Grandma here, concerned for grandson

[Streetwise]

So, I talked to my daughter about my feeling like my grandson is on the spectrum, and this is what she sent me in response :

Symptoms if ADHD in Infants and Young Children

Crying inconsolably
Screaming
Restlessness
Poor or little sleep
Difficult feeding
Refuses affection and cuddles
Head banging or rocking fits or temper tantrums

Symptoms in Older Children

Impulsiveness
Clumsiness
Constantly moving
Destructive or disruptive behavior
Accident proneness
Bouts of fatigue, weakness and listlessness
Aggressiveness
Poor concentration ability
Vocal repetition and loudness
Withdrawn behavior
Restlessness
School failure despite normal or high IQ
Poor sleep with nightmares
Poor appetite and erratic eating habits
Poor coordination
Irritable, uncooperative, disobedient, self-injurious, nervous, very moody or depressed
Hypersensitive to odors, lights, sound, heat and cold
Nose and skin picking or hair pulling
Bed wetting (enuresis)
Dark circles or puffiness below the eyes
Red earlobes or red cheeks
Swollen neck glands or fluid behind ear drums

*sigh* Some of these things do sound like him. Should I try insisting on neuro-psych testing?

for people who view disability as an abomination !
Your grandsons parents DONT need protection from society they need to protect your grandson from there selfcentred view of genetic differences in humans

 

[Bella Pines]

How heartwarming. My boys adore their grandparents and have such a special relationship with them.

So, my question is, is the school district right? Is he autistic?

I'll tell you what he is, he is your grandson. Why does it matter if he wears a sticker saying 'autistic child beware'? Autism is a spectrum, everyone is on it somewhere.

I would take each problem as it arises. For instance, if he gets excluded again, give him a hug, take him to see friends and tell him that you will always include him. If he struggles with an unavoidable change, think up some clever coping mechanisms to help him through the change.

His parents decision, official diagnosis or not, is theirs to make. All of us have parental challenges, as you did with your daughter. Some harder than others.

His brain, autistic or not, is his to own and come to terms with. All of us have problems and struggle to cope in certain situations. Some more than others.

It sounds like you are single handedly shouldering everyone's problems.

Your challenge, as you said, is to be there for him. And if that means reading up on autism and applying some coping tricks, or ADHD, or dyslexia, then do exactly that and tackle each problem as it arises.

I just want what is best for him and help him through some of these challenges.

And maybe through all the confusion, just wanting that is enough. All the best ! xxx

 

[Kelly Campbell]

Thanks for sharing it here. Very inspiring.

 

[TonnaRee]

Well, I know its been a few weeks since I posted, but I finally have gotten my daughter to agree to bring my grandson in for testing. This past weekend we had a distressing situation at a family gathering. My brother has 2 sons who are on either side of my grandson age wise. They tend to be a bit rough and sometimes mean, but my grandson doesn't understand mean-ness. He thinks they are just having fun. So, my youngest nephew climbed into the toybox and my grandson sat on it, and my nephew couldn't get out so he started crying, and my grandson did not recognize that he was scared so he kept sitting there. Well, it caused a great big fight in my family. And afterwards, I was able to tell my daughter that this is the kind of situation that he keeps having, and not recognizing that his friend was scared really is not a typical kind of thing. I reminded her that if he is on the spectrum it will only be to his benefit to get diagnosed so that we can start intervening asap. And the testing could say that he is not on the spectrum and then we can figure out what is going on to get him the help he needs. I am so relieved! She did not tell me yet when the testing will take place, only that she has made the appointment.