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Recent content by JKG

  1. JKG

    Negotiating needs between AS/NT partners

    Amazing, wise, and helpful, Mia. Thank you so much.
  2. JKG

    Negotiating needs between AS/NT partners

    Thanks for the kind words, Rocco. They mean a lot right now. No, my partner has never joined such a site, and we live in an area that doesn't have such support groups available for adults. My partner has learned, via the 3 months of therapy, that my aspie traits carry no intentional motives of...
  3. JKG

    Negotiating needs between AS/NT partners

    Yeah, sadly, after 3 months of therapy, my NT partner of 10 years wants out--so we are breaking up. I couldn't change enough for her, and she just couldn't depersonalize it when my aspie traits would pop out. She felt like I was disregarding her as a personal slight. That was not my intention at...
  4. JKG

    Asperger's and Fashion

    I'm very much the same. I've never had any fashion sense, nor much concern about it. I like simple clothes am fine wearing similar things day after day. In fact, I have to write down what I wear on a calendar so that I don't repeat the same thing too often--since apparently repeating outfits in...
  5. JKG

    How did you get diagnosed?

    For me, it's all been done via a therapist with an expertise in ASD over about 4 months of weekly one-hour sessions. She said I could pay something like $2,500 (I live in the western U.S.) to see a psychiatrist and go through a battery of tests, but her written diagnosis is enough for me to get...
  6. JKG

    Secrecy vs Disclosure

    I'm wrestling with whether and who to tell, and doing some experimenting around that right now. It certainly has helped for my partner to know--although we aren't going to stay together, sadly, because she doesn't want to live with someone with aspie traits. At least the diagnosis let her know...
  7. JKG

    Yoga, Stimming & Soothing

    I just started attending yoga classes on the suggestion of my therapist. It has helped me in many ways--with emotional control, with stress, and even with helping my brain multitask the various body positions. It stretches me in more ways than physically--and yet in a calming way. I've added it...
  8. JKG

    The benefits of finding out later in life that you are an aspie

    Receiving a diagnosis at age 50 has certainly helped me explain and understand my lifelong quirks better. While there were downsides to receiving a diagnosis late, perhaps one of the upsides was being forced to make up my own set of adaptations to survive. Yes, it is a mask, a performance, but...
  9. JKG

    Any household chores you like?

    I like vacuuming and mowing lawns. Okay, not the noise-part (I wear headphones to block that). I find the physical back and forth pattern, and walking in long circular paths soothing and meditative. And it is easy to see an immediate result.
  10. JKG

    Negotiating needs between AS/NT partners

    I'd like to add one more question to my query here: Does anyone have any advice or stories about how to deal with an NT partner who perceives your aspie traits (i.e. executive functioning challenges, or socializing differences, for example) as a personal slight or as lack of love? Even though...
  11. JKG

    Negotiating needs between AS/NT partners

    My NT partner and I have been experiencing challenges clearly expressing our needs (emotional, communication-based, sharing space, scheduling, vacationing, socializing, etc.) to one another and negotiating solutions. My therapist suggested that I seek stories and advice from other aspies and...
  12. JKG

    Extremely Secretive

    Yeah, I can relate to this, too. My partner often offers to help me organize my office or help me go through boxes in storage. But I don't want anyone else going through or moving my stuff. And I like to have just-me things, too. I really don't like anything in my personal spacial areas to be...
  13. JKG

    Male vs. Female Aspies

    I agree with Progster. Female aspies may be better at "passing" due to social performance skills. And there may be less tolerance given to female aspies because women are expected to be social caretakers. The quiet lone independent man can be seen (at least in the U.S.) as a sort of mysterious...
  14. JKG

    Favorite Aspie-expressive song?

    Thanks for posting this one, SameStars. I had not heard of this song or group before, but it has quickly become a new favorite. Can't stop playing it.
  15. JKG

    Age of Diagnosis

    I started suspecting AS was at the root of some of my social challenges and meltdowns around age 46. Being gay and androgynous complicated my self diagnosis because being non-conforming in other ways like that can also lead to social ostracization and not fitting in with groups. I was officially...
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