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Gidday..

What was the hardest thing for you when you left home?

  • He'll be ok

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  • He'll need some help

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Waltsingmatilda

Waltsingmatilda

Active Member
Hi I just joined to see if I can be a better mum to my aspie son and a better wife to my darling aspie hubby. I am hoping to learn from you and hopefully understand my family better. My son starts uni next year and I worry about him. I am not aspie, but I am a loving mum. Can you tell me if he should be alright? He is going to uni and living on campus. What experiences did you have?
 
Welcome
I'm from OZ as well. I went to uni and just loved it. Best years of my life. I studied visual arts majoring in conceptual art (installation) and printmaking. It worked for me because as an Aspie I took it as a routine (saw it as a job), I scheduled and mapped out my day and that really worked for me. I didn't get into the social scene because it wasn't my thing and that kept me focused on my tasks without being distracted. My favourite subject was 'philosophy of visual aesthetics', just loved it.
Have faith that your son will love it as well. It will be a great learning experience for him :)
 
Even without ASD adding another variable, college success is a case-by-case sort of thing. I found out about my ASD after significant social struggles in college and extreme depression. But if you and your husband are there for your son, he should be able to adjust well enough. Just make sure you check in on him from time to time.

Welcome to AspiesCentral.
 
Welcome :)

I'm also from Australia; from Brisbane. I'm at uni at the moment too, and I must admit it's quite challenging, but I live at home, and not on campus. I don't think I could ever board with another stranger, personally.

It's hard to say how he'll react, as AS can affect people differently. It would possibly help if you could tell us how he is normally, when outside his comfort zone, and how he manages with other people.
 
Hi everyone thanks for your comments it's already been helpful. Vanilla, my boy spends a lot of time in his room, he manages his study and break time really well. He is doing extremely well at school and has no problems with keeping a routine. Like most people I know with aspergers, his social life is non existent, he is happier in the house and on the computer. We encourage him to walk the dog each night and go to the gym at least 3 times a week. He chose the uni because of its quiet country feel it had. He will have to do everything for himself and find his way around Perth. I took him down there for a 'introduction' to his new life and have called on both the uni and disability services to support him. When he is overburdened with work he has trouble prioritising his workload, doesn't like changing his routine but can do it if you warn him in advance, he has moments of rage when things don't go the way he wants but this is very rare now. I would be interested in What you think?
 
If he is able to maintain a routine, and keep on top of his work, he should be well equipped to take on the work load. Perhaps the only thing to consider is whether he will be able to share a room with someone else long term. He may find there are days when he'll want to be alone for long periods of time, so if someone else is sharing a room, and he has no other place to hang out, it may cause him to feel a little edgy; especially if he doesn't get along with his room mate.

Perhaps it would be good to explore this, and if possible, even test his ability to live with a limited amount of privacy (if he's willing to give it a try). It could help provide him with a realistic view of his living conditions, as some Aspies often underestimate how much they rely on their privacy, until it's lost. It could potentially prevent a rage attack, if he does in fact prefer his privacy. Remind him too that his roommate could be anyone, and may not necessarily understand his need to follow routine, or order.
 
Hi again I'm in Queensland. I remembered that at Uni I did 3 subjects a semester instead of 4 and that helped me. In semester 3 (Summer break) I would pick up the other 2 subjects. This made it less stressful for me. As for living arrangements I preferred living by myself. When I did have a room mate I found that I was constantly frustrated to the point of being angry. She would bring ransoms over, have parties at our place and I never had my peace and quiet time.
Uni is a different transition, but done well can be very successful.
 
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