Would you feel discriminated by this?

[Kit]

Lets say you had very bad social skills. You go on a forum and people don't like your posts and the threads you start. You try and contribute to the forum but people don't seem to like what you say and you don't see anything different you're doing. Even the mods have gotten on your back about how you post and you have explained to everyone there you have AS and your social skills aren't good. But people still don't give a flying **** and expect you to learn but you are just clueless because you don't know what to change. Then finally you get banned.

Would you think you were banned for having autism and you were discriminated? Would you think they don't like autistic people?


I can imagine this is how some people on the spectrum would feel if this happened to them.

 

[Ana54]

It happened to me in the Myst community. Then I crashed their convention... after I was banned from about 10 of their boards. Then they banned me from the rest.


I remember that I made a comment on a memorial site for a dead girl saying that maybe her murderer apologized to her in the afterlife. They got SO SO SO mad at me; ranting raving roaring mad. Called me sick, told me I had to learn tact and respect FAST (yeah, but you don't have to be tactful and respectful, just me, right? Then they started saying they should call the cops on me when I said a few other things about the murderer and why people do what he did. The dead girl's mother and aunt were very nice, but her friends were BRATS of the highest level. The girl who died was seemingly perfect, but she neglected to teach her friends about empathy, I guess. They called the killer a shithead, but at least they didn't call me a shithead, though they treated me like I was. Horrible comments, and the scary thing is, they were right from the heart. They don't realize that there are good and bad people on both eneds of that spectrum and that, as S.E. Hinton says in her book Outsiders, "Things are rough all over."


What made me mad was that, there they sat picking on me, because they were unhappy and needed someone to pick on. and these aren't little 13-year-olds; these are either high school grads or college/university students.

 

[poodlepiglet]

deleted

 

[142857]

I seem to have problems relating to people in real life. Not so much on web forums, where I can read back over what I have just written before I hit the "post" button. Or where I can spend an hour or 2, or a day or 2, thinking up something appropriate to type, as opposed to having to come up with something immediately as in real life.

 

[Kit]

This happened to an autistic guy at another forum I go to. I don't know how bad his autism his but he seemed smart but he had very poor spelling and terrible grammar. I thought he was doing baby talk because well it was an adult baby/teen baby forum. I am sure others thought he was too because he was getting negative rep and he explained he tends to get into regressive mode so it makes it hard for him to spell. But people told him to stay off the forum when he gets that way and we are to speak maturely. He can do baby talk in the role playing or in PM. When he acted that way, he seemed less intelligent.

So he kept getting negative rep and he was finally banned when it got to -14. He came back under another account and had in his profile saying he probably didn't make himself clear. He wrote he has autism and he is disabled so he can't spell and will never be able to because of the way his brain processes language. He said he would never learn how to spell so there is no point in asking him to learn. He said because of his autism, he also has difficulty with other aspects of communication and conceptualization and he didn't think it was fair to ban him over his spelling issues that are caused by his disability. He got banned again because no one is allowed to make alternate accounts and once you're banned, you can't make another one.


That forum I go to is pretty strict and they don't give a flying **** if you have a disability that keeps you from spelling or if you don't understand things you do there or don't understand what you are saying wrong. They expect you to use spell check. They expected him to stay off the forum when he regresses and I do agree there. They also have a strict rule on giving out reputation and taking it. That way people don't abuse it. Reputation also keeps out bullshitters and spammers and it makes people contribute to the community than making short responses like "I disagree" and not say why and when your reputation gets too low, you're out. It also makes people think before they say. So reputation does matter and it's not just a number. The more you have, the more features you get. If you go down to negative, the mods watch you and if your neg rep gets too low, they ban you. There are lot of aspies there but they don't have bad reputation. At least two of them are mods there.

This incident reminds me of the time at WP about a member who had seizures and she claimed it causes her to post attacks and every attack she post, it was during her "seizures" and at least two of the mods said she used it as an excuse and she was told to stay off the forum when she is in one of those phases. But she didn't listen. She was finally banned I heard. I wasn't surprised because I figured she was and she was at the edge of it I remember. Well at this other forum I go to, this fella was told to stay off the forum when he goes into regressive mode. His spelling was more clear when he wouldn't be in regressive mode so I have troubles buying what he wrote in his profile under his alt. account. I would ask him to explain himself but he is banned so I will never know. I felt sorry for him and felt it was unfair what happened. I am sure he feels discriminated against his disability or thinks people didn't understand him. He did make a post under his new account but one of the mods deleted it which irritated me because I didn't get to read what he wrote.

 

[superboyian]

That's actually happened to me before actually funny enough, I was at a good forum or MSN Groups and basically I was banned for being autistic or something when I had mentioned that, I personally thought that was discrimination and I was truly upset at the time and I tried to get into the group but no luck, yet I could of created a new account but then they somehow figured that was me and this was like somewhere in 2005.

From what it looked like, I don't seem to believe that these forums just don't give a damn, was it one of those gaming forums?

And the one on WP, it's like the mods are unware of things like that, but then I never thought that having a seizure would make you type things that you didn't write down and it would be obvious that the mods there didn't know anything about that, I should look into that.

 

[Sipe]

Reading these posts makes me sad. Its so sad that there are so many corrupted bad people in this world. I haven`t have those kinds of experiences, luckily, since this is the very first forum I have joined in. And I made the right choice to join here.

Just don`t mind them. They are corrupted. If they stay like that, their lives won`t be so happy and great than they had wished for.

I`m happy to be here.

 

[Emor]

Honestly one's going to have to define 'poor social skills'.
Having poor social skills can have an effect on your personality definitely.
I've been to many forums where you'll be banned for your personality.
Being perceived as insensitive and such can make you seem like having a bad personality.
I wouldn't feel discriminated against tbh. I'd not really want to be at such a forum.
I was banned when I was younger from forums 'cause of probably my personality(I wasn't controversial or w.e like I am now, it's complex) but meh.
I personally have banned people from forums for their personality. They'd lie(not small stuff- stuff like running away from home), make snide remarks to everyone, and generally just be an asshole. Everyone else wants these people banned. But I genuinely think some people can't help it or don't know.
Same with the way people can hate people with autism.
I've been banned from other forums for my personality in the past year or so as well but I think it's been a beneficial experience. Then again I'm way too close-minded to think for a second they were justified .
EMZ=]

 

[Kit]

That's actually happened to me before actually funny enough, I was at a good forum or MSN Groups and basically I was banned for being autistic or something when I had mentioned that, I personally thought that was discrimination and I was truly upset at the time and I tried to get into the group but no luck, yet I could of created a new account but then they somehow figured that was me and this was like somewhere in 2005.

From what it looked like, I don't seem to believe that these forums just don't give a damn, was it one of those gaming forums?

And the one on WP, it's like the mods are unware of things like that, but then I never thought that having a seizure would make you type things that you didn't write down and it would be obvious that the mods there didn't know anything about that, I should look into that.

Her name was triangular trees. Do a search for her name. It is actually a she but she has her gender set to Male.

The forum I was at, it's a fetish forum for teens and adults. Half of the users there have autism/AS but yet an autistic man got banned from there. About two of the mods there have AS. I read through his posts and he said he has AS. Then he called himself autistic in his other posts.

 

[superboyian]

Reading these posts makes me sad. Its so sad that there are so many corrupted bad people in this world. I haven`t have those kinds of experiences, luckily, since this is the very first forum I have joined in. And I made the right choice to join here.

Just don`t mind them. They are corrupted. If they stay like that, their lives won`t be so happy and great than they had wished for.

I`m happy to be here.

Woooooo Aspergic rocks then if this is your very first! :thumbsup:

Most places you'd find is corrupted, especially alot of gaming forums, I've been to many of them and so far they just love to gang up on a newbie. Ouch, fortunately, I was lucky to avoid that. :lol:

 

[Kit]

Don't come to I2. When you're a newbie, one of the first things they ask is "Are you a sensitive type person?" Never answer "yes" to that because they like to scare off newbies by being a jerk to them. But some do stay. I learn you have their respect when you are tough and have a thick skin. They think being mean to people toughens them up. it's true in some cases because it's worked with me. You learn to not give a **** anymore because there will always be mean people out there so why let them get to you? Why let your day get ruined when someone yells "asshole" out their car window to you? Besides when you show your tough side and not care, people tend to back off. I also noticed you sometimes gain peoples respect when you show you don't care what they say to you so they back off and leave you alone.

This is what I learned in my adulthood. Don't let these jerks get to me. I admit I was sensitive earlier because of what happened at WP and with a troll we got here and what happened with me and my new old friend. I was vulnerable then. I notice very sensitive people seem to attract jerks and trolls so my advice to people who have problems in their life and are very vulnerable and sensitive, don't show it. Play the tough guy and don't whine about your issues too much and all the time. But some people, such as me, can still see through that and know they are actually sensitive people and they do care what is said to them but they are just playing the tough guy. So you might still get a bully once on a while because they happened to see through.

 

[Ruby_Aspergic]

Forums aren't public property. They belong to the owners, and the owners have the right to remove anyone they don't like. Unfortunately they didn't like you. It's not always easy to be friends with people like us. That's a shame, but I don't really think it can be held against them.

 

[Emor]

Forums aren't public property. They belong to the owners, and the owners have the right to remove anyone they don't like. Unfortunately they didn't like you. It's not always easy to be friends with people like us. That's a shame, but I don't really think it can be held against them.

+1.
EMZ=]

 

[Kit]

Forums aren't public property. They belong to the owners, and the owners have the right to remove anyone they don't like. Unfortunately they didn't like you. It's not always easy to be friends with people like us. That's a shame, but I don't really think it can be held against them.

It didn't happen to me, it happened to someone else.

 

[umbrellabeach]

That's never happened to me, but if it did I would feel very discriminated against.

 

[Shiroi Tora]

OK....Am I going to be discriminated for solely being NT here or for my actions or words that may seem to have some evil intent or some negative effect?

People, in general, are concerned with results. Unless the motive is quite clear and quite innocent...and not repeated once talked with...most are forgiving.

To discriminate is to use critical reasoning...to unjustifiably discriminate is wrong. It all lies in the virgin reason. If the actions of the person are unjustifiable, they should expect to be corrected. If the actions of the person are justifiable, they should expect to be treated accordingly...with justice.

Most people I have met, generally try to give the benefit of doubt to the offender.

There are willfully stupid people out there...you needn't waste your time with them.

 

[chinaberry]

Only if they know you have autism, and they're treating you badly, despite your own good behaviour, because they have some sort of personal prejudice against the autism. If you were doing something provocative, then no, that's not discriminatory at all! I wouldn't assume that anyone was banning me for being autistic unless they told me, "I'm banning you for being autistic". I just wouldn't think of it like that. Not banning me for the stigma of autism, but maybe for my actions, which are obviously influenced by autism. If it's because of the stigma- purely because of the AS label, then yes, be angry, but it's only the internet. NTs wouldn't behave like that to your face- they'd show it in underhand ways that we wouldn't notice- win/win.

There was a user on TSR (student room) who made a few pretty embarrassing posts, nothing crazy, but people laughed at him and stuff. I'd talked to him a bit through PMs, just generally, and autism came up and, sure enough, he did have Aspergers, which I'd suspected anyway. But the people didn't know he did, they just thought he was a 'troll' or something, bent on making annoying posts for the sake of it. So that wasn't discrimination either, it was just people getting fed up. That's what the whole social exclusion thing of AS is about.