We're grown-ups, shouldn't we be discussing a new movie or the conflict in North Korea? Are we Aspies more mature?
Here's an important question: Why worry so much about looking "mature"? And what IS maturity, really?
I've seen so many people struggle with this one, and I DONT mean just Aspies. I've watched people set aside and ignore things that they very, very clearly love just to appear "mature" to others, watched them be generally miserable in social situations (and have had to hear about how awful it was afterwards) and honestly... I facepalm every single time.
Maturity isnt about simply following others blindly, or constantly wondering about how perfect you look in front of others. To me, maturity is being adult enough to make your OWN decisions, do your OWN things. Me? I play video games. I go to anime conventions, and yes, I get into costume. I will make assorted squeaking noises at dogs/cats that I'm with, which seems to entertain everyone (particularly the dog/cat, which is the point). And the way I see it, if someone else has a problem with any of this... it's THEIR problem, not mine. I'm a grown adult: I'll bloody well do as I like, thanks. Anyone that would genuinely judge me badly for any of this? They sure as bloody heck aint my friends anyway, are they? So they can just shove off. Heck, even within the gaming hobby, I dont just stick to "mature" games... I play whatever I darned well please.
This holds true for conversation, too. I could rant for hours about gaming, or whatever stupid thing my computer did last night, or talk about anime. But if someone starts going on about politics (UGH), or North Korea, or whatever? I become nearly silent, or simply wander off, because I have no interest and I'm not about to pretend otherwise. In some specific cases, too much of this will get me to snap a bit, if anyone is trying to force me into those sorts of topics (as such, nobody tries anymore). If they dont like it, well... tough. They should be seeking out other like-minded individuals, instead of someone who would be just PRETENDING at it.
Which I think is another very important part of this. With me being the way I am, I've tended to not just gravitate towards, but also attract, people that are also into the sorts of things I am. Other adults that may be total geeks, or whatever. And this has led to lasting friendships where nobody is bothering to pretend at anything. My friends can be pretty darned silly at times, and frankly, I think it's great that they find themselves comfortable enough to be like that. Of course, in some situations when others are around, they'll go through the whole miserable "pretending to be like these other guys" bit (and you can just read the unpleasantness of it in their faces and voices the whole time, and again I sometimes get to hear about it after the fact) and as always, it hurts to watch. It just furthers the idea that being yourself, instead of being what others think you should be, is important. Whatever that may involve.
Now on a side note here.... what the heck is an "icebreaker game"? Outside of some of the more caffeinated anime conventions, I cant say I've seen groups of people acting like frogs very often.
I'm in my final year as an intern, getting my medical license this fall.
