How to Communicate My Point of View

[Azul-Infinito]

but he is unable to GET that he isn't RIGHT. His beliefs are just different.

Darlin... If you figure Out how to get him to do that, will you share the answer with 50% of America. Doesn't matter which 50.

Forgive my bluntness, but doesn't there seem to be some irony here, that you are just as sure that his believes are wrong as he is sure your beliefs are wrong. You just aren't a jerk about it. In the end isn't the best political choice the one that does the Most net good. What if conservatism actually props up the economy, and helps people. What if liberal ideology invest in people which does more net good over the long term. Not even the smartest man alive can say with absolute certainty what desicions will have the best outcome 10 years from now.

Your best bet is to try and see the value in his ideas, and then he may reciprocate seeing value in yours, but you have to be the bigger person and do it first.

Nobody in this world possesses absolute truth. Relative truth is all we know. .-Ghandi

Best

 

[MrSpock]

...it's so hard to deal with being in a relationship with someone who doesn't share your basic values.

I've not seen any evidence that this is the case, although you are in a better position to see that than I. Often different people will go about achieving the same goals in different ways, and making the world a better place is a very complex thing both to assess and achieve. It doesn't sound to me as though you've yet been able to communicate effectively enough on this topic to determine if what you suppose is indeed the case. Capitalism, communism, fascism, all have attempted to make the world a better place but in different ways and from different points of view.

 

[Rich Gray]

There are often multiple correct answers to a question.

Some Republican lawmakers place self reliance above all else. To them it is obscene for the government to feed poor children, or for the government to provide healthcare.

This focus on self reliance is more important to them than (a) a longer lived population, (b) saving money on healthcare, (c) reallocating this saved money (GDP) to other parts of the economy, and/or (d) insuring that we have children with properly nourished growing brains that will not suffer permanent damage from malnutrition. We could have A, B, C, and D by emulating how England, Canada, and/or Australia handle healthcare.

A, B, C, or D is a consideration placed below making sure that people are self reliant. Survival of the fittest is the goal, starving children be damned.

So being correct or not depends on what ones goals are.

This anti-socialist bit they have going on only applies towards pooling money to help people with biological needs. The vast majority of these Republican politicians who place self reliance over starving children do not raise a fuss about being forced to pay for a fire-engine, or an aircraft carrier. They can see how a fire-engine, or an aircraft carrier helps them, but cannot see how helping someone else with biological needs would be helpful. Perhaps they feel these people (a) are weak, (b) are poor due to God's will, and/or (c) are mooching off of hard workers (kids included).

 

[Judge]

Occasionally I find it ironic when those who contentiously argue over the merits of the political "left or right" may sometimes find they have more in common if they try to deduce their beliefs to whether they may support Social Contract Theory or Utilitarianism- in whole or in part.

Where they might just discover that they have more in common than they thought, using different philosophical "benchmarks". No guarantees, of course.

https://philosophy.tamucc.edu/sites/default/files/lecture_5_-_sc_and_util.pdf

 

[Azul-Infinito]

See- its this willingness to come together that we need right now!!! I am only 33, but this is by far the most bizarre and unnerving political climate I have ever seem in my lifetime. I cant believe that we as a people are really that divided when it comes down to it. It almost seems like fox and msnbc pits us against eachother. I flip back and forth between the two, and its like they are telling the news of two completely different countries.

Im just trying to be optimistic about the whole damn thing. Doing anything else just stresses the hell out of me.

 

[tree]

Please keep in mind that this site isn't the place to discuss the values of a political party or specific politicians unless it specifically involves discussions related to Autism. Political discussions that do occur related to Autism are subject to our rules about hateful comments, insults and personal attacks and will be moderated accordingly.

 

[Nitro]

 

[Nitro]

As much as we don't want to limit discussion here,the reports on this thread going astray are forcing us to take action and remove several posts. Political polarization will not be tolerated here.

 

[Azul-Infinito]

I really like it here at Aspie central. It's like therapeutic to talk to people that understand my struggles. But just so i am totally clear. No one is allowed to talk about politics in here?

There was nothing polarizing about what i said. Sorry, i tried to ask this question directly to Nitro, and I couldn't figure out how to do it.

 

[Rich Gray]

I will try. It is hard to not think about the startling political happenings, their underlying reasons, and their ramifications. It is quite hard to discuss sociology without politics and religion.

 

[Nitro]

I really like it here at Aspie central. It's like therapeutic to talk to people that understand my struggles. But just so i am totally clear. No one is allowed to talk about politics in here?

There was nothing polarizing about what i said. Sorry, i tried to ask this question directly to Nitro, and I couldn't figure out how to do it.

The political nature of this thread placed it on the staff's radar from the beginning. Looking back on it,we already knew it had the potential to polarize,but let it go until others complained.
In the interest of the entire membership,the posts that got the notices were the ones removed.

 

[Azul-Infinito]

Ok- I wont push the issue. I understand this is an autism forum after all, and will respect the peramiters set... i respect the logic behind the censorship i guess.

I feel kind of dirty being told what i can and cant say if it isn't hurting anyone? But im going to drop it right now. I wont bring it up again.
PS- I didnt mean for this to be a public discussion but couldn't figure out how to send private messages to the moderator-tried getting to your profile nitro, but there was only a discussion board. Sorry

 

[Nitro]

Ok- I wont push the issue. I understand this is an autism forum after all, and will respect the peramiters set... i respect the logic behind the censorship i guess.

I feel kind of dirty being told what i can and cant say if it isn't hurting anyone? But im going to drop it right now. I wont bring it up again.
PS- I didnt mean for this to be a public discussion but couldn't figure out how to send private messages to the moderator-tried getting to your profile nitro, but there was only a discussion board. Sorry

This was copied directly from the AC rules:

Regarding Politics And Debating Religion

While we are not going to out right ban the discussions of politics we are going to limit discussions of political nature to only those that surround Autism. This site isn't the place to discuss the values of a political party or specific politicians unless it specifically involves discussions related to Autism. Political discussions that do occur related to Autism are subject to our rules about hateful comments, insults and personal attacks and will be moderated accordingly.

Regarding religious debates, we are not allowing any threads to continue to that debate religion. If a thread regarding religion or spiritual beliefs turns into a debate it will be closed and actions may be taken against those involved.

This is a community for autism and we would like to keep the concentration on that. Letting known topics such as these spiral out of control takes away from everyone on the forum.

 

[Azul-Infinito]

Understood thanks

 

[Judge]

Looking back on it,we already knew it had the potential to polarize,but let it go until others complained.

Well stated.

To me that's the benchmark that is applied in determining whether a thread goes bad or not. That higher degree of polarization that can happen. Some subjects can be discussed in a nebulous fashion to effectively avoid it, while other times it may be inevitable.

Sometimes a tough, but inevitable call for the mods. Though always in the best interest of the community.

 

[WereBear]

Politics are personal because we can have a lot of defensiveness about our choices, since they reflect how the world works. To us.

I am a very strong feminist because i experienced firsthand how people dismissed me because i am a woman. Especially in a male dominated profession. But someone who never experienced this kind of prejudice might never see it unless it was brought to his attention in some way.

Theres a story going around about two workers who switched email signatures. He used her female name, and she used his male one, doing the same work. This was a resume writing service, all done online. It was the only change they made.

And she had the smoothest professional experience of her life. Her suggestions were immediately accepted, she was thanked and praised, there were few snags.

Her male co-worker was constantly criticized and argued with. He had to do more work for the same result! And he was constantly asked about his personal life.

Gave him a totally new perspective on feminism. Now, he had experienced the prejudice.

Perhaps your BF believes "no one can change anything" because that is what his experience has taught him. Or he needs to believe that to cope with his own stresses.

All we can do is offer our different experiences and help others realize different perspectives.

 

[granolaturtle]

um he seriously called you a sheep? break up with the jerk seriously

 

[sisselcakes]

I've not seen any evidence that this is the case, although you are in a better position to see that than I. Often different people will go about achieving the same goals in different ways, and making the world a better place is a very complex thing both to assess and achieve. It doesn't sound to me as though you've yet been able to communicate effectively enough on this topic to determine if what you suppose is indeed the case. Capitalism, communism, fascism, all have attempted to make the world a better place but in different ways and from different points of view.

You are absolutely right. As they say, "there is more than one way to skin a cat". Not really a nice image! LOL. I've been able to put things into perspective with regard to differences of opinion. I would be happy if he would stop harping on his believe that following politics is bad for my mental health. He cannot see that I do not respond to things or interpret things as he does. I told him that, at times, he's bad for my mental health. LOL. I'm sure I am for his at times too.

 

[sisselcakes]

um he seriously called you a sheep? break up with the jerk seriously

I'm having a really hard time with him in this sense. He gets so fixated on certain things, I feel harassed and interrogated by certain things he harps on. I realize the two can co-exist but at times (abusive bx and aspergery behavior). I wonder if this is emotional abuse or if it's his inability to understand me and is making an earnest attempt to understand.

For example, he has known me over 1.5 years and knows I'm on medication for depression, anxiety, and ADHD. He feels very strongly against the use of medication. I can't tell you how many times I've explained what life was like without it. He is fixated on alternative treatments. He says he's baffled why I won't try other remedies (e.g., exercise, diet, etc.) Well, when I don't feel normal mentally, I can't make myself do those healthy things. And who does he think he is? Why do I even feel responsible to explain myself.

 

[sisselcakes]

Politics are personal because we can have a lot of defensiveness about our choices, since they reflect how the world works. To us.

I am a very strong feminist because i experienced firsthand how people dismissed me because i am a woman. Especially in a male dominated profession. But someone who never experienced this kind of prejudice might never see it unless it was brought to his attention in some way.

Theres a story going around about two workers who switched email signatures. He used her female name, and she used his male one, doing the same work. This was a resume writing service, all done online. It was the only change they made.

And she had the smoothest professional experience of her life. Her suggestions were immediately accepted, she was thanked and praised, there were few snags.

Her male co-worker was constantly criticized and argued with. He had to do more work for the same result! And he was constantly asked about his personal life.

Gave him a totally new perspective on feminism. Now, he had experienced the prejudice.

Perhaps your BF believes "no one can change anything" because that is what his experience has taught him. Or he needs to believe that to cope with his own stresses.

All we can do is offer our different experiences and help others realize different perspectives.

Intriguing. Thanks for sharing this example. I'm a strong feminist too for obvious reasons, the things we have experienced through life!