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If you could remove one fragment of Asd what would it be?

Chris Russell said:
You're Batman... you don't need social skills!
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I don't think Batman is autistic. He has a strong sense of empathy. He can always guess what the enemy is up to (with the possible exception of Lex Luthor and the Joker) and he knows exactly what to say to intimidate other criminals.

Batman seems incapable of establishing any intimacy in his relationships. Whether it be his children or his romantic interests. With the possible exception of Superman, he isn't friendly with anyone on the Justice League either.

Personally, I wish I could remove the trait were I am obsessed with accuracy and details ;-)
 
Granted: I can see moderating when things are giving me trouble. This last week I was overwhelmed sensory-wise; if iit kept up I'd like to see that turned down a notch. Like if I were not lucky enough to not need to be dressed formally all the time, that would drive me flippy.

Essentially, though, I would far rather see society moderated than myself.
 
The one thing that I would change would be my almost complete inability to "read" en-tees. I so often am accused of being "rude", which is just ludicrous, because I AM NOT RUDE! Is it my fault that I simply cannot pick up on their silly, non-verbal signals?
 
The fact I can't get a job because I'm Aspie and have other disabilities.

I have a meeting with a DEA at the Job Centre next week to try and change that but I don't hold much hope, my age goes against me as well even though I've been doing voluntary work since I was 14.
 
Executive functioning issues and inability to carry out plans and ideas. If I could get rid of those I could really 'go places' with my photography and art.
 
My lack of motivation for key tasks. I'm very much motivated only by things that I find interesting. If something isn't interesting then it's at risk of being forgotten about. Which is dangerous to my development really. These are things like passing my driving test, a field of work to go into. Pretty important stuff and it's just incredibly hard for me to do them. I don't know why. I've yet to really meet someone else like that. It just feels incredibly lonely to be like this.
 
Southern Discomfort said:
My lack of motivation for key tasks. I'm very much motivated only by things that I find interesting. If something isn't interesting then it's at risk of being forgotten about. Which is dangerous to mI y development really. These are things like passing my driving test, a field of work to go into. Pretty important stuff and it's just incredibly hard for me to do them. I don't know why. I've yet to really meet someone else like that. It just feels incredibly lonely to be like this.
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I get that.

I've noticed that it's dependant upon other factors to some extent.

I find a lot of negative factors are made worse by certain foods and toxin exposure. I can't eat much meat with out problems, maybe from ammonia? Swimming pool chlorine causes me problems too.

Even without that I still notice an inertia against doing certain tasks. I can sometime sneak up on myself though, by concentrating on the outcome of the thing I don't want t do. I can actually get a bit obsessed over the outcome, and that helps do the task.

It feels to me like my attention and the task I don't want to do are like poles of two magnets pushing each other apart.

With other tasks I'll try to get someone else to do them. I do tasks my wife hates and vice versa. If you have the money you can also use upwork.com contractors like getting a VA.
 
Full Steam said:
It feels to me like my attention and the task I don't want to do are like poles of two magnets pushing each other apart.
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Very much so, yes. It makes me feel like I'm just lazy. No professional has ever really told me if what I experience in that regard is an autistic feature or not. I just feel like what some people say about me is true. That I am just lazy. Or even worse I'm trying to use a symptom of autism to cover up the fact I'm lazy. It's hard. It's just hard.

Full Steam said:
If you have the money you can also use upwork.com contractors like getting a VA.
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Nice idea but I'm not always going to have the money to afford to do that sort of thing. Besides it would feel like I'm a failure at carrying out things that makes someone an adult.
 
Southern Discomfort said:
Very much so, yes. It makes me feel like I'm just lazy. No professional has ever really told me if what I experience in that regard is an autistic feature or not. I just feel like what some people say about me is true. That I am just lazy. Or even worse I'm trying to use a symptom of autism to cover up the fact I'm lazy. It's hard. It's just hard.
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I always felt like that too. I now know beyond doubt that I'm anything but lazy as I've proven it with hard work, yet that problem remains.



Southern Discomfort said:
Nice idea but I'm not always going to have the money to afford to do that sort of thing. Besides it would feel like I'm a failure at carrying out things that makes someone an adult.
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I now see myself as gifted in many ways, but with any unusual gift comes a price, and that's ok.

I do find that the part of my mind that holds back is not very smart, and I can trick it.

For example, I'd spend time looking at cars, and reading success stories about other people who had passed their driving tests. I'd read about the mechanics of driving, and how to excel.

All that would tend to release the inertia, and maybe even flip it into a special interest.

I used to ride motorcycles, and a special interest became peak performance road riding. I'd practice breaking to the limits of adhesion on every ride.

If it seems mundane, maybe it could be turned special with the right triggers?

Somethings can't, and I'll never be good at mundane admin work.
 
The Pain from being Hyper-sensitive! My co-morbid challenges: Vision problems (I've had three surgeries to correct double vision, and it's still a problem at times!) I sleep with my eyes open, which makes sleep difficult and causes severely dry eyes. My tongue is too short, so talking and being understood is frustrating! I'm a klutz and it's getting worse as I'm getting older! (45) I thought I was going to crash through the window when I was changing my sheets on the bed! I caught my foot in the flat sheet.
I'm also on Disability and it really bothers me because I'm a Conservative!
 
toothless said:
id hate to change anything about myself,i am used to being me and i would detest any change i dont care that i leave myself with some quite significant communication,sensory,interaction,behavioral and social impairments,i wouldnt be me without them,i really hate any kind of change.
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Thank you for being able to say that. I have spent all my life on the constant struggle to fit into some kind of person I was assured of that being the most healthy work. I am able to adapt and create new ways as unexpected changes occur yet, is very much a process.

I am so sick physically and mentally trying to figure out what and why I'm not ever finding personal intimate relationship attempts last or years not knowing I communicate with pictures and stories excessively long before the point, scared to be misunderstood and, I am very very much excellent at the work i had been in, I am just now able to understand that I am done with the pretend changes that please others but, fry my nerves. It was a long process to understand. I never knew what any of this diagnosis was of course at this age group.
 
Liam Sifr said:
I wouldn't change me. NT's pride themselves in being weird/different. Why should I change myself?
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I am so new to much of the experience of being diagnosed and being never endlessly searching for constant feeling out of sync with every person and every day.
I proactively tried drs and etc since 15 and am mid forties. I am not even sure who is nt or whatever, I think that I was just empty or void feeling in personal attempts to create a relationship, and ended up with a few friends who have been same, undiagnosed and felt the similar way of being able to speak with mimicking the social skills and sincere by nature so, my long story longer in replying was; I'll never go back into the pretending to be the expectations of my particular generation, family, peers and finally, relationships. Neurotypical or just plain cruel behavior that is just humans, I am just now recovering from the most vicious bullying of my entire life and finally being able to understand the out of sync pain inside. I was never courageous enough to become a member who spoke. I kept telling myself that the way I had seen the outpouring of the pain of being different seemed so unreal, then, i lived it and never saw it coming, or understood, and even now,made no sense to me.

I shared this because I am just never ending to be naive and honest and trusting everyone all the time. I like that quality, but I have now learned that I have had to create boundaries, say no, and stop the people please do to the guilt I have chosen to allow.

I am very compassionate in my own working and personal hobbies and,
I no longer doubt my own gut instincts and that is what I DID NOT DO.
WHILE I AM WRITING A BOOK HERE, I will answer the topic question. If I could remove one thing, it'd be the wasted time I spent working through my victim and shame obsession with trying to explain why I am just as equal, to THE FEW who just disappeared literally after I just got great help. I think they rather I had just never known, and remained the same. Isolated. I thought I if I could explain it, it'd matter and some loved ones DO NOT WANT TO KNOW.
I am a behavior specialist, just animals-black and white; and observation of why made me obsess about every possible thing that causes the most logical behavior of Being left by closest to me? I am good now.
I learned much.
But, now I am as is, and it's not an over night process of course, so, I didn't mean avoiding the stage of the victim, written above.
That is a natural part of grief.
I just obsessed negative or ruminating about the why, ironically, that's my life work.

I spent six months at home isolated. The grace of asking to receive help, from premade meals from my mum, two part time day younger women help me with everything, and I really appreciate the humility.

I am learning to summarize, bear with me please.
 
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