I hate grocery stores.

[OkRad]

Can't stand grocery stores--too crowded, and add to that the fact that I can't drive (due to never having learned how, plus 20/70 vision without my glasses), it makes it even more difficult for me to go during down time (early in the morning or late at night.) I nearly had a panic attack in Walmart a few weeks ago that was so bad that it took a manager to calm me down and find a quiet place in the store (vision center) to cash me out. Haven't been back since.

Wow, you were lucky. Ususally it is **** off and die. Compassion at wal mart? You must have some kind of sunshine following you around.

 

[justin_havu]

I wish I could say I was lucky, but at the time that's definitely not what I was thinking about. I never want to go through having an anxiety attack like that again, so I've added Walmart to the list of places I avoid at all cost. Other places would include: Gym, shopping malls, restaurants, movie theaters, pretty much any place that would involve having to be around strangers in general, even if it's just a couple.

 

[umbrellabeach]

I'd use the self-scan registers if those stupid employees would just not stand there staring at me. I'm anxious enough as it is, all they're going to do is make it worse.

That's the worst. I also hate when I'm at a restaurant looking at the menu, and the cashier at the desk stares at me while I do so. It makes me panic and much more likely to end up ordering something I don't really like, because I feel I'm under so much pressure to make a decision quickly and I don't have time to think it through. And the same thing goes when I'm at any store with my family. They always rush me, especially my mom, and my mind is muddled the whole time I'm there.

I use self-scan all the time when I buy things after work, but it's usually busy enough that the employee's attention isn't on me unless I ask for help. At least I'm able to do the actual shopping alone so I'm able to think and I know I'm getting the right items (the fact that I buy the same toiletries over and over helps too lol).

 

[LittleLemon]

That's the worst. I also hate when I'm at a restaurant looking at the menu, and the cashier at the desk stares at me while I do so. It makes me panic and much more likely to end up ordering something I don't really like, because I feel I'm under so much pressure to make a decision quickly and I don't have time to think it through. And the same thing goes when I'm at any store with my family. They always rush me, especially my mom, and my mind is muddled the whole time I'm there.

Oh my goodness, yes to the cashier thing. I purposely try to stay away from the counter at fast food place or a coffee shop, but they never get the hint and ask what you want as I'm furiously trying to take it all in. When I tell them I'm not sure yet, I get the feeling they're annoyed. There's this coffee shop I go to maybe once a year and their menu is so long with cutesy names for the coffees. Like, it's not just a simple 'mocha', but something like The Cozy Something-or-other. I don't get enough time to read the menu before they ask what I want and stare at me so I always end up stumbling over my words and asking for a recommendation. It's so awkward.

 

[Judge]

Oh my. I go through that scenario all the time. Where I'm expected to have to made up my mind on what I want to order if I get within a certain proximity of someone behind a counter. (Sometimes I swear I could have heard someone click a stopwatch!)

Even if in my case I cannot always read the menu until I get within a certain range of it!

Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh!

Lucky for me I order the exact same things where I even have exact change in my hand. That they love. Go figure.

 

[Nitro]

Lucky for me I order the exact same things where I even have exact change in my hand. That they love. Go figure.

OCD moment?

 

[Judge]

OCD moment?

Good question. Sometimes I'm not sure where my OCD begins and my autism ends. No joke.

But sometimes it is nice not to order the same thing to eat!

 

[Nitro]

Good question. Sometimes I'm not sure where my OCD begins and my autism ends. No joke.

But sometimes it is nice not to order the same thing to eat!

I had a discussion about routines,ASDs and OCDs earlier today

 

[Judge]

I had a discussion about routines,ASDs and OCDs earlier today

Most checkers in fast food don't last long here. But I do get a kick out of the ones who see me coming and already know what I'm going to order. Always to go.

 

[cherryq]

I don't do well in stores, especially if I'm by myself. If I'm by myself, I get my groceries as quickly as possible, pay, and leave. I try to avoid everyone if possible. When I get overwhelmed, I fight tears until I make it to my car and then am unsafe to drive home. It's an awful battle to go through. Usually I go shopping with my friend, though. She pushes the cart and makes sure I'm following my shopping list while she follows hers. If I get overwhelmed, she'll remind to get out my fidget blocks or have us stop and help me calm back down before continuing. She also takes the forefront in any encounters with others so that I don't have to navigate that as often.

 

[LittleLemon]

Cherryq, I feel the same way. I love when I go with my whole family despite how difficult my Aspie daughter can be. I let my husband lead and I just follow which is such a relief to me.

So today, another puzzling event. I was in Target at around 8am and they were stocking everywhere, so there were large crates all around. When you're leaving an aisle, I always stop and make sure no one is coming, but that involves pushing that thing halfway out so that little ole me can peer out and look left and right. Well today because of the crates, I had to move out further and stopped in time to not hit an older lady who was crossing a few feet from me. I smiled, said sorry, go ahead. She said sorry too and then she pointed at me and said, 'thank you' in a haughtier tone. WTF?!??!?! Why did she need to point so condescendingly? People confuse me. That wasn't like the Trader Joe's incident, but still. I really don't understand what other people do! Again, not upset, just amusingly confused.

 

[Judge]

Well today because of the crates, I had to move out further and stopped in time to not hit an older lady who was crossing a few feet from me. I smiled, said sorry, go ahead. She said sorry too and then she pointed at me and said, 'thank you' in a haughtier tone. WTF?!??!?! Why did she need to point so condescendingly? People confuse me. That wasn't like the Trader Joe's incident, but still. I really don't understand what other people do! Again, not upset, just amusingly confused.

Sometimes the true context of a social situation may not be obvious.

In other words the woman may be having a bad day and simply chose to "economically spend it" on a complete stranger. It happens.

 

[LittleLemon]

Sometimes the true context of a social situation may not be obvious.

In other words the woman may be having a bad day and simply chose to "economically spend it" on a complete stranger. It happens.

I'm starting to think I'm the normal one here :-D I wonder what would happen if I started pointing at people at stores and saying, 'yeah, that's right. Let me through!' I'd fit right in! I'm guessing this happens to everyone? Maybe when it happens to me, I feel guilty and internalize it more whereas people like my husband just brush it off.

I feel like I'm beating a dead horse here (I think that's the right figure of speech?), but just wanted to share another confusing scenario since you guys would understand. I just got a lovely image of beating a dead horse and it's not pleasant.

 

[Judge]

I'm starting to think I'm the normal one here :-D I wonder what would happen if I started pointing at people at stores and saying, 'yeah, that's right. Let me through!' I'd fit right in! I'm guessing this happens to everyone? Maybe when it happens to me, I feel guilty and internalize it more whereas people like my husband just brush it off.

I suspect most of us on the spectrum would and do agonize over just about any "social incidents" that happen to us. In real-time and even much later after the fact. That it's our nature to do so.

But sometimes unrelated parties can also provide alternative explanations after the fact. Otherwise in real-time I'd likely be as mortified as you were.

I guess the important thing is self control. Unless of course I perceive someone is about to commit an act of violence on my person. That's another matter. But yeah, unhappy social interactions even with complete strangers can linger in my mind as well. I can't just "brush it off", although I do try to avoid any real confrontation. You aren't alone.

 

[Mr Allen]

I hate self service machines, because if i buy age rated products such as Beers, Wine or even Xbox magazines, it flags the item and asks for an Assistant to verify my age! I suppose I should be flattered, but I'm nearly 41 for Christ sake! This is one of the many reasons I stopped buying Xbox mags years ago.

 

[Allicat]

I love grocery stores, especially the fruit section in the fall. Why? The smell of apples. My mom once told me a story of when I was around 2 1/2. I had an absolute meltdown, screaming and crying "Apple! Apple!" To her credit she finally figured out I wanted to go to Walbaum's (a grocery store in our neighborhood), and apparently once we got the to produce section I calmed down. I don't remember the meltdown, but to this day there's something about the smell of all the apples that I find really soothing.

 

[WildCat]

I used to dread grocery stores due to high anxiety at one point, but over the years I think my nerves have calmed significantly. Self checkout all the way!

 

[When In Rome]

Like Rich Allen above I cannot use self-service machines. To me it must be like being married; nothing but confusion and arguments. If I used one of those things it would be like... "unexpected meltdown in bagging area".

But I don't mind shopping and stores in general as long as there is plenty of space and they are not too crowded.

 

[Pixen]

I hate the grocery store. We get our groceries at Walmart... Even worse! It drives me bananas when I'm looking for what I might like to eat for the week with my grandma and there's way too many choices, too much noise, too many people, etc. To make matters worse, we go to the grocery store at least three times a week. And there's still never anything I want to eat at home that's healthy. It drives me nuts.

 

[Myway]

I hate shopping in general. Too much input for my brain at times.