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I survived my first week!

Well, the title pretty much says it all. I made it through my first week back in med school without any major problems. I attended all the classes, did all my assignments, found out most of my knowledge was just dormant instead of gone.

My major thought this week was: Why was this so hard for me the first time around?
Five years ago I never made it through the week without skipping at least one class. I constantly felt overwhelmed, couldn't stomach being around my fellow students, felt exhausted all the time. I tried very hard to connect to my fellow students, but most attempts fell flat. I had a few uneasy alliances at best.

This time, it feels different. Maybe it's because I'm 5 years older and wiser. Maybe it's because I've grown as a person. I'm more relaxed now, more comfortable with myself, I have embraced my flaws and talents. I don't go out of my way to befriend my fellow students, but I don't shy away from contact, and somehow it works and I'm never alone unless by choice. They want to sit next to me, they notice when I'm not there during their coffee break. I guess the key is not trying too hard, but instead just being myself and being relaxed.

At the same time I'm more driven than ever. There's never been so much at stake, career-wise, as there is now, yet somehow I feel less stressed than I did last time. I'm studying incredibly hard, waking up at 6 so I can cram in 2 hours before my lectures start, then 2 more hours when I get home in the evening. Somehow I even have energy left to do some chores around the house after I've finished studying and cooking dinner.

This is great. I just hope I can keep this up, because in the past I've often lost the healthy balance between work/study and relaxation. When I'm this enthusiastic about a subject it's easy to lose track of my needs for rest and distraction, but I'm cauteously optimistic that I've learned, and I'll do well this time. Onwards to week two!

Comments

M
Found when I was in school, that I had a difficult time focusing on specific tasks and assignments. Would go off on tangents and discover things that interested me, all the while, becoming less interested in what I specifically had to do. Really had to reign myself in, and go back to the specific area I needed to study. Otherwise I explored too much.

Sounds as if your ready to do the things that you know have to be done. Keeping focused was often my problem. Wanting to understand everything I came across thoroughly when there wasn't enough time was often a problem for me. That balance between knowing/understanding and regurgitating for exams was often a tipping point. If you can hold onto to the balance, of school and relaxation, you've won the race.
 
Bolletje
Mia said:
Found when I was in school, that I had a difficult time focusing on specific tasks and assignments. Would go off on tangents and discover things that interested me, all the while, becoming less interested in what I specifically had to do. Really had to reign myself in, and go back to the specific area I needed to study. Otherwise I explored too much.

Sounds as if your ready to do the things that you know have to be done. Keeping focused was often my problem. Wanting to understand everything I came across thoroughly when there wasn't enough time was often a problem for me. That balance between knowing/understanding and regurgitating for exams was often a tipping point. If you can hold onto to the balance, of school and relaxation, you've won the race.
Click to expand...
I've failed many exams in the past for exactly the reasons you mentioned. I have an exam coming in three weeks and I already feel the pressure as there simply isn't enough time to read and understand everything, yet simply learning to reproduce the answers asked on the test goes against my very nature.
I usually have intricate knowledge of the most rare and complicated processes while I'm struggling with grasping the basics. So this time around I'm focusing on the basics.
 
Bolletje
Mia said:
Found when I was in school, that I had a difficult time focusing on specific tasks and assignments. Would go off on tangents and discover things that interested me, all the while, becoming less interested in what I specifically had to do. Really had to reign myself in, and go back to the specific area I needed to study. Otherwise I explored too much.

Sounds as if your ready to do the things that you know have to be done. Keeping focused was often my problem. Wanting to understand everything I came across thoroughly when there wasn't enough time was often a problem for me. That balance between knowing/understanding and regurgitating for exams was often a tipping point. If you can hold onto to the balance, of school and relaxation, you've won the race.
Click to expand...
Or trying to, at least ;)
 
B
I never went to college due to the same things you described the first go around. Its really good you worked up the courage to give it another try. Hopefully you can retain enough energy and get through next week! Good luck !
 
A
Wow, I am really hoping things go well for you!! I just dropped out of a grad school program because the stress was just too much :( I couldn't cope - and though this time I really burned out and had to leave, my previous times at school I'm realizing I was also super, super stressed - I managed to get okay grades, but I didn't learn/retain any of the info, so....yeah! It's cool that you feel different and successful this time around, best of luck! Hopefully no more school for me - I think I've just burned out too many times. Hoping to find work soon.
 

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Bolletje
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