Opposing Opinions - Why Do They Bother Me So Much?

[Newt]

Hello, just thought I'd bring up discussion about an issue that's been troubling me for some time. It's basically the act of getting triggered or sensitive over an opposing opinion that may be expressed quite harshly. Sometimes I get afraid to like something of a high popularity that despite having a large fandom, also has a rather big hatedom opposing it. Basically, if I see somebody bashing something I enjoy over the internet, I kind of feel like it's an attack on me for so much as being a fan, especially with statements like "it's made for low-IQ retards" or "you must be an idiot to like this" and so on.

Let's say an RPG-series like The Elder Scrolls for example, notably Skyrim. Obviously it's very popular, even if that isn't a instant indicator of high-quality (look at the Transformers movies for example), it's got a great deal of people that like it. I love it for it's exploration, art design, customisation, and just generally the large amount of stuff there is to do. What other game let's me roam around a detailed fantasy world as a walking lizard that slays dragons and raids bandit camps? It's a brilliant escapist fantasy for me, even if there's lots of things in it that could be done better. I think it's the style of gameplay in general that I enjoy so much, since I love other open-world titles like the Grand Theft Auto series, Fallout 3/New Vegas, Red Dead Redemption e.g (however, I disliked Fallout 4, which was so disappointingly dumbed down it wasn't even funny).

So even if I acknowledge the fact that there are objective flaws with such a game, why is it that I get sensitive when such facts are presented? If I were to give an example, it would be various discussion boards dedicated to the more "hardcore" style of RPG. and this piece here. It does make some compelling arguments in contrast to the high praise, but I think it's the cynical tone of it's writing and refusal to acknowledge any positives that makes me uneasy. People also like to state that the game is only good with mods, even though I've managed to get hundreds of hours out of it without them, so I fail to see how that really holds true.

I've also been like this with consoles from time to time. Even though I prefer PlayStation, that doesn't mean I dislike any other console. However, there would be times on the past where I'd stumble upon some pro-Xbox channel on YouTube, with a rather extreme anti-Sony rhetoric from both the person running the channel and those commenting on the videos. Obviously such channels are designed to attract such extremism, but for whatever reason I still find myself looking it up rather than wisely avoiding it.

Obviously this is a little extreme, since the internet is what it is and not everything posted should be taken seriously. In short, it's basically just an issue of getting triggered by people not liking stuff I like, and coming off as condescending elitists who think their opinion is fact. I just want to know if anyone else here has felt like this?

 

[Judge]

Many of us share it. I do too.

It's just one of many Aspie traits- to be excessively argumentative. A difficult one to subdue.

 

[Mia]

There will be and are periods in life in which you need to prove yourself. Doing so under these circumstances helps you to understand and write or verbalize what you think. To make clear to yourself and others whats important to you. To have an opinion, to have arguments, discussions, to win and to lose. To make mistakes or not make mistakes and learn from each of them.

One thing to keep in mind, is that your caring about something whether it be a game, a book, a concept, a piece of music, a philosophy, is quite specific to you for personal reasons. They are ideas, and the idea if criticized, is not a denunciation of you as an individual. It's the idea which manifests as a game that someone doesn't like.

Yet not being impartial in their opinions makes the person seem biased one way or another. Being extreme and one sided in their criticism is a rather usual device to generate readership, create controversy and fuss. Bias creates more drama than impartiality or fairness. It seems a disease of many sites.

 

[Stitch]

I've found that in conflicts -verbal, internet, or otherwise -that I'm pretty much a sponge when it comes to the extremities of emotions displayed. This doesn't mean I agree with either side -simply that I can see where everyone's coming from and it's hard to cope with multiple perspectives at once. (Still not sure why people say we're not empathetic ...the problem is emotional expression, not the emotions themselves.)

As a result, I avoid conflict as much as possible, because when I'm caught in the middle, or on one of the sides being attacked, I end up paralyzed and three-quarters of the way to a sensory shutdown. It doesn't matter if I have a dozen valid, logical reasons to defend my position, if someone becomes belligerent I become frozen. I can deal with issues if they are approached in a rational manner, and if the other person is genuinely interested in learning different opinions or how to fix a problem ...but that situation is rare.

So I try to cope as well as I can. In this day and age of people being offended by pretty much everything, usually what that means is that I stay off news sites or social media. If I need to handle the day-to-day problems that arise, I cannot look at anything more controversial than the day's weather forecasts.

I simply cannot understand why people get so hung up on things that, in the long run, simply aren't important -like which gaming console is better. Pick your favorite -it doesn't matter -and make friends. Not enemies.

 

[Idahocalypse]

I understand that it's really difficult to handle when someone criticizes a special interest. I used to break down and cry whenever anyone criticized one of my interests. But over the years, I learned that if you get upset over someone's opinion, you're basically giving away your power to them, which is probably what they want. And just because their opinion is different than yours doesn't necessarily make them right. That kind of thinking means that you're not giving yourself enough credit.

Don't get sad that someone criticized something you love, instead try to channel your feelings of frustration into feelings of protectiveness, and that will only reinforce your love for your interest and make it even more special to you.