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joy of football feeling fake because of irrational thoughts?

C

cfc

Well-Known Member
I'm 17 years old, and I have been diagnosed with Aspergers and OCD. My "special interest" if you like, is football and Chelsea FC. I have been looking forward to the Premier League fixture release for the past few days, but in the last few years, I have suffered with irrational thoughts regards football, then take away my enjoyment of the game. It used to be all Shirt numbers being 1-11, and all dugouts being a certain way (Home team on the left, away team on the right), but now the big issue is the order of fixtures.

For some reason, in my mind, Chelsea's first and last game of the season have to be at home, otherwise I can't enjoy it, and it makes football feel fake for some reason. I don't believe this is a footballing issue (because on a football level I don't care if we're at home first and last or not), I think there is something else going on.

Anyway, the fixtures were released today, and the thing I was dreading has come true: We are at Home on the Opening Day (to Burnley), but our final match is Away to Newcastle. This has instantly set my irrational thoughts spiralling. I don't know what this is or how it even started, but it's really got me down today. It feels like all of my excitement surrounding the Pre-Season and new season has completely gone away, because I've got this "fake" feeling that I can't explain. Sometimes it even makes me feel sick.

I know this is a very specific example, but has anyone gone through something somewhat similar to this, and does anyone have any advice as to how to help me get over this?
 
It seems like you are telling yourself there is a perfect way for the games to be
and it would be terrible and catastrophic for them not to be that perfect way.

They won't be real unless they are exactly the way you suppose they ought to be.

I think you are right about this not being a footballing issue.
The thoughts are definitely on the non-rational side.

Do you see a therapist or counselor?
Of what anti-anxiety techniques are you aware?

You can see that it's not really the event itself that is the
problem, but what you are telling yourself about it.
 
To me bruv, football is my religion, im a gooner by the way, however the fixtures appear please enjoy them. ..!
Football....., englands gift to the world.!
 
Danny 74 said:
To me bruv, football is my religion, im a gooner by the way, however the fixtures appear please enjoy them. ..!
Football....., englands gift to the world.!
Click to expand...

China's gift to the world.

"A Chinese game called Cuju, Tsu' Chu, or Zuqiu has been recognised by FIFA as the first version of the game with regular rules."

From Wiki.
 
Bollacks, theres been a form of the game in england for a very long time that wasnt always referred to as football,
 
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