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Friendship with an old flame - not there when needed

R

rainbow

Well-Known Member
I currently still hang out with an old flame of my mine, he still has feelings for me and I love him in my own special way however since I find socialising difficult I want to keep him close.

Lately I've been having some aspie related problems and just when I need him the most he isn't here for me (busy with his own life issues), and when he needs me I'm usually around. I'm feeling very left out and pushed aside, he knew the reason that I stayed over for a couple of days and the day that I returned home is when everything fell apart, it may seem that I'm treating him like a boyfriend however even as my friend, my definition of friends is that they call and check and see how are you? Isn't it a little strange that even 30 seconds for a text and 1 minute for a phone call can't be made...

I've been going through this issue by myself, no friends or nearby family support and thus this is why I can be very dependent on him at times.
 
Hmm, I've found that in my life most people aren't there when you actually need them. As an aspie, I think I'm always there when someone needs me as I can't be deceptive and manipulative like NT's can.

I suppose aspies can be this too, but for me it's too much hasstle and I don't want to do it. It's pointless. But, I have been let down by so-called friends in the past.

Dont know if this helps at all(!)
 
I wasn't there for my ex after we became friends. I don't know that I could be friends, I tried when she came back, it was too hard.
 
Thank you to you both, I relate to that Tarragon, I don't do it because of my aspergers just being who I am I understand that the world isn't a pretty place and why not help others is my attitude.
 
Hey, I can relate to this quite a bit. I had a friend who I was very close with who I was always there for, and they didn't make the effort to be there for you. Its really upsetting to not have that person to rely on :/ I hope it works out for you.
 
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