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Asperger's & Autism Forum

kriss72
kriss72
Do you mean like a group of other autistic, or just a group that accepts you for who you are? - I have recently started in a group with other autistic people, it has been a really nice experience, like no need to mask, and half of us sit with fidget toys in the meetings, it's not like friendships as we barely know each other yet, but it's still nice :)
AuroraBorealis
AuroraBorealis
To be honest, I don't really mind. My friends consist of mostly in some way neurospicy people, and yet I don't really feel at home. Also, the people I feel fairly connected with almost all don't live where I live, so it's mostly just irregular WhatsApp messages, and I miss just hanging out with people I really feel comfortable with.
kriss72
kriss72
I don't know if there are any autistic groups near you, we have some open groups here that I think meet every month, if you have something simelar it could be a way to meet others, which could lead to friendships in the future...
AuroraBorealis
AuroraBorealis
Yeah, I could try that. The thing is, I often feel on the outside both with NT as well as with autistic people. Since my social skills seem to be uncharacteristically good and, instead, I struggle more with other aspects (sensory overload, social exhaustion, anxiety, executive functioning), I often feel "not autistic enough" for fellow autists, but definitely "not NT enough" to be relaxed around NT people.
kriss72
kriss72
I can understand why that makes it more difficult... so like some group for probably late diagnosed... I don't know if that exists, but I'm sure there must be many people like you that kind of have a foot in each camp :)
M
marc_101
Yep, same here. I'm not the typical NT, not the typical ADHD, and not the typical ASD... But it's also an illusion because you can re-frame the issue and focus on the similarities instead of the differences. Maybe you don't need an entire group of people, perhaps just a good friend that understands the entire you? Or a person that shares your obsessions?
AuroraBorealis
AuroraBorealis
@kriss72 I looked and, actually, there doesn't really seem to be such a group around here, which really surprises me, since I live in a very large city. But I'll keep looking.
AuroraBorealis
AuroraBorealis
@marc_101 I'm sorry, although it's nice to hear that there are others with similar issues. I often feel like a fraud around autists. But then I have a meltdown because it's too loud, and I'm like, nope, I'm not faking.
AuroraBorealis
AuroraBorealis
@marc_101 I actually recently met a person who shares surprisingly many of my interests and I've been overjoyed. But that person doesn't seem to be interested (yet) in that much contact, they struggle with depression and OCD so contact is quite irregular and although I asked several times, we haven't managed to meet. I'm quite disappointed about that.
M
marc_101
Haha, exactly the same here, but for me it's a shutdown. I think that feeling is also a trait. My best theory is that we can mostly "pass" around other people and discovered ASD late, so in some circumstances we start having doubts about ASD. We need an event like a meltdown or shutdown (or a bad interaction) to remind us that the issues are real. I bet there are many like us on this forum...
M
marc_101
Is there an astronomy group? I think you like space, right? Maybe a group like that could work
AuroraBorealis
AuroraBorealis
Maybe. I love it and get really excited about it, but I actually don't know that much about it. Maybe a Harry Potter group would be better. Although also there I often feel like a bit of an outsider because I don't get as excited about it as everyone else. I'm not really into cosplay, for instance, and I don't collect merch, and stuff like that. I just know a looot of trivia.
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