How in the world to function in a NT world

[Robby]

I don't for the life of me understand why everyone assumes and by everyone I mean NT's, that once you become 18, you're somehow not autistic any more. Everyone talks about autism all the time as it relates to kids. Well, autism doesn't magically disappear when you become an adult. And if you were only diagnosed in the last year or so like me, you've wasted about 10-15 years of your adult life not working because of symptoms that go along with autism, which for me were depression, anxiety, crippling self-doubt, and ptsd from bullying. When I was in school in the 1990s nobody talked about autism at all. Now, they talk about it a lot but only concerning kids. Wtf?? Autism is autism, I'm 33 and have it, I've probably had it my whole life. It was just not caught. Because this is the case with many adults with autism, (I have a fairly mild case), many of us have absolutely NO idea how to function as an adult and do things like go to work, maintain our lives, finances, etc. This is a huge problem. For me, therapy helps but what I find myself wanting and wishing I had earlier was better life skills training. I tend to do terrible when I have no structure. I just withdraw and retreat into my own world, and with no accountability, I just live out my days in seclusion. My family is supportive of me, but they have no idea about autism and just assume that since I am grown, I'm lazy or something. People just don't get it. Autism isn't something you can turn on or off it has varying symptoms. My symptoms vary between severe anxiety and depression, self-doubt, and rebellion. And I am frustrated a lot about my position in life. I know I have a lot of skills to offer, but I have no idea about how to put them to use. And the jobs I see out there either require ridiculous amounts of education and experience, which I do not have, or just wouldn't suit my personality. Add being gay on top of all that, and it means I go through a ton of self doubt all the time. I wish I had a life coach or something to help me set goals for myself and a plan, and help hold me accountable until I can start reaching my goals, and also teach me how to function in a NT world. This would help a lot. But there is no such thing. So I just keep feeling lost.

 

[anon2621]

I can relate... I'm 22 and just got diagnosed with Aspergers this month. Try and find yourself a therapist who specializes in autism. It's irritating how autism awareness focuses more on children. I wouldn't be surprised if there are thousands upon thousands of undiagnosed aspies out there.

 

[Robby]

I can't seem to find a therapist specializing in autism. I am seeing a psychiatrist at a practice that accepts my insurance, and the therapist there is nice enough, but she can't see me but once a month or so, and I don't feel I'm getting much benefit from it. I have trouble getting past the idea of opening up to someone being paid to listen to my issues. She's a nice lady, but I don't feel any benefit from it. I'm still trying to get my depression under control and feel I need life skills how to manage in the every day real world, and nobody has ever taught me this stuff.

 

[Manuheleku]

I can't seem to find a therapist specializing in autism. I am seeing a psychiatrist at a practice that accepts my insurance, and the therapist there is nice enough, but she can't see me but once a month or so, and I don't feel I'm getting much benefit from it. I have trouble getting past the idea of opening up to someone being paid to listen to my issues. She's a nice lady, but I don't feel any benefit from it. I'm still trying to get my depression under control and feel I need life skills how to manage in the every day real world, and nobody has ever taught me this stuff.

I can relate, I don't do well with talk therapy. Ironically, my general practitioner is the only one that did me any good with a low dosage of meds to keep me level. I pretty much give up on a diagnosis, my insurance sucks.

 

[Robby]

I got a diagnosis after testing, but my problem now is I can't find a job and have no idea of life and coping skills. I am extremely frustrated and depressed.

 

[NTgirl4276]

When I was in school in the 1990s nobody talked about autism at all. Now, they talk about it a lot but only concerning kids. Wtf??

i definitely agree with you that ASD is generally not talked about enough in terms of adults--to absolutely detrimental effects.

i wonder if this is strategic, on the part of advocates and organizations that are hoping to raise awareness of ASD.

i teach persuasion, and some theories of argument suggest that persuasion is not about changing someone's mind, but about meeting their mind where it already is. in other words: you figure out what your audience ALREADY cares about, and then show them how a new topic/idea simply applies to those values/beliefs/attitudes that already reside in their brain.

that being said, one of the most universal values is the care and protection of children. we tend to be more concerned about the welfare of children than of fellow adults, perhaps because children are often seen as innocents. i wonder if ASD advocates tend to talk about "children with autism" more because it activates this common protection/compassion impulse in general audiences and, theoretically, might grab their interest in ASD more than if they talk about "adults with autism."

of course, the inevitable byproduct of that strategy is the implication that autism is more common among children than adults--or, worse yet, that autism doesn't affect adults at all. a classic case of well-intentioned argument with wildly problematic implications

 

[Etzelaire]

I've got the problem of disaproving most things about society. I don't understand how we are tought this way and why we have to work eight hours to survive four. I don't want to watch my life pass while I'm at work that's not a life worth living in my opinion so sometimes I get very very upset even think about smashing the car against the rocks while driving.
Damn it's so frustrating that we have to follow patterns based on ********.
I am earning money now, but just to spend it all in an attempt to make on of my ideas become real and see if, as I think, it will be profitable.