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Asperger's & Autism Forum
I can remember no problems at all before comprehensive school. I made friends easily and everyone seemed on the same level.
Then I went up to high school and everything changed, and became difficult. It seems like the biggest factor that happened though was that I dropped behind my peers in social age and interests and never caught up again.
The age gap seemed maybe 4 years, but that's very had to estimate of course. I do remember dropping interests one by one as I was either teased about them or noticed that no one else did that any more.
I've been thinking and it seems to me like this age gap (or rather societies reaction to it) has been the root cause of anxiety, at least social. I'm wondering if I'm predisposed to anxiety and that this social lag caused it to manifest.
Every time I do something that a normie doesn't do, my mother always says something like "A normal person would do/say this." When is she going to realize that I'm not a normal person and I never will be?
I don't know... What do you guys think I should do? How should I tell her that I'm not ever going to be normal?
Before I was aware that I had Asperger's I had noticed differences between myself and others, and my unofficial diagnosis makes sense of most of these differences. But I'm not sure if the biggest difference I've noticed is an aspie trait or not, and I'd appreciate the opinions of others on this site. Since becoming aware of my autism and until today I'd assumed it was part of the package, since it might go some way toward explaining why we tend to be good at the sciences.
I've noticed that my emotions and logic seem more separated than in most people, when I am reasoning it is not impaired by emotion, and on the rare occasions when I am free to become passionate without disastrous result I don't 'think' in what I consider to be the normal sense at all.
Do you think that this is true of yourself? Could this explain in part our inability to place labels on the feelings of others? And maybe the trouble with hints as well, which seem illogical and are perhaps the result of emotions...
I would define small talk (for me) as idle chat about nothing between people not about a common or specific topic.
My experience feels like I'm feeding the situation itself. I'm not doing it for myself, and I'd love to have avoided the situation altogether. Now I'm hoping to feed the situation the acceptable words in order to not appear weird or upset the other person, and draw the situation to a close.
What I find interesting is that I'm not doing it for myself OR the other person, meaning it's wholly pointless. My focus is on the situation itself, and providing for its needs.
If I could have got away with a smile and a "Hi", we'd all have been better off.
Does anyone else find colleagues really difficult to cope with?
I work in an open plan office, although have managed to get the corner desk which is great. Generally I get on ok with colleagues, although I'm really struggling with the culture at the moment. There are three people close by me, and they're all very pleasant... to your face. But each of them has bitched about the other two when they're not there.
As an example, one (say A) has been bitching about B not answering the phone, would never use the phone etc. Then to B's face she'll say that she shouldn't be expected to have to answer all these enquiries on the phone! Don't get it, never will. Which one is correct? What A said to B, or about B?
There just seems to be lots of this today and I'm finding it hard to cope with. Each time they go into a little huddle I wonder whether they're bitching about me - part of me says not to care and part of me is getting very paranoid.
When I mean by weird taste, I mean genres that necessarily don't go together. I love punk rock and I love country music. As I got older, I started getting into old time country such as Hank Williams, Johnny Cash and so forth. Punk rock has been with me since I was preteen. Social Distortion's 80's punk, Orange county (CA) punk, Rancid, East Bay punk. I am more into the hardcore 80's punk.
I feel like it is weird for me to like country and punk at the same time. People are surprised when we get into my car and I have country music on, but I am wear a leather jacket and have spiked hair. They automatically assume I like punk because of my hairstyle and clothing until the hear that I am listing to Hank Williams in my car.
Anybody else have a weird taste in music? Or do you just like any type of music genre?
I have a five (almost six) year old daughter with OCD, SPD, and Asperger's Syndrome. After having five different specialists now suggesting that I consider homeschooling her, I was looking for some opinions from some other parents with children on the spectrum?
Intellectually, she is very advanced, her peers can't keep up, and she is so clever that she has developed a real skill at manipulating the faculty at school to get extra sensory breaks. She has limited interest in peers as is, but when I ask her why she doesn't want to talk to the other kids she gets very exasperated and says things like "I just can't mommy, they just don't understand me" or "they are soooo boring" (I swear she is actually a very sweet and wonderful child!).
The number one problem she has at school (beyond the socialization issues) is that she gets bored with the materials and has a harder time keeping herself regulated during class time. The teachers have started giving her school work from...
I'm not sure if if had a problem with it at school, although just because a teacher said something did not make it gospel.
As I grew up though, I started rebelling against society in general, maybe partly because I saw how all the authority figures were just like my peers - different to me. Since I didn't trust most of them, once I saw the authority figures were just adults who were not like me, often with power complexes, I chose not to trust them.
For me trust is earned, and a title or position does not make me trust you until I've assessed your character directly.
Even though I have a twin brother who is identical, not fraternal, he does not have it. I do. I was diagnosed at age 10. My mom is bipolar and she says depression runs in the family. She also had me at 38, a few weeks before she turned 39. Could this play a factor in Asperger's?
As far as that. I don't have a dad. Well I do, but I grew up without one so it would be hard to know whoever he is, had Asperger's or not.
I want to know if it is hereditary or something else. I know AS is becoming more common nowadays than it was for my mom back in the 1960s and 1970s. I feel that age plays a factor, I think that it is more common now because people are having kids at an older age like my mom did. Can someone send me a link to a good website that explains this? I don't know any sites that I can trust on a topic like this.
I'm planning a long, stressful road trip and realize it's time to go ahead and get a weighted blanket. Any thoughts on what to look for in a weighted blanket and the best place to buy? It will need to be travel friendly but otherwise I don't quite know what I'm looking for.
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