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Diagnosed at the age of Jesus Christ

Cloudracer

Cloudracer

Member
Just got officially diagnosed at 33 years old.

HF Autism, since Asperger's is no longer recognised (out of respect, right?).

I'm a bit confused, I admit. Therefor I now take an example to Newt Scamander and Wentworth Miller...

Bit of an existential crises by consequence, and trying to find people to talk with, to understand this new reality a bit better.

A sudden explanation for lifelong war against confusion, is overwhelming to be eclipsed by sudden sunlight.

And I want to be a better, more patient person.

Intolerance for impatience, frustration and pain makes me sometimes... less than what I used to expect of myself.

ENFP-T 4w3

Hey :cool:


PS - ADD inattentive
 
Starting over with new knowledge from being diagnosed, can feel like a small personal Easter of your own. Welcome to the forum.
 
Hey thanks! Yeah, good description. It's amazing and soothing. Just, I expected water out of the elephant's trunk, instead of bubbles. But that's not to say it isn't enjoyable - if not more so.
 
Self-diagnosed at 68. There's something to the saying that all the old have left is their memories. Now, every one of my old memories/perceptions has to be re-evaluated in light of the fact that my first impression was received in ignorance of some very important factors. I work seriously at not doing that, because it is nerve-wracking, never ends, and rarely resolves anything. But, facts are facts and my entire life experience, from birth to my wife's death, can't be relied upon. Four years later, reevaluations still occupy my mind. You are still young, and probably will be effected by that much less; I hope.
 
Hi and Welcome!
I am a later in life diagnosed also. Mid-fifties.
It helped me understand my life and self a lot, so I'm glad to have been diagnosed
and learn from there on.
 
Rodafina said:
Hello and welcome @Cloudracer.


What do you mean by this?



I like how you said this. Hopeful for you.
Click to expand...
Thanks

ENFP is a personality type from the MBTI. Stands for Extroversion, Intuition, Feeling, Perceiving.
4w3 is a type from the Enneagram. It's type number 4 with number 3 tendencies.

Not just hopeful, I think I can be helped into a functional future now. So yes...
 
Cloudracer said:
Thanks

ENFP is a personality type from the MBTI. Stands for Extroversion, Intuition, Feeling, Perceiving.
4w3 is a type from the Enneagram. It's type number 4 with number 3 tendencies.

Not just hopeful, I think I can be helped into a functional future now. So yes...
Click to expand...
None of these letters and numbers mean very much to me at all. I was hoping you could explain it in regular words. But no pressure, it’s okay if you don’t want to.
 
Hi!
First, good that you've got a diagnosis! It can be really helpful to understand yourself and maybe cut yourself some slack from time to time.

Im not going to pretent that I understand what getting a diagnosis at 33 means since I was younger (18), but I do get what it's like to live with yourself each day and questioning if you're just crazy or why you're just not like everyone else seemingly. A diagnosis answers this question, but also brings up so many more questions and it will continue to frustrate and confuse you at times, but you're not alone! There are people to reach out to and to get to know and to not feel alone with. Just know that you'll be okay in the end, yeah?


Also, you've hit a nerve of mine with mentioning Newt Scamander. I love the movies and his character is actually one of the reasons I finally realized what exactly was going on with me because of him I did a lot more research :D
 
Cloudracer said:
How'd you get to the dx?
Click to expand...
I was seeing a grief counselor weekly after the death of my mother.
It was something I couldn't seem to adjust to, and the counselor must have known quite a bit about Asperger's, as it was called then, because she ask questions that I didn't realize were related to autism.
Finally, the last straw was when we were sitting by a pool and every time I started to talk with her I looked at the pool.
She told me to look at her when I spoke. I did and she asked if that was hard.
I said yes, it was.

She told me I should see a psychologist that specializes in autism because she felt a lot of my problem with not adjusting seemed to be Asperger's associated.
Not just prolonged grief.

I found a psychologist that did ASD tests and therapy. My insurance covered the cost and that's how I got the diagnosis. It all fit.
 
soph21 said:
Hi!
First, good that you've got a diagnosis! It can be really helpful to understand yourself and maybe cut yourself some slack from time to time.

Im not going to pretent that I understand what getting a diagnosis at 33 means since I was younger (18), but I do get what it's like to live with yourself each day and questioning if you're just crazy or why you're just not like everyone else seemingly. A diagnosis answers this question, but also brings up so many more questions and it will continue to frustrate and confuse you at times, but you're not alone! There are people to reach out to and to get to know and to not feel alone with. Just know that you'll be okay in the end, yeah?


Also, you've hit a nerve of mine with mentioning Newt Scamander. I love the movies and his character is actually one of the reasons I finally realized what exactly was going on with me because of him I did a lot more research :D
Click to expand...
Let's talk more about New Scams... very likeable caracter
 
Rodafina said:
None of these letters and numbers mean very much to me at all. I was hoping you could explain it in regular words. But no pressure, it’s okay if you don’t want to.
Click to expand...
Hard but I'll try. I'm not very good at written communication.

The 'introverted' extrovert. Pretty in between. Extroverts tire or intimidate me, introverts I tend to almost guide (and overwhelm) and don't overwhelm me.

We are the walking paradox - always on the road for justice and actively engaging generally, as we're emotionally active, and often lead with our values before anything else.

I monologue, unfortunately a lot, before realising I'm doing it and consequently apologizing. Because the presence of people allows my brain to quadriple the speed and efficiency and come up with connections and solutions. It allows my subconscious to digest and process previously untreated information.

This makes us analytical and speculative, connectiont the real with the hypothesis. and intuiting the next probability - all in the subconscious, but into the conscious as we are particularly receptive of said information.

We are argumentative, because we place each subject in multiple scenarios, aiming for the tangible ones, and I personally live in a world without rules - except for the ones I make up for myself. And they become rituals.

We're called the compaigners. My friends call me either the philosopher or the artist. Good lawyers/teachers.
 
SusanLR said:
I was seeing a grief counselor weekly after the death of my mother.
It was something I couldn't seem to adjust to, and the counselor must have known quite a bit about Asperger's, as it was called then, because she ask questions that I didn't realize were related to autism.
Finally, the last straw was when we were sitting by a pool and every time I started to talk with her I looked at the pool.
She told me to look at her when I spoke. I did and she asked if that was hard.
I said yes, it was.

She told me I should see a psychologist that specializes in autism because she felt a lot of my problem with not adjusting seemed to be Asperger's associated.
Not just prolonged grief.

I found a psychologist that did ASD tests and therapy. My insurance covered the cost and that's how I got the diagnosis. It all fit.
Click to expand...
That looking thing... I know... eyes are SO distracting. Can never think when looking someone in the eyes, or I start simply observing every detail and I objectify them. But then I become afraid the person might notice.

In Wolf of Strallweet they explain (in very demeaning explicitive ways in regards to a group of people with a disability they treat as less) how to pretend to remain Icontact without actually doing so.

It's looking at the nose.

Personally I always start observing facial features, details etc.
 
Cloudracer said:
Hard but I'll try. I'm not very good at written communication.

The 'introverted' extrovert. Pretty in between. Extroverts tire or intimidate me, introverts I tend to almost guide (and overwhelm) and don't overwhelm me.

We are the walking paradox - always on the road for justice and actively engaging generally, as we're emotionally active, and often lead with our values before anything else.

I monologue, unfortunately a lot, before realising I'm doing it and consequently apologizing. Because the presence of people allows my brain to quadriple the speed and efficiency and come up with connections and solutions. It allows my subconscious to digest and process previously untreated information.

This makes us analytical and speculative, connectiont the real with the hypothesis. and intuiting the next probability - all in the subconscious, but into the conscious as we are particularly receptive of said information.

We are argumentative, because we place each subject in multiple scenarios, aiming for the tangible ones, and I personally live in a world without rules - except for the ones I make up for myself. And they become rituals.

We're called the compaigners. My friends call me either the philosopher or the artist. Good lawyers/teachers.
Click to expand...
Okay, that makes sense to me. Thank you for taking the time to explain.
 
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