What was your wedding like?

[Wireless]

How did you cope with all the planning and the big day itself? Did you enjoy it?

 

[Harrison]

I'll let you know as I get married in two weeks

So far so good, everything has been planned with military precision, but then we're both aspies and Slithytoves could plan Creation itself and not break a sweat

 

[Wireless]

Congratulations!
I could tell from other posts that you and Slithytoves knew one another, but I hadn't realized that you were engaged.

Edit: Also explains why your profile pics match.

 

[Datura]

I could tell from other posts that you and Slithytoves knew one another, but I hadn't realized that you were engaged.

I thought that's what he was implying. I suppose it explains he similar avatars.
Congrats Harrison and Slithytoves!

As for marriage, I can't speak from experience. I might forgo formalities and simply have my family and friends take care of everything. I could have some people on cooking duty, others providing entertainment... ext. Rather than going into debt for one day I could enlist the wedding party and have that be their gift to us.

Then again, I also have a dream wedding of operatic proportions floating in the aether of my mind. It would be grand, but reality would never conform with my ideals, so why bother. It's not worth the stress.

 

[Nitro]

I stipulated that I would not tolerate a huge affair and we got married in a local park. The arrangements were very simple and we held the reception immediately afterwards. We placed notes in the invitations that stated that the dress was to be appropriate for a picnic,not a grand ballroom. Our families rallied around us and provided all the food preparation and serving. I had my friend,a local justice of the peace, perform the ceremony as I did not want to have anything to do with religion by that stage of my life.I recall waking that morning with the worst summer cold of my life. I was freakin miserable I used my streetmachine for the wedding car(gearheads always include their machinery in any event that is important to them and I still have the car ) I have pictures of me holding my infant nieces and nephews while seated in it.Those kids are all grown up now and have begun families of their own.

We made it ten years as a couple,but parted ways because we had differing ideas of what we wanted out of our worlds. I got to buy her a really nice house I have never seen as a parting gift

 

[Nitro]

I stipulated that I would not tolerate a huge affair and we got married in a local park. The arrangements were very simple and we held the reception immediately afterwards. We placed notes in the invitations that stated that the dress was to be appropriate for a picnic,not a grand ballroom. Our families rallied around us and provided all the food preparation and serving. I had my friend,a local justice of the peace, perform the ceremony as I did not want to have anything to do with religion by that stage of my life.I recall waking that morning with the worst summer cold of my life. I was freakin miserable I used my streetmachine for the wedding car(gearheads always include their machinery in any event that is important to them and I still have the car ) I have pictures of me holding my infant nieces and nephews while seated in it.Those kids are all grown up now and have begun families of their own.

We made it ten years as a couple,but parted ways because we had differing ideas of what we wanted out of our worlds. I got to buy her a really nice house I have never seen as a parting gift

Pit row Indianapolis Motor Speedway | AspiesCentral.com Here is a pic of my ex and my car about a year after we were married

 

[StephF]

It was a simple do, but the Coke and Tango flowed well and there was Kraftwerk playing in the background.
The wedding was attended by a host of peripherals, several hard drives and two printers.

I said "I do" and my wife said "Hello World !"

 

[Slithytoves]

Thanks for the congrats, Wireless and Datura! I have no idea who this Harrison guy is, though. He's been stalking me with this crazy delusion for months now. I tried turning him in to the mod team but he keeps intercepting all of the messages.

"Military precision" is easy when all I have to plan is picking my intended up at the airport and making sure our t-shirts and jeans don't clash for the ceremony. No reception planned, and only two witnesses even though my whole family lives in town and is very supportive. I'm still trying to convince my mom not to out-dress us.

So it sounds like StephF had a similar idea to ours. We're going for a new record in minimalism. After the road we've each traveled, the event is a minor consideration compared to the enormity of finding each other in the first place. I have nothing against big weddings for those who want them. It's just not my thing. I prefer to skip the stress and focus entirely on the joy. Besides, since I refuse to attend weddings of any size I wouldn't want to be a hypocrite.

(Love the Kraftwerk, StephF! I could totally dig "Trans-Europe Express" as a wedding march. It actually fits the timing of that weird old step-together-step walk. )

 

[Greg]

How did you cope with all the planning and the big day itself? Did you enjoy it?

My wedding was really nice and small. We actually got a package where everything was included and all we had to do was show up. It made things super simple on my wife to where it was limited in what she had to worry about. Plus it was our parents and kids who came so we didn't have a lot of people to worry about.

 

[AsheSkyler]

I kept it small and simple, just family and one or two friends, and I did most of the work myself. I made the bird seed packets, I made the bouquet I'd carry, the bouquet I'd throw, and the one my single bridesmaid would carry, I made the boutonnieres and corsages, designed my own wedding invitations and ordered them, I made/oversaw my dress, and I handled many of the decorations. Small things like food and the cake, I asked relatives if they would like to bring a small dish. Nothing huge, just if one person would bring chips, or another would bring a few pieces of fruit. I didn't plan to throw a banquet, just needed finger food. There was no formal photographer, we had one friend that loved to take pictures so we put her as the main photographer, and we encouraged everybody else who wanted to take pictures to feel free to do so and we'd be happy to see what they took if they wanted to share them. There was no music since it was an outdoors wedding, all we needed was the rustle of the wind through the leaves. We got married for about $1500, and that includes the total cost of the license, preacher's fee, rings, invitations, food, decorations, and everything involved. Considering I put it together for nearly a year, it was easy to spread out the cost.

Bitter, bitter memories though. I tried so very hard to let people feel included and thought of, because this was going to be the only time I'd ever get married, and I wanted to make sure I didn't have them griping at me later about how nobody loves them and they're always left out. I had two prima donnas to deal with, one got very verbally insulting and the other thought she could do whatever she wanted at my wedding without my approval despite her constantly going on about how it was my day. I wish now I'd just had a private ceremony with the preacher then gone on the honeymoon. I'm used to being insulted, but I'm very territorial and OCD and really didn't appreciate that one hag hijacking my wedding.

And on top of planning a wedding, I was going to school making straight A's and working hard as a waitress (the physical labor was less taxing on me than the socializing though). Those three together plus dealing with those two women and that was easily one of the most stressful situations I've ever been through. I had a constant pain in my body and I think the only reason I didn't come unglued on anybody was that physical exertion is my mood leveler and I got plenty of that at my job.

 

[Beverly]

How did I cope with all of the usual wedding planning, invitations and so forth? I didn't, I eliminated all of it. No reception, no wedding party, no groomsmen, bridesmaids, nothing of the sort.

My husband and I went to the county courthouse, got our marriage license is about 15 minutes, drove four block to the feed store that the Justice of the Peace owns, presented the license, asked one of the warehouse attendants to be a witness, walked into the warehouse part of the store, said our vows and, got a certificate.

Afterward, I dropped my husband off at his semi truck which was parked at the small truck stop in town, he left and began his trip to California, I went home alone, that was out honeymoon, going two different direction, doing our own individual things. it took a total of 1.5 hours to drive to own, get married, drop my husband off at his truck and, get back home.

I wore sweat pants and a sweat shirt, he wore jeans and a flannel shirt. We didn't even tell anyone we were getting married that day. We had been living together for two years before that and, the day before we had been discussing the long term legal and financial issues that getting married would solve. We decide to get married and, since the following day was the last day he would be home for six weeks, we got married before he left for California.

That suited me perfectly, no frills, no unnecessary fluff, no crowd, no screaming, no well wishers, none of that mess, just do what was needed and be done with it, no wasted time, money or energy.

My daughter nor his children knew we were getting married until we had already done it. We each called out children that evening and told them we were now married.

 

[Progster]

Ugh, it was a nightmare. I live in a rural area where people like to stick to traditions, and I felt under pressure to conform to their ways, even though I don't like ceremonies and large noisy gatherings. There were quite a few people there but not as many as there usually are at weddings, mainly my husband's friends and family who he had invited. I didn't like the ceremony and dancing, etc, and just wanted the whole thing to be over. I got got very upset when a couple of things didn't go to plan or were changed. I hated the dress I wore, I didn't wear any make up and didn't do up my hair. I couldn't: it just isn't me! This is unusual and afterwards people made a big deal of it. I accepted to have photos taken, but not a video. I can't dance, so I did one round then sat down. Also, the people who were helping me to organise it lied to me about the time so I arrived 40 minutes late.

ASD and wedding ceremonies simply don't mix. I would never want to go through that again.

 

[Aspieistj]

God sent a downpour and local flood and tried very hard to send me a message! I was so foolish I figured out my brother had to head west into the next town, get on Rt. 95 which is elevated, and exit as close as possible to the little church down on the beach of Long Island Sound. We arrived just before noon and the priest had already told my ex he would NOT perform an afternoon wedding. There were church laws back in 1969 about when marriages could be performed. Too bad the priest decided to hurry through the ceremony!