What do you find hardest?

[regnkappa]

I used to overthink every tiny detail in every situation i was in, to the extent of causing my own anxiety. I still do, but having Willow has built my confidence quite a lot, I don't need to have my guard up around her or think hard at all about what I'm going to say or do.

I can think that its very nice to have a person like that around . To be able to use ones brain to other things then overthinking detail in everything.

couse there is quite alot of more fun things to use ones brains for. specialy in social situations I think.

 

[Chris]

Heh, i never actually considered proportioning my brains 'resources' in social situations, so to speak. Cool.

 

[OmegaGreen17]

What I find the hardest, is not the work, its the fact that sometimes, I wake up, feeling terrible mentally...

Things get the extreme sometimes, it can be dangerous... somewhat..

Easily however, I find understanding people the HARDEST:

Body Language
SOME Jokes
Some forms of humour
If they are angry with me
If a girl likes me (How bloody likely, haha :/)

 

[rikk]

Dealing with people has given me the most problems over the years, my worldview must be

a lot different than most peoples.

People got mad at me for not saying much so I started talking.then they'd tell me to keep my mouth shut.

I would be encouraged to join in and participate and then get chased off by the same people.

Go figure.

 

[regnkappa]

Dealing with people has given me the most problems over the years, my worldview must be

a lot different than most peoples.

People got mad at me for not saying much so I started talking.then they'd tell me to keep my mouth shut.

I would be encouraged to join in and participate and then get chased off by the same people.

Go figure.

Its so wierd. "they" set the rules. "they" never try to follow our rules every once and a while or at least respect our rules/ways.

 

[142857]

Hardest thing is normal social interactions with people. I can stand up in front of an audience and sing, or I can run a bit IT workshop with a room full of managers and senior consultants, or I can prepare a course and stand up in front of 20 people and deliver it over the course of a week. People think I'm shy, but obviously I am not. I just struggle to interact socially. I worked out years back that the best way to talk to girls was to ask them where they wanted to travel to. That way you just had to sit there and listen for the next hour. And afterwards they would remember what a great conversationalist you were.

Time management and concentration are the other things that have always caused me problems - I have symptoms similar to ADD, but now I'm pretty sure that they are a symptom of AS.

 

[adelaideman29]

This question is directed at anyone with aspergers. What do you find hardest about your life, which is thought to be due to aspergers? Do you have anxiety issues, or what imparticular do you struggle with in social situations?

Hi, for it's a few things but i'll just say for now that i can have anxiety and when i do it comes in waves of high and lows waves. like talking to people at my job thats high i can't even get a few words in without looking wiredso i try not to talk to much around them. But i find sometimes when i just want to go to the video shop or something like it anxiety can be high too i think about going and who i might run into or what kind of people wil be there and i get anxiety from it when i get like that it can take about 30mins just to make a discesion to go and normal when i get there i don't like to be talked to i'm in my own world.

 

[Carl Carter]

Other people are what I find most difficult Odd thing is I gave up on pretty much everything long before my AS diagnosis, and now I'm so used to avoiding everything I feel kind of stuck. Haven't really got a clue if I'll ever be able to get my life back, but, I dunno, guess I don't really care one way or the other. The older you get the quicker time seems to pass; suppose it already feels too late, and it's just a matter of waiting.

Life then, is very difficult, because as someone else pointed out, the world runs according to NT rules, and we're expected to fit into a hole that we simply aren't shaped for. So I refuse to try.

 

[umbrellabeach]

Definitely other people. I'm a little better at social interaction now than I was a few years ago, but sometimes I'll just have a casual conversation or small talk with someone and halfway through I'll be sweating just because I feel so awkward. Sometimes I get like that even when I'm in the same room as other people, even if we're not talking. People often make noises that irritate me too, like in the morning I'll hear slamming doors and stuff like that and I hate it. That's one of the reasons I don't want to get married; too much noise! Sometimes my family will try to be quiet, but even that doesn't work because I can hear everything that goes on in this house. I'll be in my room with both doors shut and be able to hear my parents talking in the dining room or my brothers laughing downstairs.
And then there's all the punishment I've endured simply for being different and speaking my mind, but I won't go into details.

 

[chinaberry]

Making close friendships- always had friends, I've been lots of people's 'best friend' but yeah, I've never had a best friend in the real sense. Boyfriends, I can't stand being attached to people like that. I hate them casually hugging and kissing me. I know this is supposed to be normal behaviour but it's just not something I find easy to accept like that.
At the moment walking- dyspraxia/general Aspie clumsiness- I find it really hard to walk in the street, in school. Probably stems from feeling self concious, which everyone does, I suppose. Every little movement sends me off balance. So if I jerk my head I trip over. It's all in the mind though! Discipline. I count in my head and if it's really bad then I just count to two over and over.
Dealing with change, I suppose. Although moving schools has been great, not bad at all. I do get a bit nervous making sure I set off at the same time every morning, I get a bit unsettled if I have a free first and I set off later than usual, but it's okay.

 

[Ana54]

Understimulation-- STILL!

 

[Sean2222]

I find that if I focus too much on my obsessions I lose track of everything else. It used to be a lot worse though. I have lost interest in a lot of my obsession now.

It's a double edged sword though. Either lsoe myself in the obsessions and foprget about everyone/everything around me or come out of the obsessions and get even more dperessed because without the obsessions I have nothing to eistract myself or fool myself into thinking i have any happiness or control period. Then I tend to see the negativity a whole lot more easily and it isn't pretty.

 

[chinaberry]

Relations with the parents- blazing rows etc.
This lunchtime's stage was set for an episode of "She's so argumentative". Booing ensued, from even the actors themselves.
Honestly, my parents just don't know what AS is. They'll ask me something, I'll take it too literally, they'll call me argumentative and evasive and difficult, when I don't know what they're actually asking me! They just blow up so easily and call me all sorts of names which I'd deserve if I didn't have Aspergers and if I was doing it on purpose! Or suddenly, if I look out of the window and my mum says something like 'eat up', I'll start eating faster, and they'll call me rude because I didn't acknowledge it by saying something or because I didn't look round. It's stupid. I don't get what they mean.

 

[Sean2222]

There are so many things I find hard. Wow, and many were touched upon by just a few people on this thread. Not much I can add other than to say sometimes it is our weaknesses that make us stronger and make us even more unique. I would not trade them to be normal. And I certainly wouldn't give away fmy strengths because they are really cool and I don't know who I would be without them. I would not trade anythign to be some other person. I just wish I could trade the end results for true happiness, love, and romance Those are the hardest things to live without, reaching for and never actually pulling them in...

-sean-