those who mask and try to appear neurotypical.

That fragment also seems like a confirmation of your experience to me.

Level 3 means lowest functioning. Here is an example:

Yes, I know.

 

[Lilacleia16]

I'm sorry that what I said came across this way to you. Could you explain why? I think we misunderstood each other.

To clarify:


By using a slash "/" I meant either level 1 or level 2, obviously there is no such autism level like 1/2.

It wasn't clear to me that you were referring to yourself, you didn't use any words indicating that, and made general statements about all autistic people instead. I replied about all autistic people - there is great variety in this group, just like in any large group of people connected by having the same medial condition. This is what I meant by saying that it depends.


That fragment also seems like a confirmation of your experience to me.


Yes, I know.

I’m glad it was a misunderstanding.