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Recent content by twilightzone76

  1. twilightzone76

    I think i need to just dive in.....

    Mine too. I always knew something was slightly different from the beginning but his aspiness doesn't jump out at you initially. Handsome, charming, good job, responsible. Now that we've been together for a few years he "lets it show" a lot more whereas in the beginning I think he did his best to...
  2. twilightzone76

    I think i need to just dive in.....

    I'm also in a relationship with an Aspie - he's very shy around people he doesn't know and has told me he doesn't want to meet certain friends of mine because they seem this way or that way when he hasn't even met them. I had both my best friend and my Dad just show up at my house on separate...
  3. twilightzone76

    New user and newly diagnosed i have questions

    Fascinating video. Great speaker too.
  4. twilightzone76

    deleted

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  5. twilightzone76

    I said one thing, he understood another thing. Me NT he AS. I need some light here...

    I think Suzanne is just telling it like it is. Sometimes the truth hurts and people would rather stay in denial. It just kills me to see people alter who they are to try appease someone or make excuses for unhealthy behavior. You're just prolonging the inevitable by doing this. Just because...
  6. twilightzone76

    Are many neurotypicals too needy or emotional to be in relationships with Aspies & Auties?

    I think most of the dysfunction in these relationships stems from the differences in expectations of what love is and looks like. You start forming these expectations at a young age based on what you've been taught, observed and experienced. Naturally, it feels as though pieces of a puzzle are...
  7. twilightzone76

    Saddened by a website I was reading

    Sounds like your cousin is in denial and not accepting of the fact that Autism is neurological. I was there at one point too - thinking it was just behavior that can be modified. It was when I started looking at the scientific research that has been conducted comparing the structural differences...
  8. twilightzone76

    Saddened by a website I was reading

    I hear what you're saying Judge...the outcome may very well be the same whether it's disclosed up front or not. The difficulties will still be there, although it would prevent a lot of confusion as to why things are difficult and also so the NT can come to grips with the fact that the behavior...
  9. twilightzone76

    Saddened by a website I was reading

    Well consider yourself lucky if that's not the case with you. Maybe others can chime in with their thoughts...
  10. twilightzone76

    Saddened by a website I was reading

    The difficult part is that the Aspie a lot of times doesn't realize they are doing something hurtful and can't understand the feelings of their partner. On top of that, when the NT partner expresses their hurt, the Aspie doesn't know how to "fix" it. I have not experienced this disconnect in any...
  11. twilightzone76

    Saddened by a website I was reading

  12. twilightzone76

    Saddened by a website I was reading

    I think the general consensus among both NT's and Aspies is that these relationships are pretty darn difficult. How could they not be when neither can fully understand how the other thinks? I think Mary Terry has a very legitimate point about disclosing. How can a relationship be healthy if one...
  13. twilightzone76

    Emotions in Movies

    I love that you can differentiate between empathy and sympathy. Many think they can empathize but it's usually sympathy they're referring to. Understandable when you need to be able to experience the emotion in order to understand fully what it is. It's sort of like a pre-teen who swears up and...
  14. twilightzone76

    Why All The Love?

    "But even that might be different today, as I have learnt a few things over the years. I'd likely be a better boyfriend today. I'm not a stagnant, unchanging stereotype as some in the past have assumed." This is wonderful! Many (both NT's and Aspies) are not driven to evolve as humans. To be...
  15. twilightzone76

    Why All The Love?

    And that's exactly why I am here - I have been in a LTR with an Aspie and have done my fair share of research but who better to get insight from than the horses mouth. You will hear some that flat out say they cannot empathize despite giving it full effort and others that find empathy as being...
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