She did me dirty. She used me for sex and cut off someone who would’ve been loyal to her and would’ve continued to give her the sex and affection she craved.
She might make more money in her job than I do, but she does not have better character than I do.
With respect to the emotional pain you’re in, and acknowledging that you may have been led on unfairly and without just cause: this vent is going a little far, to the point of making a lot of cruel assumptions and judgements about this woman, who truthfully, you don’t really know from a can of paint and aren’t attached to except inside your head.
I’m saying this to help guide and give you a different perspective, out of tough love—there’s a few sides to every story, not just yours. Consider she could be going through something right now, or could have been before you met her. Perhaps your relationship triggered unpleasant and difficult-to-handle associations for her. Maybe she’s still learning about herself, what she wants and needs and can offer, and along the way she made a misjudgement about that in regards to you. Anything could be going on that you aren’t privy to.
Could this be a case of inflated and disappointed expectations on your end, as well? Or mismatch and miscommunication of desires? It’s up to each party to communicate what they really seek, and you’re right that she wasn’t clear enough, so you became confused and were let down. However, you too had a responsibility to express earlier on to her what you actually wanted, so she had a chance to decline and move on if it was too much or untimely for her—did you make it crystal clear off the bat? Because sleeping with someone or spending some time with them doesn’t make you undying forever soulmates with them, doesn’t mean you’re bonded and legally bound, doesn’t mean they owe you anything or vice versa. Women have learned that men usually love to invoke and exploit this boundary, actually—perhaps she assumed *you* were only looking to surf and turf?
What’s more, ‘loyalty’ is relative and subject to context. Many a ‘loyal’ lover, guardian, guard, soldier, cop, patron, courtier or samurai has done horrible, inhumane and evil things in the name of devotion, standing by their man, keeping their word etc. Loyalty is not is some kind of holy virtue that makes others indebted to you no matter the circumstances. It’s important to be faithful to someone for the right reasons in the right ways, not simply blindly or slavishly committing to them.
Can recommend you to buy or adopt a puppy of a sociable breed, with no-one else in the world to love her, then spoil her rotten if that’s the kind of relationship you crave. My Labrador is so physically needy and affectionate with people, and he’d probably follow me over a cliff (granted, he’s pretty stupid as well as lovely, but). Because I have him in my life, I don’t often feel lonely or totally unloved, and I felt the same with my previous dog. Adult humans with our big complicated brains and adaptational instincts and thirst for the novel or the better in life aren’t usually capable of this sort of love.
