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Do You Feel Like An Alien?

HelloDizzy

HelloDizzy

Bed-Cookie
V.I.P Member
I tried to explain this feeling to my very normal boyfriend last night. He didn't get it.

Do you tend to feel like you are outside of the human species? As if you do not quite understand how they communicate, how they chitter-chatter and laugh constantly and have no hesitancy about going out and doing menial things?
It's kind of a feeling like everyone is in a bubble and you're on the outside of it, looking in at them, observing, not quite able to fit into humanity.

I've felt like this for as long as I can remember.
It's rather isolating.

Is this an Aspergers/Autistic type of thing? Does anyone know what I'm talking about?
 
I think it kinda comes with ASD

It's the lack of ability to connect for most, and it only gets worse if you're thinking about the "why's" and "hows" in regards to human behaviour. A lot of stuff doesn't make sense to me, but people tell me it's usually a bit of a "emotional" thing. People indulding in smalltalk, laughing for (what to me seems) no good reason. It's something I can't force on myself.

I don't know if I could claim I don't fit in with "humans"... but I have a really weird feeling when I am forced to mix in. It feels like it's an undercover mission and I kinda failed that exam (and thus am bad at it). In a way I can get along fine by just being "me"... though people in general told me "you're weird". So that's a reason I don't indulge in social interaction for most and just keep by myself. I don't feel any guilt for being me, but I do feel presured into going out of my own way if I want to be social, when I don't have an intrinsic motivation for. I always feel like showing "normal" behaviour is like a job to me, much like someone who can't walk instinctively but has to think and act consciously for each step. And that's really to tiring for me, and I don't even see a benefit for it. People might call it lazy, but I believe that any effort should somehow pay itself off (in any way, wouldn't go as far as material stuff).

As a kid people already tried to talk guilt into me by saying "don't act this weird"... no, it's not weird, it's me, I really feel sorry if it's weird in your frame of reference.

Coinciding with me thinking about behaviour I'm also quite interested in philosophy, which doesn't really contribute in just going with the flow but makes up for much more critical thinking and the reasons of behaviour. Speaking of philosophy, I hear a lot of people argue that my ideas in general aren't ethical, they're sensible... but in general there's a lot of "oh my, you can't do that... you just can't, it doesn't feel right". And I end up in arguments why that is, it apparently is a trait that comes with empathy to say something is "wrong"...

I actually think that I'm in a bubble, not the rest. But the other way around makes sense. No matter how hard I try... it's a f'n effort to talk to people (not by means of social anxiety)... but sometimes it seems as if I'm speaking a different/foreign language. And that in general gets odd if the people you can't connect with (less and less each day) are people like my parents... I wouldn't be surprised if I was adopted either way (and I've heard people tell me that in the past; I resemble my dad by looks a bit, but for a big part I'm nothing like them in behaviour, values, thoughts and stuff like that, never have)
 
Okay, since you asked, I feel exactly like I have a human suit I have to wear to work and I get this weird idea that it’s quite ill fitting and I have to keep doing things to reinforce the pretense.
I had a customer today that really tested me, he was irate and confrontational and I kept repeating my sayings to calm myself even as I was trying to calm him and he was obviously confused that I kept repeating certain phrases over and over. He finally saw reason and went away and it was all I could do to contain myself.

When I was a kid I actually thought I was found somewhere, how could these weirdo’s be my real family. Also for a long time I wondered when my powers would manifest, I kept thinking maybe I can make a difference but I didn’t know how to do the stuff I felt I needed to.

Is this what you expected when you asked a question like this? I feel weird now but glad I answered, I would normally assume their was laughter being had at my expense right about now ; ]
 
HelloDizzy said:
I tried to explain this feeling to my very normal boyfriend last night. He didn't get it.

Do you tend to feel like you are outside of the human species? As if you do not quite understand how they communicate, how they chitter-chatter and laugh constantly and have no hesitancy about going out and doing menial things?
It's kind of a feeling like everyone is in a bubble and you're on the outside of it, looking in at them, observing, not quite able to fit into humanity.

I've felt like this for as long as I can remember.
It's rather isolating.

Is this an Aspergers/Autistic type of thing? Does anyone know what I'm talking about?
Click to expand...

I have felt this way from my childhood, exactly.

As an adult (Where I can make personal decisions as opposed to being a child where social/family situations are imposed) I very often choose to forgo this sort of interaction with others.

I can be (and often am) accused of having some sort of bad attitude or not being friendly; I consider myself a nice, kind and quite polite person, BUT, I make the choice to avoid most social situations and, when I do engage in such, it just wears me out mentally and I will have to leave.
 
I never felt i belonged to the human race. Ive always felt like an alien from when i was little. My thoughts and expectations seems very different from everyone else and can be very isolating. I feel more isolated now as its xmas time now and have not had any friends ive seen during the holiday season and thats isolating as well. Ive been told im a nice person but i dont seem to draw other humans towards me very much and im not gonna go begging for friends no way!
 
It seems to be very common to feel like that for people on the spectrum. The funny thing was, I met quite a few very intelligent people who said that I shouldn't disregard a possibility that I was an alien :D I thought it was a little bit too much :D
 
Glad to see I'm not alone in this odd feeling.
Ever since I was a kid, I would as my mom if I was half alien. She said "maybe" to make me feel better.

I have been told I am very aggressive albeit aloof, and in school I was termed "scary" as well as "weird."
Now that I'm older, my looks deceive my inner thoughts; who would think I'm such a freak upon looking at me?

A line from Donnie Darko sums up what I feel about it.

Donnie: Why are you wearing that stupid bunny suit?
Frank: Why are you wearing that stupid man suit?
 
HelloDizzy said:
Glad to see I'm not alone in this odd feeling.
Ever since I was a kid, I would as my mom if I was half alien. She said "maybe" to make me feel better.

I have been told I am very aggressive albeit aloof, and in school I was termed "scary" as well as "weird."
Now that I'm older, my looks deceive my inner thoughts; who would think I'm such a freak upon looking at me?

A line from Donnie Darko sums up what I feel about it.

Donnie: Why are you wearing that stupid bunny suit?
Frank: Why are you wearing that stupid man suit?
Click to expand...

I actually wasn't intending to go the road in expressing that I at times feel that I feel my body is a suit... but it literally does. Weirdest thing sometimes is, it feels uncomfy and itchy at worst... earlier this week I actually had a day where I actually felt like my face was plastered on instead of just a "part" of me... it's a weird realisation of consciousness I think... and I'm not even including how other people perceive me or how I fit in "socially"... this is just random stuff i have going on when I'm on my own 24/7.

In a way I even think it's "boredom' that triggers thoughts and feelings like this... but a different kind than "I don't know what to with my time"... more of a apathy/boredom deal, which in result is probably just a moment of self-consciousness.
 
I usually feel very disconnected from my body. It's like my brain/my "actual" self is just inside of a human body, going through human motions and infiltrating society.
 
Yes I am an alien. I have always felt that way, and strangely enough other people have often joked that I was. At work some lady brought in this thing that you grip with your hands and it measures your body fat content and other things. For me it would just say "E." Other people would try agan and it would work, hand it back to me and "E." Over and over. I also get shocked on things a lot, and I mean a lot. Every time I get out of a car for example I reach for the door and get a huge static shock, not a little one, it actually hurts. Doesn't matter who's car it is, it almost always happens. Things like this would add to me being called an alien.
 
I do indeed feel alienated and have even been called such before, but rarely. Funny, because only the people who pick up on social details so easily have ever asked me about it. Fortunately, the person never guessed I was a case of higher functioning autism (impressive to be able to pass for 'alien', especially given my early development). There is a great amount of disconnect sometimes and I definitely relate to this, but it's not going to be an excuse to improve either.
 
jay - I have had doctors not be able to find my pulse. They usually can't, actually. My body temperature is very low as well.

jonathan - I developed early as well. Also, you spell your name exactly like my boyfriend, without the H
 
I know exactly what you're talking about. I've felt that way myself for as long as I can remember. Like the other guys said, its just part of the package, and you learn to deal with it. What you're describing with "feeling disconnected from your body" is a manifestation of your self awareness. It's one of those distinguishing characteristics that all humans possess, including us, that separates us from other animals. I've experienced it myself when I find myself doing something that I know full well is odd, awkward, or what have you, and through my self awareness, I will actually be able to look at what I'm doing and know that it's a gaff as I'm doing it. It's happened numerous times.

To put it simply, you're using your self awareness as the vantage point to view things going on around you as opposed to doing it through some other part of your mind. That's why you feel that way. I might not be completely right on that, but I think about these things a lot in trying to understand my own condition, and so, that's what I would assess you're describing.

Then, as for my own experiences with my differences, at various points in my life, it has manifested itself in various ways. There actually was a point where I didn't think I was human, and on multiple other occasions had periods where I had thought I was being affected by supernatural forces [I'm agnostic, and not religious, but strangely have struggled with my opinions on spiritual matters, although obviously, that is a discussion for a different thread]. I have been told on numerous occasions that I remind people of Spock, and to a lesser extent, Data, from Star Trek.

To conclude my side, if a person doesn't feel they belong anywhere that they see before them, then all they have to do is either go find a place where they will, or make one. If they stay still in that place where they know they don't belong however, their situation won't change no matter how long they wait. Trust me, I've learned this the hard way, your situation won't change unless you yourself get up and change it. I'm not saying that to anyone in particular, its just a philosophical point I've learned from my own experiences.
 
Yes, I had a similar revelation. I was miserable and essentially waiting for a change to happen to me, then I realized if I am miserable then it is time for a change and no one will make it happen but me.
 
To be honest, it might be difficult. People often assume that we have complete control over our actions, feelings, and personalities, but we don't. Changing deeply-rooted parts of your personality like that takes time. Its not something you can just wish to happen and have happen. I guess in this case I could just say to try and "live in the moment" more [that's essentially the mindset I live in, and it works fine for me], or find some other mindset that works for you, as in, one you feel comfortable in.

In the end though, at least from my experience, there are only two ways to change things like this with any degree of speed. First, you would have to go through some sort of hardship or traumatic experience, as often, it takes real suffering and pain to shake people out of their habits. They often say that true wisdom is earned. Obviously though, that's not something you can control, or something you would really want to happen. The second, and more viable way, is to simply contemplate these things deeply for long periods, running through it in your mind, breaking it down and such. By doing that, you can attain wisdom on it that you wouldn't be able to get through a normal level of thinking. Doing that takes dedication however, for you to truly want whatever it is you're thinking about to change, for you to keep thinking about it continuously [obviously you wouldn't think about it constantly, but it would be there in the back of your mind and would be one of the things you'd be thinking about regularly], and for you to exert yourself mentally, exercising your full mental acuity to figure the problem out.

Remember, wisdom is different from intellectual knowledge like the trivia facts we aspies are known for. Wisdom, although it can be told to you time and time again, is a kind of knowledge far deeper than simple factoids like we usually think about. Wisdom is something that has to be absorbed at a deeper level and truly understood instead of just being recorded as a simple statement that can be played back as needed. In essence, while other people can help you with this, giving you advice, which would certainly be helpful if you felt comfortable talking to them about it, but in the end, its something you'll have to do yourself. I say this from experience, as I recently had something about myself that I felt I had to engage in that very process to get through, and it was actually only by a combination of both the methods I named to you that I was finally able to get over it.
 
I understand.
I need to take control of this and internalize it before I develop a substance abuse problem even further - I use my pills and alcohol to cope with being said alien, and even at this moment I'm pissed my boyfriend won't get me tequila or more wine (I'm not old enough to buy yet but in 10 months I'll be 21, God help me.)
 
I can't say that I feel like an alien but you know how people talk about reincarnation and how they feel like they've lived past lives? Well, I feel like just the opposite, that I have never been here before but everyone else has and that is why they know how to get along and do things when I don't. Or else I was an animal in my past life. I certainly get along better with animals than I do people.
 
Ditto about animals. I am soon going to be buying a chinchilla to keep me company. I also have full blown conversations with my animals.
 
Yeah, me too. I honestly reject the notion that humans are superior to animals entirely, and actually consider my pets to be people. To me, the word "person" doesn't just mean "a human being," but can also mean any sentient being with a mind and personality that you can interact with. I believe animals qualify for that, and so I consider them people. I've always valued equality and fairness, and so it was only natural that I extended this to my opinion of animals as well.

Anyway though, it seems we're getting a bit off topic, and discussing Animal Issues could be a perfectly valid topic for another thread, just not this one.
 
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