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Recent content by Alpha23

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    The only instances I feel anything

    I might be extremely different to anyone else here then. I know Autism is rather based on distinction.
  2. A

    The only instances I feel anything

    If it was possible here in Germany I'd do that as well, but as pretty much everything is forbidden here, I've arranged with just keeping social contact to a minimum and only leave my apartment every couple of days to go shopping.
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    The only instances I feel anything

    Never happened in my past relations - every time I didn't see my partner, I was relieved and felt more in touch with myself. Now I've realized I'm entirely unable to love basically anything. So very very different.
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    The only instances I feel anything

    Just got hit with affection again, which happens extremely seldomly. There is only a very specific instance when I get hit with something that can be described as maybe longing or devastation, but it's... hard to describe, because it boils down to a mere concept of things. This time it was...
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    Diagnosed at 39 years of age

    Just as an addendum - I don't mind interacting socially with somebody like giving directions and I also have an opposite sex acquaintance, but neither do I wish I wasn't isolated, nor would I care if that acquaintance just ceased to exist. I'm simply entirely neutral towards everything and...
  6. A

    Diagnosed at 39 years of age

    While that's surely well-meant, given that I'm neither able to enjoy anything at all, relate to others or be interested in anyone, this probably won't happen. ;)
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    Diagnosed at 39 years of age

    Sure, that one is new to me, but I don't really think it's that. When I think back to a time where others at least thought I had emotions, I can't see how that could even have been me. I was just mirroring what I saw, nothing more. Every display of emotion was basically a logical conclusion -...
  8. A

    Diagnosed at 39 years of age

    Yeah, I've heard that conclusion a lot - I've been in three clinics and had therapies for years, but nobody was able to pin-point what's actually different with me. Only complete isolation opened up my mind to experience how I really am after about a month. I don't think it's being "numb", I...
  9. A

    Diagnosed at 39 years of age

    As I was already in a home office job then, I was able to basically just "let my brain free" so to speak. Been masking for 35 years already (I'm subtracting the early stages of development here). I soon noticed that feelings like empathy also belonged to that masking after a while. It's...
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    Diagnosed at 39 years of age

    I don't think it's possible to compare our systems. I went to a special autism diagnostics psychologist. Three sittings and I had the diagnosis in my hands. Not a single person suspected it for 35 years and I had to come up with the possibility myself (masking is a hell of a mechanism).
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    Diagnosed at 39 years of age

    Hi everybody I'm Timo from Germany and I've been diagnosed with Aspergers in February 2023, when I was 39 years old. Since then, almost everything has changed and keeps changing, like almost entire lack of feelings and (luckily I have to say) almost no social contacts anymore. Not sure why I...
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